RE: Mass exodus from rival site might increase collarme membership

RE: Mass exodus from rival site might increase collarme membership (Full Version)

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leonine -> RE: Mass exodus from rival site might increase collarme membership (2/8/2013 2:45:06 PM)
Before anyone starts saying smugly "Not our problem, it's only happening to those bad perverts over there," be aware that in terms of reality, FL has not broken any of those "Big 4" rules. But apparently, posting fantasies about any of them has been enough to get them hammered. And it's not just turning off the money tap: Visa fined them massively, unilaterally and without warning of any kind. And forget the smug jokes about Canada as well. On the one hand, as a multinational corporation Visa makes its own rules: on the other hand, as a US based company with rich Bible-belt shareholders, the rules it makes are those of the Tea Party, and it doesn't matter where you are in the world so long as they have you by the purse strings. This is not something happening to someone over there which is good news for CM. This is a site by site attack on sexual freedom. One of my publishers has had to switch payment processing to Zombio because Visa decided their BDSM content was unacceptable. We all need to stop saying "It could be worse, it could be us," and start thinking what happens to people who let themselves be picked off one by one. Edited in as an afterthought - I wonder if it's pure coincidence that the Library forums disappeared without warning or explanation last Autumn? The Library has been run purely as a draw for a commercial site for some years, so it would be their style, if they were threatened like this, to just pull the plug on the risky non-paying side of the business rather than try to fight on like FL.

curiouspaula -> RE: Mass exodus from rival site might increase collarme membership (2/8/2013 8:27:59 PM)
I'm not suprised people are leaving fl, I went looking for alternatives and came across collarme thanks to this blog article I read here: http://www.barrenbrain.com/blog/2013/01/28/has-fetlife-popped-its-bubble/ All the stuff I had been reading about FL has shocked me, I had no idea the site was this bad until I was given this post. I dont know if I will stay on collarme, for me it feels a bit clunky, like an old site from the 90's, but I may get used to it if i can find a way to enlarge everything, im going to give it a go for the next couple of weeks and see what happens x

noromyxo -> RE: Mass exodus from rival site might increase collarme membership (2/8/2013 8:50:22 PM)
Fet is in trouble because they did not follow their own TOUs and were open about it. Their system of caretakes is flawed, and when you have the owner admitting they are ignoring their own TOUs, then it is no wonder that this happened

stephINca -> RE: Mass exodus from rival site might increase collarme membership (2/8/2013 9:05:19 PM)
FL is a mess all around. It was a good idea in theory but poorly executed overall. Just my 2 cents

LadyPact -> RE: Mass exodus from rival site might increase collarme membership (2/9/2013 12:09:45 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: leonine Before anyone starts saying smugly "Not our problem, it's only happening to those bad perverts over there," be aware that in terms of reality, FL has not broken any of those "Big 4" rules. But apparently, posting fantasies about any of them has been enough to get them hammered. And it's not just turning off the money tap: Visa fined them massively, unilaterally and without warning of any kind. And forget the smug jokes about Canada as well. On the one hand, as a multinational corporation Visa makes its own rules: on the other hand, as a US based company with rich Bible-belt shareholders, the rules it makes are those of the Tea Party, and it doesn't matter where you are in the world so long as they have you by the purse strings. This is not something happening to someone over there which is good news for CM. This is a site by site attack on sexual freedom. One of my publishers has had to switch payment processing to Zombio because Visa decided their BDSM content was unacceptable. We all need to stop saying "It could be worse, it could be us," and start thinking what happens to people who let themselves be picked off one by one. Edited in as an afterthought - I wonder if it's pure coincidence that the Library forums disappeared without warning or explanation last Autumn? The Library has been run purely as a draw for a commercial site for some years, so it would be their style, if they were threatened like this, to just pull the plug on the risky non-paying side of the business rather than try to fight on like FL. I can assure you that I haven't said any of that. I have said that we have to have some perspective about the situation and do what we can to become informed. Right now, we don't have enough information and we won't until we see the official guidelines. In terms of reality, yes, FL has broken those rules and that's why this massive undertaking is now in the works. Have you looked at the number of groups that the site has on the topic of scat? I'm a little confused as to whether the site knew that particular topic was a problem to begin with but that's a huge issue now. From the research that I've done, this is a monumental problem for the site. Those of us who moderate groups over there are waiting for more information.

DarkSteven -> RE: Mass exodus from rival site might increase collarme membership (2/9/2013 4:08:19 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: mnottertail So, a mass exodus of toilet slaves in some apocryphal form will descend from the vast Fetlife website down here to the rather miniscule in comparison Collarme? Is that what's on the stove here? I can hear the collective sigh of literally billions of Dominatrixes here, intoning...... "Why did I waste all that money on the 24 pack of toilet paper?" Sounds like some kinda The Million Toilet Slave March may be upcoming.

littlewonder -> RE: Mass exodus from rival site might increase collarme membership (2/10/2013 1:05:44 AM)
Visa has every right to make their own rules. If they don't want someone using their card for porn of whatever flavor or any at all, that's their perogative. I'm not a shareholder. There's no law that says Visa has to allow you to use them. Then again, I don't like FL, never have even though I have an account there. I only use it when someone responds to me there. There will always be another site that will pop up after that one and another after that one and so on and so forth. It happened with bondage.com and many other sites. This site has had it's problems in the past as well. It happens. It's no different than when ebay decided not to allow bdsm stuff sold on its site. People got used to it and have just found other ways around it under different names to sell their wares. I'm betting eventually the same thing will happen on FL. People will just find another way to "advertise" it to get around the legalities.

TheLilSquaw -> RE: Mass exodus from rival site might increase collarme membership (2/10/2013 9:46:27 AM)
Fast reply to the OP. This is not an attack on sexual freedom. This is about business. Visa and other credit card companies have ALWAYS had specific rules regarding what content can and can't be on a site where they take payments. The reality is the credit card companies have to legally cover their asses and keep the rest of their customers happy as well. Fetlife, choose not to take those rules seriously or simply ignore them. Fetlife, is now being FORCED to follow those rules or find another payment source for credit card payments. As someone who has / does own adult websites. I can tell you this isn't personal. This is business. If Fetlife wanted to continue to ignore the requirements of Visa and the other US credit card companies there is always the options of getting billing from another country.

littlewonder -> RE: Mass exodus from rival site might increase collarme membership (2/10/2013 11:04:56 AM)
I just think people there will find another way around it with the way they word things so that it passes muster. It's usually what happens with most sites. It comes back, just in a different wrapping.

Level -> RE: Mass exodus from rival site might increase collarme membership (2/10/2013 2:13:26 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: DarkSteven quote: ORIGINAL: mnottertail So, a mass exodus of toilet slaves in some apocryphal form will descend from the vast Fetlife website down here to the rather miniscule in comparison Collarme? Is that what's on the stove here? I can hear the collective sigh of literally billions of Dominatrixes here, intoning...... "Why did I waste all that money on the 24 pack of toilet paper?" Sounds like some kinda The Million Toilet Slave March may be upcoming. That just stinks.

sexyred1 -> RE: Mass exodus from rival site might increase collarme membership (2/10/2013 6:18:44 PM)
FR Where is the mass exodus? I don't see many new people here. In fact, I see less and less of familiar ones as time goes by.

Notsweet -> RE: Mass exodus from rival site might increase collarme membership (2/12/2013 2:08:19 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: fetisheden maybe you should start your own scat forum instead since every other website keeps censoring you I can't believe there's not one already.

DomKen -> RE: Mass exodus from rival site might increase collarme membership (2/12/2013 2:44:54 PM)
FR Wasn't FL founded by folks who didn't like it here in the first place?

HarryVanWinkle -> RE: Mass exodus from rival site might increase collarme membership (2/12/2013 2:46:55 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: WriteOn64831 scat doesn't harm anyone. I got interested in bdsm/femdom because i am a toilet slave; the only way that i will submit is if i am the toilet slave for a Domme... it just shows that there is a vast intolerance toward that fetish; the your kink is not my kink is understandable but that is the case in the majority. toilet slaves have it difficult as it is without being pushed further back into the closet. I have to disagree with this. Scat is dangerous. It's a great way to get hepatitis and a few other very serious diseases. That being said, I do believe that consenting adults should be allowed to do things that don't endanger anybody but themselves. I think it's a shame that FL has to make this one part of the kink communities unwelcome, as they are an excellent resource. But, it takes a LOT of work to keep a site like FL going and they do have a right to make a profit for doing so. I don't see this leading to any "mass exodus however. Scat isn't that popular a kink.

littlewonder -> RE: Mass exodus from rival site might increase collarme membership (2/12/2013 2:47:58 PM)
Yup. Just like this site was in competition for people from bondage.com. There will always be another one.

LadyPact -> RE: Mass exodus from rival site might increase collarme membership (2/12/2013 2:56:24 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: HarryVanWinkle I have to disagree with this. Scat is dangerous. It's a great way to get hepatitis and a few other very serious diseases. That being said, I do believe that consenting adults should be allowed to do things that don't endanger anybody but themselves. I think it's a shame that FL has to make this one part of the kink communities unwelcome, as they are an excellent resource. But, it takes a LOT of work to keep a site like FL going and they do have a right to make a profit for doing so. I don't see this leading to any "mass exodus however. Scat isn't that popular a kink. I've been following this since the thread was created. I was completely shocked to see just how many scat groups there are on Fet and how many members participate. It is incredibly unbalanced as far as the male/female ratio from what I can tell but there really is a following. Even after several days and I can't tell you how many hours of reading the link and discussing this matter privately with members of Fet, I would venture to say that this is one of the biggest announcements since the inception of that site. I still have more questions than answers. Until the new TOU is written and posted, we have no idea of what the scope entails.

TheLilSquaw -> RE: Mass exodus from rival site might increase collarme membership (2/12/2013 4:22:07 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: HarryVanWinkle That being said, I do believe that consenting adults should be allowed to do things that don't endanger anybody but themselves. I think it's a shame that FL has to make this one part of the kink communities unwelcome, as they are an excellent resource. But, it takes a LOT of work to keep a site like FL going and they do have a right to make a profit for doing so. FL isn't making saying THEY do not welcome people who are into scat. Their credit card carriers are saying they will not continue to process their payments if they don't follow their rules. There is a difference. Again... these are NOT new rules for these credit card companies.

UnholyBear -> RE: Mass exodus from rival site might increase collarme membership (2/12/2013 4:32:04 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: TheLilSquaw Fetlife, choose not to take those rules seriously or simply ignore them. Fetlife, is now being FORCED to follow those rules or find another payment source for credit card payments. As someone who has / does own adult websites. I can tell you this isn't personal. This is business. If Fetlife wanted to continue to ignore the requirements of Visa and the other US credit card companies there is always the options of getting billing from another country. And this is what that entire issue boils down to. Sites like Fetlife need to generate revenue to pay for servers hosting, and for the programmers to create and maintain the site, which is why they have a tiered system for people who join. You can't expect the advertising dept, the site creator and all the other staff who work on the actual site to be doing all that work for free? It is a fact of life that sometimes we have no choice but to either put up or shut up regarding the issue between FetLife and VISA. Look at it this way: Fetlife is a business and so is VISA. Both are in existence to make money. Fet is a business which is geared to the kink minded people and Visa isn't and there has to be a compromise that works for both parties. Granted it isn't ideal to what we want yet nothing in life is perfect according to our own wants.

TheLilSquaw -> RE: Mass exodus from rival site might increase collarme membership (2/12/2013 4:48:04 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: UnholyBear And this is what that entire issue boils down to. Sites like Fetlife need to generate revenue to pay for servers hosting, and for the programmers to create and maintain the site, which is why they have a tiered system for people who join. You can't expect the advertising dept, the site creator and all the other staff who work on the actual site to be doing all that work for free? It is a fact of life that sometimes we have no choice but to either put up or shut up regarding the issue between FetLife and VISA. Look at it this way: Fetlife is a business and so is VISA. Both are in existence to make money. Fet is a business which is geared to the kink minded people and Visa isn't and there has to be a compromise that works for both parties. Granted it isn't ideal to what we want yet nothing in life is perfect according to our own wants. I agree with you 100%.

LookieNoNookie -> RE: Mass exodus from rival site might increase collarme membership (2/12/2013 5:19:08 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: WriteOn64831 a rival website is forced into engaging in censorship. many will leave that web site, most understand why some is censored. but removing and censoring scat crosses the line. toilet slaves have it difficult the way it is. some that will be leaving; state by taking away fetishes, is my fetish the next to be censored? that rival web site might become very vanilla. i hope toilet slaves and scat is still welcome here. Indeed, toilet slaves have the worst of things. God help us if they stop allowing shit eaters. (WTF is next....I ask you?).

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