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LoveSlider -> RE: Consensual non-consent or rape play (2/16/2013 11:08:09 AM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: ChatteParfaitt
When we first started this type of play, we talked extensively about what my expectations were. We covered not only what I would and would not like to happen, but the intensity of what would happen, the time line, and of course, how I would communicate real distress.
Neither of us were interested in a scripted scene, however. A huge part of the enjoyment for me is to allow myself to be terrified about what is going to happen next. That can't happen if you KNOW what will happen next. So he devised a strategy for this type of play that involves a few things:
He lets me know it's going to happen in a few days or hours, but not exactly when.
He picks and chooses between the things he knows I like and the things he likes that I tolerate and shifts them around so that each scene is new.
He's learned timing is everything. These tend to turn into intense scenes, so varying the intensity throughout the scene is important, especially for longer scenes.
If you are new to this, go slow, don't try to do everything you like the first time; concentrate on varying intensity and becoming an expert in your sub's reactions to what you do.
I really enjoy this type of play, and at this point he knows me well enough that he's much free-er to follow his own agenda. He is far more likely to push the envelope in this type of scene, and he's done it successfully, which has brought us closer.
Good post :)
My subbie has said similar, we have had some interesting conversations about it and plan to try some scenes that start off with more emphasis on the nonconsent/shock factor. The build up to it and the anticipation is certainly amusing and I think intensifies things very nicely. And when it does kick off causing that dump of adrenaline seems to be the desired result.
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