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Lilly425 -> RE: Attaching (12/30/2012 10:25:21 AM)
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This is one way I have grown already. I recognize the tendency I have to get attached quickly. Mind you, that attachment is typically to the idea, thought or fantasy of what a person is or could be. Because I truly believe that until you meet them in real life, you really don't KNOW them that well and it is largely your mind creating their potential.
Initially, I was afraid to converse too much with someone for fear that I would get "attached" and then realize we didn't connect. I was afraid it would be perceived that I was just a tease, just playing or wasn't serious in my search if I said I wasn't interested or backed off. But I've realized that as long as I'm polite and respectful, it is responded to graciously. Just because he or I decide we aren't compatible for the type of relationship we want doesn't meant that we can't appreciate meeting or chatting with another person. (And for the asshats that don't react graciously, I just laugh and use those 'delete' and 'block' buttons!)
That said, it is still a deliberate mental process for me to go slow and not get ahead of myself. But I refuse to let my fear trump the opportunity to find what I really want. That is one of the things that has drawn me to this lifestyle (and to this site) is the opportunity for self awareness and growth.
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