"I've been so busy ... " (Full Version)

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dcnovice -> "I've been so busy ... " (12/20/2012 5:30:47 PM)

This may be a banks-of-the-Potomac problem, given that self-importance is the emotional equivalent of kudzu in these parts, but I'm getting a little tired of folks telling me endlessly about how busy they are. Actually, the listening part is okay; it taps my aunt-wannabe nature. But it irks me that they clearly expect me to be impressed. And I'm just not. (For the record, we're not talking cabinet members or mothers of toddlers here.)

Anyone else experience this? Anyone react the same way? Just curious.





Duskypearls -> RE: "I've been so busy ... " (12/20/2012 5:36:28 PM)

dcnovice, I don't have enough to do, but I know what you're talking about.

Hey, I lived right ON the Potomac River, in Potomac, MD for 12 years and loved it. How's D.C. these days?




littlewonder -> RE: "I've been so busy ... " (12/20/2012 8:09:46 PM)

It depends on who asks me if I'm busy and if I am or not.

If someone I don't really like hanging out with or I find annoying, I will tell them I'm busy instead of telling them, "no thanks. I can't stand to be around you".

If Master asks, he usually knows when I'm busy. Most times I drop what I'm doing and do what he tells me unless it's something that I can't like when I'm in the middle of taking a timed online test for school. He's usually very understanding and gives me more time.

If it's anyone else then it depends on if I really AM busy or not or something I'm not able to do for them and then I explain it to them.

If I don't explain why I'm busy then you know I simply don't like you. [;)]




NuevaVida -> RE: "I've been so busy ... " (12/20/2012 8:23:22 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: dcnovice
(For the record, we're not talking cabinet members or mothers of toddlers here.)



You don't have to be a politician or a mother to be busy...just sayin.

My life is VERY busy...very full. I don't say that to impress, I say it because it's just the way it is. No self importance at all here, in fact I have been trying to figure out how to slow down a bit.

I'm not sure how you equate being busy with self importance.

When family or friends NEED something, I rearrange to provide what I can. But socializing usually takes some planning. My friends understand, because they're busy, too.




AthenaSurrenders -> RE: "I've been so busy ... " (12/21/2012 5:07:58 AM)

Yeh I didn't take it that the OP was complaining that people were too busy to make time for him. I think he's saying that it makes him roll his eyes when certain people say they are really busy in an attention seeking sort of way - like look at me, I'm soooooo busy! I've certainly met one or two people like that, who seem to spend more time telling others how busy/stressed/overworked they are than they do actually BEING busy. They tend to be the same sort of people who find ways to sneak attention seeking comments into other conversations too; if you're sick, they're sicker, if you've achieved something, they achieved something bigger, if you're tired, they are exhausted... and so on.




fluffypet67 -> RE: "I've been so busy ... " (12/21/2012 6:17:06 AM)

i believe that DC was speaking of folks who BRAG abut how busy they are. To me that kind of person makes we want to tell them to plan better, since Christmas comes around every year. No, they are not trying to get rid of you, but instead want to take the time to IMPRESS you with their supreme sacrifices (sarcasm) for the holidays.




dcnovice -> RE: "I've been so busy ... " (12/21/2012 6:33:50 AM)

quote:

You don't have to be a politician or a mother to be busy...just sayin.

True.


quote:

I'm not sure how you equate being busy with self importance.

It's not the busy-ness itself, but the sighing subtext of "Western Civilization would collapse without me" that sets my eyes rolling.




dcnovice -> RE: "I've been so busy ... " (12/21/2012 6:47:42 AM)

quote:

Yeh I didn't take it that the OP was complaining that people were too busy to make time for him. I think he's saying that it makes him roll his eyes when certain people say they are really busy in an attention seeking sort of way - like look at me, I'm soooooo busy!


quote:

i believe that DC was speaking of folks who BRAG abut how busy they are.


Thank you, lovely ladies. That's exactly what I meant!




theshytype -> RE: "I've been so busy ... " (12/21/2012 9:17:41 AM)

It depends on the person. It does irk me when people (the habitual attention seekers) want to give me their whole 'woe is me' story about how busy their lives are. I'm plenty busy enough on my own, and while I have to hear how busy they are I could be getting something productive done.

Otherwise, if I know they truly are busy, to the point of breaking, and not bragging about their oh-so-important life, I'll definitely listen.




LaTigresse -> RE: "I've been so busy ... " (12/21/2012 9:56:42 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: dcnovice

quote:

You don't have to be a politician or a mother to be busy...just sayin.

True.


quote:

I'm not sure how you equate being busy with self importance.

It's not the busy-ness itself, but the sighing subtext of "Western Civilization would collapse without me" that sets my eyes rolling.


Silly me. I am too busy to worry about the trivial bullshit of what people MEAN when they say they are busy.

aka

I don't give enough of a fuck to bother being bothered.




dcnovice -> RE: "I've been so busy ... " (12/21/2012 3:08:27 PM)

quote:

Silly me. I am too busy to worry about the trivial bullshit of what people MEAN when they say they are busy.

But not too busy to post about it, I see. [:)]




NuevaVida -> RE: "I've been so busy ... " (12/21/2012 3:14:41 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: dcnovice

It's not the busy-ness itself, but the sighing subtext of "Western Civilization would collapse without me" that sets my eyes rolling.


I guess it's all in how you interpret it.

Those who come across as self important don't bother me. Doesn't affect me, actually. They have their reasons. If it's because they need to feel important due to some insecurity, then I hope they overcome it.

I don't see a lot of this, though - where I'm at, we're all pretty damn busy and wishing we weren't.




LookieNoNookie -> RE: "I've been so busy ... " (12/21/2012 3:23:51 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: dcnovice

This may be a banks-of-the-Potomac problem, given that self-importance is the emotional equivalent of kudzu in these parts, but I'm getting a little tired of folks telling me endlessly about how busy they are. Actually, the listening part is okay; it taps my aunt-wannabe nature. But it irks me that they clearly expect me to be impressed. And I'm just not. (For the record, we're not talking cabinet members or mothers of toddlers here.)

Anyone else experience this? Anyone react the same way? Just curious.




I would respond to this but....I'm a bit otherwise occupied at the moment.

Sorry.




littlewonder -> RE: "I've been so busy ... " (12/21/2012 3:30:06 PM)

You know, in my entire life no one has ever said they are busy to me to gain attention. I guess I've been lucky or never catch it because I just walk away from drama. Most of the attention getters for me are always the type just doing stupid stuff.




dcnovice -> RE: "I've been so busy ... " (12/21/2012 5:00:24 PM)

quote:

Hey, I lived right ON the Potomac River, in Potomac, MD for 12 years and loved it. How's D.C. these days?

Cool! I have an aunt in Potomac, but she's not on the river.

D.C. is doing well. I'm constantly amazed at how neighborhoods that were downright bleak during my college years here have blossomed. Come and see!




dcnovice -> RE: "I've been so busy ... " (12/21/2012 5:01:54 PM)

FR

It's interesting: I recycled the OP as a Facebook update, and fellow Washingtonians totally got what I was saying. (One particularly liked the kudzu image.) So perhaps it is a Potomac peculiarity.




ShaharThorne -> RE: "I've been so busy ... " (12/21/2012 5:48:36 PM)

I just got back from Austin yesterday and am freezing my butt off at this moment. It has been a busy day for me today but shopping for the dinner is complete. No doctor appointments until January, I am making sure that Mom is recovering from the crud and there are chocolate covered cherries in the house.

Kudzu is a problem down here as well. Seen houses collapse from being intertwined with it.




LaTigresse -> RE: "I've been so busy ... " (12/22/2012 8:27:49 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: dcnovice

quote:

Silly me. I am too busy to worry about the trivial bullshit of what people MEAN when they say they are busy.

But not too busy to post about it, I see. [:)]


There is only so much I can do while riding in the car and the battery on my laptop dies. Cannot do lessons on a smartphone. I can surf the net on my smart phone.




Kaliko -> RE: "I've been so busy ... " (12/22/2012 9:22:02 AM)

I have a few different feelings about somebody telling me "I'm so busy." Depends on the person and situation, I guess.

1. I feel sorry for them. There must be a reason someone feels the need to tell me how full their life is and how involved they are. You can usually tell if someone is sharing their busy selves for this purpose. Their eyes are not invested in the conversation their mouth is having.

2. They are truly overwhelmed. These are the people that I truly want to help (and I throw myself in that group every now and then, as well). All of us have, in general, the same responsibilities - food, shelter, warmth, relationships, sickness, health, money....etc. Every now and again, through no fault of our own, shit spins out of control. We become not just busy (because everybody's busy) but...fucking busy. So if someone's world is spinning and they feel the need to tell me how busy they are, I look at it more as either a stress release for them or as a way to verbally organize themselves.

3. I am envious. My life sometimes feel smaller than I would like it to be, and when I hear of women with large, bustling families being busy, I turn a little bit green.

Self-important? I put that quality under #1. If someone is so insecure that they need to advertise how busy they are making themselves, then I feel more sorry for them than ticked off about it. But...I also think that many people are subject to it now and then. I'm sure I've "bragged" about my life now and then. (Because, you know, my life is superfuckingawesome.) It happens.

But...I would be curious...what do you do about it? Someone is telling you how Godawful busy they are, and it's not due to any particular stresses that everyone else isn't handling right then. Your eyes are rolling into the back of your head and you are beginning to think that, even if this person is your friend, that he/she is a bit of a windbag. Do you smile and support him? Do you sympathize? Do you tell her "Well then, if you're so busy, why not just quit 3 of the 5 committees that no one is forcing you to volunteer on?" Would you be a better friend by shutting your mouth and listening, or offering suggestions to reduce the busy?

Huh...perhaps this is actually stemming from a different question I may have. I might need to go start a thread.





dcnovice -> RE: "I've been so busy ... " (12/22/2012 9:51:57 AM)

quote:

But...I would be curious...what do you do about it? Someone is telling you how Godawful busy they are, and it's not due to any particular stresses that everyone else isn't handling right then. Your eyes are rolling into the back of your head and you are beginning to think that, even if this person is your friend, that he/she is a bit of a windbag. Do you smile and support him? Do you sympathize? Do you tell her "Well then, if you're so busy, why not just quit 3 of the 5 committees that no one is forcing you to volunteer on?" Would you be a better friend by shutting your mouth and listening, or offering suggestions to reduce the busy?

I generally go with sympathy and support. My experience has been that unsolicited problem-solving goes nowhere.




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