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i need real help - 12/8/2012 7:46:00 PM   
postmanh22


Posts: 5
Joined: 12/5/2012
Status: offline 		I am new to the scene but need to be immursed quickly. Itook on a responsibility with a sub and failed. I didn't know what I was doing and was unprepared. I'm ready this time and have been given my chance. I need real conversation / experience from any dominant or female submissive. I need both point of views to do it right. If this is you. Plz email or call me. Thank you in advance. [Contact information removed.]

< Message edited by VideoAdminTheta -- 12/8/2012 7:47:07 PM >
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: i need real help - 12/8/2012 7:49:00 PM   
poise


Posts: 9509
Joined: 7/3/2010
Status: offline 		I don't think you're going to get what you need by having random people email you, or call your home phone for that matter.
Why not get out into the kink community where you can meet lots and lots of people, from every dynamic?
Try googling bdsm+your city and see what comes up.
Also, posting your private contact info is not only desperate sounding, but it's also a violation to do so.
Please edit your post to remove that.

_____________________________

When the path ignites a soul, there’s no remaining in place.

(in reply to postmanh22)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: i need real help - 12/8/2012 7:59:11 PM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline 		I would suggest getting out into your local community and finding a mentor that is in a successful D/s BDSM relationship. I would also suggest attending lectures and demos. I find that FetLife is an easy way to find groups local to you.

Also we have a good book list: I recommend The Loving Dominant by John Warren.

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to poise)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: i need real help - 12/8/2012 8:23:51 PM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline 		You either are or you are not.

_____________________________

Nothing has changed
Everything has changed

(in reply to OsideGirl)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: i need real help - 12/9/2012 8:02:34 AM   
Kana


Posts: 6676
Joined: 10/24/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: postmanh22

I am new to the scene but need to be immursed quickly. Itook on a responsibility with a sub and failed. I didn't know what I was doing and was unprepared. I'm ready this time and have been given my chance. I need real conversation / experience from any dominant or female submissive. I need both point of views to do it right. If this is you. Plz email or call me. Thank you in advance. [Contact information removed.]

How do you know you're ready?

_____________________________

"One of God's own prototypes. A high-powered mutant of some kind never even considered for mass production. Too weird to live, and too rare to die. "
HST

(in reply to postmanh22)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: i need real help - 12/9/2012 9:00:13 AM   
theRose4U


Posts: 3403
Joined: 8/22/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: postmanh22

I am new to the scene but need to be immursed quickly. Itook on a responsibility with a sub and failed.


How do you know you're ready?


My vote is he has yet another unsuspecting prospect on the line & she's better looking than the first one so he needs to do a really good job faking "domlyness" on their first date & fuck

< Message edited by theRose4U -- 12/9/2012 9:01:14 AM >

_____________________________

Finding a good sub is like sifting through trail mix. You find a few fruits, a lotta nuts and have to sift to get to the sweet and special ones
drama llama

(in reply to Kana)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: i need real help - 12/9/2012 11:29:55 AM   
Kana


Posts: 6676
Joined: 10/24/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: theRose4U

quote:

ORIGINAL: postmanh22

I am new to the scene but need to be immursed quickly. Itook on a responsibility with a sub and failed.


How do you know you're ready?


My vote is he has yet another unsuspecting prospect on the line & she's better looking than the first one so he needs to do a really good job faking "domlyness" on their first date & fuck

Well shit. Ya either take charge or ya don't. This ain't exactly rocket science.
"Do this wench, or face the consequences."
That's pretty much all there is to it.
Now, knowing how to get a person to do your bidding, to get them to line up their satisfaction with yours, that's where the mystery and magic come in.
But those are confidential secrets, and I can't say those unless I see the One Twue Dom Union card, know that I'm not breaking any bylaws

_____________________________

"One of God's own prototypes. A high-powered mutant of some kind never even considered for mass production. Too weird to live, and too rare to die. "
HST

(in reply to theRose4U)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: i need real help - 12/9/2012 11:34:13 AM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Kana


quote:

ORIGINAL: postmanh22

I am new to the scene but need to be immursed quickly. Itook on a responsibility with a sub and failed. I didn't know what I was doing and was unprepared. I'm ready this time and have been given my chance. I need real conversation / experience from any dominant or female submissive. I need both point of views to do it right. If this is you. Plz email or call me. Thank you in advance. [Contact information removed.]

How do you know you're ready?
I wouldn't happen to think he is. Otherwise, the thread wouldn't have been created.



_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to Kana)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: i need real help - 12/9/2012 11:40:55 AM   
Kana


Posts: 6676
Joined: 10/24/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

quote:

ORIGINAL: Kana


quote:

ORIGINAL: postmanh22

I am new to the scene but need to be immursed quickly. Itook on a responsibility with a sub and failed. I didn't know what I was doing and was unprepared. I'm ready this time and have been given my chance. I need real conversation / experience from any dominant or female submissive. I need both point of views to do it right. If this is you. Plz email or call me. Thank you in advance. [Contact information removed.]

How do you know you're ready?
I wouldn't happen to think he is. Otherwise, the thread wouldn't have been created.



Which was my point :-p


(That's right-I stuck my tongue out at the badass leather domme. I live waaaay out on the edge.And 3000 miles away from that whip )

< Message edited by Kana -- 12/9/2012 11:41:00 AM >

_____________________________

"One of God's own prototypes. A high-powered mutant of some kind never even considered for mass production. Too weird to live, and too rare to die. "
HST

(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: i need real help - 12/9/2012 12:02:42 PM   
Spiritedsub2


Posts: 3316
Joined: 7/18/2012
Status: offline 		Jack be nimble!

_____________________________

Don’t grieve. Anything you lose comes round in another form.
~ Rumi

Laughing Dolphin

(in reply to Kana)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: i need real help - 12/9/2012 12:38:11 PM   
theRose4U


Posts: 3403
Joined: 8/22/2005
Status: offline
quote:


Which was my point :-p


(That's right-I stuck my tongue out at the badass leather domme. I live waaaay out on the edge.And 3000 miles away from that whip )

I have never seen a little thing like distance stop LP!!

_____________________________

Finding a good sub is like sifting through trail mix. You find a few fruits, a lotta nuts and have to sift to get to the sweet and special ones
drama llama

(in reply to Kana)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: i need real help - 12/9/2012 1:07:21 PM   
noellesdestiny


Posts: 94
Joined: 9/3/2012
Status: offline 		Plenty online, and great books also.

(in reply to theRose4U)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: i need real help - 12/9/2012 1:53:18 PM   
ResidentSadist


Posts: 12580
Joined: 2/11/2007
From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
Status: offline 		Without the right approach, it looks like you are rushing head long into a disaster and you are doing this at the beacon call of a submissive that has “given you a chance”.

“I am new to the scene but need to be immursed quickly.”
You cannot learn control “quickly”, it takes time and discipline.

“I took on a responsibility with a sub and failed. I didn't know what I was doing and was unprepared. I'm ready this time and have been given my chance.”
You are not ready or you would not have made this post about getting immersed quickly. Your attitude is wrong. Dominants aren’t “given a chance” we take advantage of opportunities. Very different attitudes. You are grasping at straws on the internet and cramming for a test you are unprepared for.

Calm down… there are approximately 350 million submissives in the world. Even if you don’t snag this one, there will be others. Once you have the right attitude, submissives will naturally be drawn to you.

And if this one is so special to you, learn with her instead of faking it and taking more responsibility than you can handle and failing again. Read some books . . . hell, chain her up to the bed and have her read books to you. Go to munches, attend workshops. Admit you need to learn and share the learning experience with her. It will be a wonderful adventure together.

_____________________________

-=BDSM Book List=- Reading is Fundamental !!!
I give good thread.

(in reply to postmanh22)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: i need real help - 12/9/2012 2:06:25 PM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ResidentSadist
Dominants aren’t “given a chance” we take advantage of opportunities.


Actually, I'd say the Dominants create opportunities. Out of the four guys that I had relationships with during my 20 years. 3 of the 4 did not hit on or approach me on any terms other than making a new friend. It was their attitude and actions that drew my attention, so that when they did make their move, I was already interested.


_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to ResidentSadist)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: i need real help - 12/9/2012 2:12:48 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		What RS said. Don't fake it. Don't lie to her, although I get the feeling you already have. Tell her that you are not an experienced top, but that you want to learn with her.

Don't do anything you aren't sure about. Read about it, take workshops, learn. Ask her for feedback.

See if you make a mistake, it's her life and health on the line. You can always do it in another month once you're comfortable, or six months. You can't undo something you've done wrong.

And practice on pillows. Because it's far better if you split a pillow case than her skin.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to OsideGirl)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: i need real help - 12/9/2012 2:55:24 PM   
SimplyMichael


Posts: 7229
Joined: 1/7/2007
Status: offline 		Turn your fucking hat around, smash the bong, get a BA and a decent job. Doing that will teach you far more important,skills than all the nonsense about being dominant.

(in reply to DesFIP)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: i need real help - 12/9/2012 5:57:59 PM   
Killerangel


Posts: 1169
Joined: 8/3/2010
Status: offline 		I'm not sure why you think you're prepared this time around when you're on here asking for help and you want it fast. It's not like a series of steps that you can take and get a guaranteed result. Female submissives aren't sitting around waiting to see if you know the secret code. If you think you can get it all explained stat on a message board you really are clueless.

Seriously though, the avatar you have is god awful, you look as high as a kite. Not attractive in someone that's going to possbily be doing dangerous things to someone else. I'm not sure why this woman is giving you a chance, she must see something else positive. It's a danger to play with someone when you're under the influence of...anything.

(in reply to postmanh22)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: i need real help - 12/10/2012 11:31:21 AM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: postmanh22

I am new to the scene but need to be immersed quickly. We don't do immersion therapy. We do clue by fours upside the head. I took on a responsibility with a sub and failed. Shit happens, I hope she/he is okay. I didn't know what I was doing and was unprepared. You still are so what the fuck are you doing??? I'm ready this time No you are not. and have been given my chance. God help him/her. I need real conversation / experience from any dominant or female submissive. I need both point of views to do it right. You need more than a couple points of view. If this is you. Plz email or call me. Thank you in advance. You are welcome. [Contact information removed.]



_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to postmanh22)
Profile   Post #: 18
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