RE: Playing on the 1st meeting (Full Version)

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Emperor1956 -> RE: Playing on the 1st meeting (6/20/2006 9:45:33 AM)

quote:

 mercnbeth said (well, merc, actually):  Of course showing up at the meeting with a plastic bag from K-Mart containing plastic wrapped clothesline and a bag of clothespins, as beth's first on-line 'master' did, is a dead giveaway.


LOL that is too funny, and too sad at the same time.

quote:

Unsaid from my previous post regarding our 1st meeting was the fact that I provided her my name, my business, my address, and any other personal information she asked and some she didn't. In her case she didn't even know what to ask so I counseled her regarding safe calls and code words and such. Even the concept of a safe call doesn't insure safety. Everyone expects a safe call, but within the safe call conversation should be code words indicating a range from 'all is well' to 'call me back in an hour' to 'come and get me quick!'; without the other person aware.


This pretty much confirms my earlier point that although while in many of these examples the people are "playing on the first meeting", in fact there has been a real exchange of meaningful information before the parties ever meet.  I, too, have had to explain to submissives how to arrange safe calls, and I have had to insist on protections for both parties before actually doing anything physical.   I usually tell a new submissive "trust no one, including Me."

Thanks for the nice story, m&b.

E.




Tamerofwild1s -> RE: Playing on the 1st meeting (6/20/2006 10:41:36 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Mercnbeth

I had a long standing rule of no play during the first meeting. I never wanted the excitement of meeting someone who shared my preferences to create a momentum which would lead into a false relationship based upon elementary physical attraction. After all, my goal was a long term relationship based upon emotional and mental compatibility being primary over physical desires and needs. I followed that rule for many meeting over a long period of time. Then I met beth...

After a few hours I broke ALL my rules! I was weak. beth overpowered me and got me 'drunk' on her personality and charms. Ultimately she seduced me, took advantage or my weakness, and had her way with me. Or was it me of her? I still respected myself in the morning and have for each of the mornings waking up next to her since that day over 3 years ago.

I'm still adamant about recommending against playing and physical intimacy during the first meeting, but site myself as a hypocritical exception to the best intentions.


Gotta love when those submissives get us drunk and take advantage of us like that huh Merc ?? I too am one who does not as a rule play on the first date, but will admit my weakness when a wiley slave uses her charms and a bit of alcohol to seduce me out of my clothes .... dammmm I feel so used and cheap .. lmaooooo NOT
I think it's in general agreement here we all have our "basic rule of thumb" ..... but as human and animal in nature aswe are we tend to go with instinct more then not in almost every case



MistressSassy66 -> RE: Playing on the 1st meeting (6/20/2006 10:56:22 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Emperor1956

I find it interesting that in answering this question, virtually every poster has said "but of course we chatted online first" (or has a similar experience).  How does that tie into the long long thread about the "reality" of online, hmmmmm?


E.



Well how else would they know how to find the dungeon....LOL
 



enthralled -> RE: Playing on the 1st meeting (6/20/2006 11:02:42 AM)

I dont play on a first meet for the simple reason that I dont want to go through the 'Oh my god, what did I do and why did I do that last night?" syndrome. Sometimes the chemistry IS there for the time being, but the next morning one finds themself feeling guilty and for ME, it's just not worth it.
Personally, I'd rather wait. [:)]

~enthralled



Tamerofwild1s -> RE: Playing on the 1st meeting (6/20/2006 11:12:21 AM)

I have posted already on my "rules out the window" thoughts .... but I too have many cases where they happened more then naught .....

ONE perticular case I met a young girl from CM .. we talked for months back and forth e-mails, messengers, phone ..... finally we decided to meet .. now she was LONGGGGG distance from me but she decided to take the bus in .. I had spoken with friends and relatives before hand they all had my address and phone numbers ..... there was no thought of the first night would be playingat all . I wanted dinner, conversation and seeing what was what ...... that being said .. we were both smitten with each other right from the time she got off the bus .... all the way home she was constantly teasing at me and taking advantage of me with lil actions .. she was such a vixen. by the time she gotback to my place and made ALL her calls I had instructed her to make it was on .. dropped theluggage in my room and went full tilt with her .. what a great weekend that was. instincts and animal behaviors can often take over without any advanced warnings .. sometimes you go with it . sometimes you don't and sit back and wonder what if ... I am not one to wonder what if . if it feels right .. smells right .. looks right it must be right and seize the moment



MrrPete -> RE: Playing on the 1st meeting (6/20/2006 11:13:48 AM)

I haven't read the whole thread so I apoligize if this has been said.

It's too bad that "what went wrong" stories get all the news coverage.
That doesn't mean you don't take precautions but it doesn't mean
we need to be paranoid about it either. We never hear about the thbousands
of meetings that went ok even if they didn't work out.

Generally it isn't a good idea to play on first meeting. However I think it would be
ok IF it's at a party with others to keep an eye on things. I would recommend a
first play date be public.



gypsyssoul -> RE: Playing on the 1st meeting (6/20/2006 11:36:58 AM)

do we not call it safe .. sane and well consensual.
for a reason? all adults ... and in that should be able to make up our own minds ..
i agree with if it feels right ... go with it
 



Sensualips -> RE: Playing on the 1st meeting (6/20/2006 1:01:43 PM)

IHOP and Chi-Chis.

I have heard more "I met him/her at IHOP stories" in the past few months.  I decided they put something in their syrup that makes people horny.

Also, I loved Chi-Chi's when I was younger.  They closed the only one around here about a decade ago.  Sigh.  See what I mean about seizing opportunity?  If I had known Chi Chis would disappear I would have eaten there more frequently.



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