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stellauk -> RE: Interesting Article about Rude Behaviour Online (12/24/2012 9:29:22 AM)
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I'm sorry but I find the article is pretty much codswallop.
Character and behaviour are two different things, the first is immutable, the second isn't.
The only difference between face to face contact and online contact is that there's no way of seeing the visual non-verbal communication, but it doesn't mean that none of the non-verbal communication or projection goesn't come through.
It does. And even though the visual cues are absent people still can pick up on the emotion, feeling and projection or vibes lying within your words almost as effectively as when you open your gob and they hear your voice.
You see you're still using language and words, and those words still contain ethos (character), logos (thinking) and pathos (emotion). In fact it's impossible to express yourself using language or words without projecting a lot of non-verbal stuff.
This is what makes a good actor, in that he can create a character and behave and act in ways which convince you that he is that character and the ethos, logos and pathos belong to that character. When an actor is delivering lines but using his own non-verbal communication, the ethos, logos and pathos, he isn't acting, and most people would see this immediately. Such an actor is said to be 'playing himself' or is described as wooden.
There is no difference between the stage and the screen - all the non-verbal cues are exactly the same.
Good actors can play a diverse range of roles, because they can convince you each time that they are that character. Actors who aren't so good - at least in the industry - are those who can only play a limited range of roles, usually of characters similar to them.
I think a major reason why people behave differently online is because they believe that there is a major difference between communication face to face and communication online. Some people will tell you that online communication is just 'pixels on a screen'. Not true. At both ends of the communication you have a real live human being, and it doesn't matter whether it's face to face or online.
So while you may think you're getting away with it online by being rude, obnoxious, anti-social or bullying, you're actually not. You might think that you're making a statement about the person you are addressing, but the reality is is that you are making an even bigger statement about yourself, and other people can see it just as clearly as if you were doing it face to face.
Another thing is, and here I'm genuinely quite curious, where do people get the idea that just because there are sadists on this site that there's a tendency for people to be more unpleasant and abrasive in their communication?
How do people arrive at this conclusion? You see I know some sadists, some really hardcore sadists, the sort of sadists who are into some really heavy stuff, the sort of sadists who if they played with the wrong person could leave them permanently fucked up. The consistent thing about these sadists is that I find them all to be pleasant, intelligent and articulate people.
I also don't buy the excuse that people can be rude or abrasive because they are 'blunt' or 'honest'. Being direct or frank, for want of a better word doesn't excuse anyone from being articulate or from communicating effectively.
These sorts of excuses just don't wash. People are rude and abrasive because they lack the social and communication skills to communicate effectively and they don't care or pay enough attention to the feelings of others. You can be direct without being rude, obnoxious or offensive pretty much as I'm doing here. You choose the words, you own them, you're the one responsible for the way you communicate and express yourself, not anybody else.
That saying I also don't see any reason in being butthurt either over how people are online. People are as people are. Most Internet browsers are pretty much the same, and if you can't handle it there's usually a little 'x' in the top right hand corner. Nobody forces you to log into sites like this. You have just as much control over your computer as people have over their words.
just my 0.02
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