Sadists Taking Pain (Full Version)

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TieMeInKnottss -> Sadists Taking Pain (12/20/2012 8:55:51 AM)

I just finished a memoir of a masochist submissive who went into great detail on how she loved the pain inflicted by belts, canes...how she could process it, find the rhythm...but despite being a masochist, she could not handle pain from waxing her own eyebrows or how she'd scream if she stubbed her toe. It got me wondering about the other side, the sadist. They get enjoyment GIVING pain to the masochist, but how do THEY react when hurt? I know this is a generality & will get a variety of answers, but I am curious. Can they tolerate pain inflicted on them (accidentally, like breaking an arm)? Yes, I understand (or accept the concept) that the scenarios are different & just because they like to watch the face of a sub to see the cringes of pain, it still kills them to see their child get a splinter. So...is your Dom/me Master/Mistress a wimp if they get a paper cut or do they not even notice?




Hillwilliam -> RE: Sadists Taking Pain (12/20/2012 9:05:09 AM)

I'm not a Sadist.
In spite of what a lot of people will say, Im not a Sadist. If I keep saying it, it must be true right? [8D]
My pain tolerance is quite high, I'd say it's a direct result of an upbringing that was at times .........painful and 13 years of coaching and competition in 3 different styles of wrestling.

I don't enjoy pain in the least. It's just part of the day to day existence.
It's one of those things that "It's better to give than to receive"

But In NOT a Sadist.



xLaChienne -> RE: Sadists Taking Pain (12/20/2012 9:40:33 AM)

Everyone is a wimp when it comes to paper cuts.




JeffBC -> RE: Sadists Taking Pain (12/20/2012 9:47:36 AM)

I'm not a sadist. I don't really have a solid connection with pain. I have no idea how to compare pain and figure out relative wimpiness I just know that seldom in my life is pain something I pay much attention to. I tend to acknowledge it, inspect it for urgency, then ignore it. For me this gets into the control question. It's MY freakin body and I run the show, not it.

edited to laugh at LaChienne's comment
I had that same thought. Man, out of all the "trivial" examples she could have picked she chose that? I think only grass cuts are worse.



MAINEiacMISTRESS -> RE: Sadists Taking Pain (12/20/2012 9:56:29 AM)

I don't really understand masochists receiving PLEASURE from pain*. I know they DO...From a scientific standpoint I RECOGNIZE that it happens, that when submitted to pain their bodies release endorphines and they feel pleasure from it, but it has the exact OPPOSITE effect on Me!!!!!!!!!!!

Pain tends to INCREASE My Sadistic urges. I don't flinch from it, instead it heightens My adrenaline and puts Me into "FIGHT" mode, "Oh, you want to play that game, F*CKER? Well, COME GET SOME!" I've broken My finger and kept on going, cracked ribs and kept on grappling. I've always been that way, but martial arts training has certainly improved the reflex..."Pain=FIGHT THROUGH IT", get the job done.

(Martial arts training also taught Me to be CAREFUL with other people, because WOW, lose control of an adrenaline surge during a joint lock and POP! no more sparring partner and no one will want to play with you anymore. :P )

*I have one exception about feeling pleasure from pain, and that is when eating spicy foods. The pain from the capsasin and other compounds causes a warm happy feeling afterward. Is this the same feeling that masochists feel when someone tortures them? I'm not sure.

--MM



SylvereApLeanan -> RE: Sadists Taking Pain (12/20/2012 9:56:39 AM)

I'm a complete wimp when it comes to pain from things like stubbing my toe or cramps. However, I can tolerate pain if I must. If it doesn't hurt worse than going through labor with no drugs, it doesn't hurt.



TieMeInKnottss -> RE: Sadists Taking Pain (12/20/2012 10:40:11 AM)

The book was a non-fiction best seller In the UK so the author has been interviewed more over there. The one interview I read mentioned the toe stub and the paper cut.

One reason I posed the question, was because of the reader reviews. Many people go on about how she must be a victim and that someone should "whip the Dom's as" or "how would Thomas/James (the doms) like it if somebody hit them 100 times with a cane...?" This is always a common comment from people who don't understand the needs and It made me start to think...Are the sadists just like the masochists...the sexual desire or whatever makes this a different experience? For those in 24/7 relationships, would you avoid hurting (accidentally) your sub in normal day to day stuff?



LadyPact -> RE: Sadists Taking Pain (12/20/2012 10:59:55 AM)

I don't have a high pain tolerance. I am, however, quite stubborn. Good luck telling Me that I *can't* do something because I'm hurt. My other half still gets a kick out of telling the story about how I insisted walking through the hospital when I had broken My toe.

The follow up asked about causing accidental pain. I'm completely different about accidents than I am about intentional infliction. I'm the first person to want to ask if the person is ok because I've got a protective streak.



theRose4U -> RE: Sadists Taking Pain (12/20/2012 11:54:00 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

I don't have a high pain tolerance. I am, however, quite stubborn. Good luck telling Me that I *can't* do something because I'm hurt. My other half still gets a kick out of telling the story about how I insisted walking through the hospital when I had broken My toe. ]

LMAO thought I was the only one!! With horses & sports my foot & toe bones are the major ones I've broken...in multiples many many many times. Doc some years ago said if I broke foot again I would need pins. Well that just meant I tough through broken toes. I know what to do, I know heat, ice thing & know nothing other than time will fix it. Still shocks people when they ask why I'm limping "oh I broke 3 bones in my foot falling down the stairs" OMG WTF? Do you need a ride to the hospital? "Nope, nothing they can do. But will you get out of my way so I can sit down?"
I enjoy inflicting pain but I'm a puss about injury.



DesFIP -> RE: Sadists Taking Pain (12/20/2012 1:19:35 PM)

The Man's got a higher pain tolerance than I do. He'll cut himself with a saw and just duct tape the cut closed. The only time I actually got him to go for stitches was when he was taking out a broken window and a piece of glass stabbed his arm causing blood to shoot towards the ceiling. Even then his first response was paper towels and tape.



theRose4U -> RE: Sadists Taking Pain (12/20/2012 1:22:55 PM)

Eeewe arterial spray never comes off a popcorn ceiling



MariaB -> RE: Sadists Taking Pain (12/20/2012 1:32:46 PM)

I walked around on a broken leg for two weeks when the French doctor insisted it wasn't broken. I didn't enjoy the pain of a broken leg but I refused to make a fuss of what I thought was just a muscle strain. Once I knew it was broken I was proud to be called 'a fucking hard bitch'!
I'm the same with needles. Enduring the pain of a needle is challenging. Its not a turn on and the pain certainly isn't sweet but its about being brave and being tough!!



NiceButMeanGirl -> RE: Sadists Taking Pain (12/20/2012 2:09:51 PM)

I'm a sadist. I'm also a total wimp when it come to paper cuts. I don't know anyone who isn't, they frickin' HURT!

On the other hand, I have a chronic pain disorder and deal with it w/o complaining. I didn't complain about broken bone pain, post-surgical pain etc. either. The day I got my broken leg "set," I was hopping around on crutches doing my own housework to my ex-husband's dismay. I refused to let it get me down. He was pissed because he wanted to take care of me, but I can be an independent bitch. lol

Yet, sadist that I am, if someone is hurt, I'm all over it immediately finding out if he or she is okay. I'm a protective Mama Bear that way.

NBMG



CynthiaWVirginia -> RE: Sadists Taking Pain (12/20/2012 2:10:28 PM)

quote:

It got me wondering about the other side, the sadist. They get enjoyment GIVING pain to the masochist, but how do THEY react when hurt? I know this is a generality & will get a variety of answers, but I am curious. Can they tolerate pain inflicted on them (accidentally, like breaking an arm)? Yes, I understand (or accept the concept) that the scenarios are different & just because they like to watch the face of a sub to see the cringes of pain, it still kills them to see their child get a splinter. So...is your Dom/me Master/Mistress a wimp if they get a paper cut or do they not even notice?


How do I react when hurt? Depends. I raise more of a fuss over a paper cut than I do over the agony of a broken leg. I didn't even yell/scream when my bone came through my right leg, nor when I was in labor, but give me a paper cut... Not saying that the intense pain was easy to deal with, but I tend to do that silently. Stuff like bumping into corners and getting a bruise, a paper cut, or when one of my cats gives me both by launching themselves into space from off my body...are exclamatory moments, lol.

When I've tried out stuff on myself first before doing it to a sub, the pain only felt interesting. Even when I asked a friend at a play party to hit me with a single tail so I could see what it felt like, I processed the pain and only found it interesting.

Yep, I like to watch bo's face when I am hurting him. Since I usually have him facing away or face down, that's a rare moment, so instead I enjoy his body language. [;)]

If he gets a scratch or bumps his toe, I react as I did when years ago my toddler got hurt. All of my senses go on red alert until I assess the damage and see that it's limited. I cannot even go with him to his piercers' without having my brain *see* everything in that room from floor to ceiling, even to behind my back, and monitoring everyone in the room, as well as everything that's happening to bo, in a type of hyper aware guard duty. I cannot turn this off and enjoy the moment (usually, two of our other sadists friends have come to watch and they get drunk from watching. bo's piercer is also a sadist and he also reacts and gets "drunk" from watching/doing the genital piercings and needs to sit down sometimes). I am the only sadist in the room not feeding off of this. (The only way I would perv out on it is if I'm the one doing the piercings.)

That being said, someone showed me or told me about doing a "crown of thorns" and I flew so high I didn't trust myself to get up out of my chair and walk across the room, much less drive my minivan, until it wore off.

Again, I am a wimp if I get a paper cut (HATE those). [:D]



Hillwilliam -> RE: Sadists Taking Pain (12/20/2012 2:18:40 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: NiceButMeanGirl

I'm a sadist. I'm also a total wimp when it come to paper cuts.

File folder cuts are worse.



NiceButMeanGirl -> RE: Sadists Taking Pain (12/20/2012 3:01:51 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Hillwilliam


quote:

ORIGINAL: NiceButMeanGirl

I'm a sadist. I'm also a total wimp when it come to paper cuts.

File folder cuts are worse.

OMG, they hurt TOO!!! [:(]

NBMG



Kana -> RE: Sadists Taking Pain (12/20/2012 3:07:17 PM)

I live in chronic pain-for me, drinking was a contact sport-I've broken something like 85 bones over my life, most of which I didn't let heal properly. Which didn't hurt then, but ten, fifteen years down the road, yeah, I pay for it every day. If it's not my elbow that hurts, it's my thumb, or my back, or my heel, or my neck, or something
Other than the dentist, I have a ridiculously high pain tolerance. I've broken things, fingers, toes, thumbs, and just taped em up with a pop sickle stick. I once waited a a week with a broken arm before going to the hospital.Cuts don't other me-be a chef long enough and you get used to that too.
But dentists, oh fuck. I've had a few really bad dental experiences that have scarred me for life-I get panic attacks in the chair, freak the fuck out.
But other than that, naaaah, I can take pain. Lots and lots of it. Ask the mouse. I'll do something to her that will have her screaming bloody murder, pinch her hard enough to bruise or some shit, then when she whines, I'll do it to myself and not even flinch. She says I have thick skin, me, I like to think of it as "Man with no name" tough as nails :-)



HisPet21 -> RE: Sadists Taking Pain (12/20/2012 3:27:25 PM)

The mister has a ridiculously high pain tolerance. In the nearly four years we've dated, I don't think I can remember him once complaining of pain, and he does enough sports to get pretty bruised up. But I have a pretty high pain tolerance as well. IDK.



littlewonder -> RE: Sadists Taking Pain (12/20/2012 7:18:10 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Kana

I live in chronic pain-for me, drinking was a contact sport-I've broken something like 85 bones over my life, most of which I didn't let heal properly. Which didn't hurt then, but ten, fifteen years down the road, yeah, I pay for it every day. If it's not my elbow that hurts, it's my thumb, or my back, or my heel, or my neck, or something
Other than the dentist, I have a ridiculously high pain tolerance. I've broken things, fingers, toes, thumbs, and just taped em up with a pop sickle stick. I once waited a a week with a broken arm before going to the hospital.Cuts don't other me-be a chef long enough and you get used to that too.
But dentists, oh fuck. I've had a few really bad dental experiences that have scarred me for life-I get panic attacks in the chair, freak the fuck out.
But other than that, naaaah, I can take pain. Lots and lots of it. Ask the mouse. I'll do something to her that will have her screaming bloody murder, pinch her hard enough to bruise or some shit, then when she whines, I'll do it to myself and not even flinch. She says I have thick skin, me, I like to think of it as "Man with no name" tough as nails :-)



I am SOOOOO holding this thread against you! I finally have proof!!!!! mooowwwaaahhhhaaaa



angelikaJ -> RE: Sadists Taking Pain (12/20/2012 7:43:26 PM)

Pain is not a simple thing.

Pain acceptance is not a simple thing.

Pain enjoyment is not a simple thing.

First, there is the general difference between good pain and bad pain.

Nearly but probably not everyone who enjoys some types of pain when bestowed upon them by his/her dominant knows that there is a big difference between the welcomed, consentual pain of impact play and nipple clamps (for example) vs: a stubbed toe, a paper cut, shingles, a gallbladder attack or a trip to the dentist.
I have not met any woman who relishes menstrual cramps. That does not mean they don't exist; I just haven't met any.

Not all pain is equal.

Here are some other things:
There are many non-masochistic submissive partners who will accept pain and/or endure pain simply because it pleases their dominant partner.
There are many submissive partners who never experience pain as pleasure but still enjoy the sensation of pain in some form or other.
There are many submissive partners who like some elements of pain but never reach sub-space through that means; for some people bondage takes them there, and others still never find sub-space.

There are some dominant partners who love to be topped by others because they enjoy some types of sensation play, that may or may not involve pain... but for them it is sensation only with no D/s involved.
There are switches who like both dominant and submissive roles and/or sadistic/masochistic ones.

There is not only one way of experiencing pain, nor is there one way of processing pain.

In other words, I don't think this is a Dominant/submissive or Sadist/masochist question so much as it is a human one.



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