|
myKingspet -> The "Click" of my collar (1/11/2013 4:41:48 AM)
|
Due to life's circumstances, my King and I are currently unable to spend much time together during the week. We are able to capitalize on time together on the weekends. This situation presents many challenges. One of which for me is that I am a very high-strung person normally. I have a difficult time focusing at times. I need something during the week in my King's absence to keep my mind in the right place and not become a victim to the "out of sight, out of mind" theory. Especially since I am new to this life and am not nearly completely trained or conditioned.
That is one of the reasons for my writing assignments with this "journal". I need tasks throughout the week to occupy my thoughts. With this being said, I am writing periodically about experiences that I go through on my journey. So away we go.....
I recently went shopping. I was to get a few items that my King wanted me to utilize. My shopping list included a dog collar, leash and bowl. I had mixed emotions about the items on the list and was quite curious.
He had mentioned that he will have me eat out of a dog dish previously. I thought he was joking at the time. When it never come to fruition, I didn't give it a second thought. But, to the store I went.
When in the pet section of the store, I found myself stumped with the choices. If I was picking out a collar for my dog, this would be easy. But this one is for me. What color do I chose? What size? What type of bowl? I couldn't make the decision myself. I had to ask my King. Do I get to pick the color? They have blue, red, black and pink. I so want pink! Please tell me that I can pick the pink one! No such luck. My King wants black. His choice. So black it is.
I was equally indecisive with the bowl. A ceramic one? A metal one? Oh to hell with it, I'll get one of each and he can decide later! I hope that it doesn't aggravate him that I didn't seek his input on the type of bowl to buy.
I had the package sitting in the seat next to me with so many questions in my very active mind. Do I wear it when I get home? Do I wait for him? I thought that something this important must be run past Him. He said that He wanted me to wear it when I get home. To get comfortable in it to the point that I can sleep in it during an afternoon nap.
"How tight should I make it?" I asked. "Loose enough to be comfortable or tight enough that I know that it's there." He replied as I thought he would.
I must say that I felt a little disappointed that He did not want to put it on me for the first time. Something a little more ceremonial, much like the things I have read about. In my mind, I pictured Him putting it on me and giving me a pretty severe lesson on what His expectations are of me.
When I got home, I did as my King commanded of me. I adjusted the collar to fit as He specified. I brushed my long blond hair out of the way. Then "Click" the plastic ends connected and the collar was on. It was constricting. I could feel it when I swallowed. Constricting, but not restricting. More like liberating. I am now free to become the woman that He wants me to be and the woman that I need to be.
I look forward to wearing this every evening when I get home from work until the weekend. It will help keep me focused and my mind in the right place to remember the path that I am on and how I so very much am looking forward to my lessons in the future. I need this structure in my life
Thanks for reading
|
|
|
|
