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RE: FinDom - 2/13/2013 9:08:04 AM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: ryandb

Have either of you browsed through the profiles labeled as female dominate?


Have you browsed the profiles and seen how many people don't know that dominate is a verb and someone cannot be a "dominate"? Everyone that doesn't know the difference between "dominate" and "dominant" must be fake.

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to ryandb)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: FinDom - 2/13/2013 9:39:20 AM   
stef


Posts: 10215
Joined: 1/26/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: ryandb

I think anyone putting in their profile that they are a findom and do this for tribute ought to be immediately deleted!!! That is not what BDSM is about!!

People who whine about what "BDSM is about" ought to be immediately deleted.

From the gene pool.


_____________________________

Welcome to PoliticSpace! If you came here expecting meaningful BDSM discussions, boy are you in the wrong place.

"Hypocrisy has consequences"

(in reply to ryandb)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: FinDom - 2/13/2013 9:51:08 AM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline
To answer your question, no, you are not right. Other than saying what the BDSM acronym stands for, you don't get to dictate to others what BDSM is about. I'm the first person to say that BDSM is bondage, discipline, sadism, and masochism. Even at that, the kink world is also about fetishes, authority dynamics, and all kinds of other things that people enjoy. You don't get to say what other people enjoy isn't acceptable.

As for violating TOS, nah, they don't. TOS is actually pretty well written from a legal standpoint. You went to *another* site and gave somebody money or gave your credit card information? Sorry to tell you, but that one is on you. CM didn't make you do that. In fact, they warned you against it so you really don't have a legal leg to stand on.


_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to ryandb)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: FinDom - 2/13/2013 9:53:12 AM   
VoluptuousVenus


Posts: 5
Joined: 10/26/2012
Status: offline
First, I'd like to say that I'm sorry that you paid tributes to people who didn't deserve it. That's horrible. However, your mistake in trusting the wrong people does not mean that everybody who says they offer financial domination is a con artist. Do you understand that?

If you start chatting with women here, you'll probably find that most of us get mail from men who aren't really submissive or dominant. They're just slapping on a label to try and scam us out of adventurous sex. The fact that those guys weren't what they claimed to be doesn't suddenly invalidate all other men who fall under the labels of "submissive" or "dominant".

The same holds true with financial domination. Sure, some people are just looking to scam you out of a quick buck. Some, like me, actually enjoy it and have fun establishing a real connection with people.

< Message edited by VoluptuousVenus -- 2/13/2013 9:55:30 AM >

(in reply to evesgrden)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: FinDom - 2/13/2013 10:06:05 AM   
ryandb


Posts: 9
Joined: 1/23/2013
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I am not saying a tribute shouldn't be apart of the kink, what I am saying is when it is the first and last words in a dommes message. "IF you can't tribute, don't bother talking to me" , "No time wasters".. "If you can't pay, then move on", "I am here for one thing only, Your money". Take a look at the profiles and tell me that those words do not dominate the majority of the female dominates on this site. Tribute is one thing, paying someone for their time and expertise is all good. What is not GOOD is if that is why they are here..... AND over the past year or so that I've spent on here, NOT ONE person I've had the chance to have a conversation did anything but ask for money. No 'adventitious sex" no "humiliation" none of the things that were listed on a profile. And if one can't even chat or message with someone long enough to get to know them, how would anyone weed out the fakes. Who wants to be a 'time waster', i don't want to waste someones time, cuz I won't pay tribute within the first few sentences. Most of you defending this are on that side of the debate because this might be how you earn a living. And that's fine. I have no problem with that end. What I am describing here are people who are here just to scam.. There is a difference between a findom and a scam artist, and from my experience it is easy spot on the profiles. The words, "Don't waste my time, tribute needs to come first".. Means that person seems to have no interest in getting to know and then actually being in sexual control of another.

(in reply to VoluptuousVenus)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: FinDom - 2/13/2013 10:27:30 AM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: ryandb

I am not saying a tribute shouldn't be apart of the kink, what I am saying is when it is the first and last words in a dommes message. "IF you can't tribute, don't bother talking to me" , "No time wasters".. "If you can't pay, then move on", "I am here for one thing only, Your money". Take a look at the profiles and tell me that those words do not dominate the majority of the female dominates on this site. Tribute is one thing, paying someone for their time and expertise is all good. What is not GOOD is if that is why they are here..... AND over the past year or so that I've spent on here, NOT ONE person I've had the chance to have a conversation did anything but ask for money. No 'adventitious sex" no "humiliation" none of the things that were listed on a profile. And if one can't even chat or message with someone long enough to get to know them, how would anyone weed out the fakes. Who wants to be a 'time waster', i don't want to waste someones time, cuz I won't pay tribute within the first few sentences. Most of you defending this are on that side of the debate because this might be how you earn a living. And that's fine. I have no problem with that end. What I am describing here are people who are here just to scam.. There is a difference between a findom and a scam artist, and from my experience it is easy spot on the profiles. The words, "Don't waste my time, tribute needs to come first".. Means that person seems to have no interest in getting to know and then actually being in sexual control of another.
Since I just got into this shit last night with someone else, before you do another thing, go read My profile. Do it right now so we can have an intelligent conversation. (The last one couldn't, so I'm giving you a chance to do better than him.)

After you've read My profile, I want you to tell Me why a lifestyle Dominant like Myself is going to sit for hours on end 'chatting' with anybody and everybody. Frankly, I'd tell you to suck it up, get out from behind your computer, and go to a lifestyle event.

Now, you tell Me why you are different than thousands upon THOUSANDS of other guys who are on the net. I'm a patient chick. I'll wait.



_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to ryandb)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: FinDom - 2/13/2013 10:37:45 AM   
muhly22222


Posts: 463
Joined: 3/25/2010
Status: offline
quote:

No 'adventitious sex"


I've never had adventitious sex, either. It always seems to be planned.

(in reply to ryandb)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: FinDom - 2/13/2013 10:45:41 AM   
ryandb


Posts: 9
Joined: 1/23/2013
Status: offline
LadyPact, There are two sides to the equation.. If you don't enjoy sitting there on the other-side of the screen or don't enjoy dominating for the sake of it, then don't do it. Why do you need to be 'paid' to do it? That is in fact then prostitution.. Rather or not sex is being had.. That means one person is getting off by paying another to get them off. No you shouldn't have to sit infront of anyone or everyone.. You can choose, but if it is going to be because I have a phat bank roll from the get go, forget it.

(in reply to muhly22222)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: FinDom - 2/13/2013 11:09:43 AM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: ryandb
Most of you defending this are on that side of the debate because this might be how you earn a living.


Other than making grown men cry, this isn't even close to how I earn a living.




_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to ryandb)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: FinDom - 2/13/2013 11:19:01 AM   
freedomdwarf1


Posts: 6845
Joined: 10/23/2012
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: ryandb

And just in case any of you think I am making this up, here is just a sample of profiles found within 5 minutes of searching, all of them most likely scams... Yes it is stupid to give your money out, but that's not my point... I've been browsing and what I find is a lot of the following profiles, and then some even very interesting profiles that have no financial domination listed, and yet still require that domination within the first email. It ruins the reputation of all, to have so many bad apples. :


The first thing you have to learn is that they are NOT 'bad apples' as you put it.

Just because their kink isn't yours or meets with your indignant approval doesn't mean they should be banned on CM or anywhere else.
It doesn't ruin anything and I really don't know why you have such an obtuse PoV about it.
If you don't like it, hide, block, and move on.

And, FWIW, you aren't supposed to name and shame on these boards - that isn't allowed here.
Try reading the rules of CM and their ToS.

(in reply to ryandb)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: FinDom - 2/13/2013 11:32:24 AM   
tazzygirl


Posts: 37833
Joined: 10/12/2007
Status: offline
The link, third up from the bottom, is a default profile that opens up to many different accounts each time you click on it. I click, I get one account, click again, get another. In your careless, righteous indignation against something you dont understand, and have no desire to tolerate, you have labeled users who have nothing to do with your whine fest here.

Way to go!

_____________________________

Telling me to take Midol wont help your butthurt.
RIP, my demon-child 5-16-11
Duchess of Dissent 1
Dont judge me because I sin differently than you.
If you want it sugar coated, dont ask me what i think! It would violate TOS.

(in reply to ryandb)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: FinDom - 2/13/2013 11:53:42 AM   
ryandb


Posts: 9
Joined: 1/23/2013
Status: offline
They are bad apples.. It is NOT a kink to set there and drain off someone's bank account while not actually engaging in conversation or any other activity. It is deceptive.

(in reply to tazzygirl)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: FinDom - 2/13/2013 12:05:55 PM   
tazzygirl


Posts: 37833
Joined: 10/12/2007
Status: offline
So, let me get this straight.

Two people are not allowed to make a consensual decision to enter into a form of a relationship because YOU dont approve of what they are doing.

Are you now the decider as to what is legal or what isnt?

Much of what we do in this lifestyle isnt "legal". Do some of it in public and its a felony.

But when TWO people decide to enter into a financial relationship, its made consensually.

Surely you arent suggesting these women (and there are some FinDoms so its not just women), are forcing men to give over their bank accounts, credit card numbers, ect, are you?

_____________________________

Telling me to take Midol wont help your butthurt.
RIP, my demon-child 5-16-11
Duchess of Dissent 1
Dont judge me because I sin differently than you.
If you want it sugar coated, dont ask me what i think! It would violate TOS.

(in reply to ryandb)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: FinDom - 2/13/2013 12:15:34 PM   
freedomdwarf1


Posts: 6845
Joined: 10/23/2012
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: ryandb

They are bad apples.. It is NOT a kink to set there and drain off someone's bank account while not actually engaging in conversation or any other activity. It is deceptive.


No, it's a kink known as being a Findom/Findomme.
And there are many that require a tribute before they will interact with you.
It isn't much different to going on a pay site - you pay up-front or you don't get to chat. Simples!

If you don't like it - ignore and move on!
What is sooo hard for you to understand??

Personally, I can't stand them.
But just because they aren't my thing, I just ignore them.
You need to learn to do the same.

(in reply to ryandb)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: FinDom - 2/13/2013 12:17:42 PM   
Hillwilliam


Posts: 19394
Joined: 8/27/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: ryandb

They are bad apples.. It is NOT a kink to set there and drain off someone's bank account while not actually engaging in conversation or any other activity. It is deceptive.

Personally, I don't get it at all BUT.

If someone gets all hard and leaky from an out of the ordinary activity, it IS a kink.

It might be stupid but it's a kink.

_____________________________

Kinkier than a cheap garden hose.

Whoever said "Religion is the opiate of the masses" never heard Right Wing talk radio.

Don't blame me, I voted for Gary Johnson.

(in reply to ryandb)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: FinDom - 2/13/2013 12:48:00 PM   
TheLilSquaw1


Posts: 16
Joined: 2/13/2013
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: ryandb

They are bad apples.. It is NOT a kink to set there and drain off someone's bank account while not actually engaging in conversation or any other activity. It is deceptive.



Even the links you posted where not being deceptive.
They told you up front what to expect.
Now if you can't read or comprehend what they have posted.
Well frankly, you're an adult.

So THAT is on you.
Not them.

You didn't have a gun held to your head.
You were not forced into giving money to them.
You were not coerced.
You made an adult decision be an adult and live with the consequences.



_____________________________

Lil Squaw

Lifestyle & ProSwitch
Fetish Model & Website Owner

This nick is being used because I can't log into TheLilSquaw on the chat side.

My Blog

(in reply to ryandb)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: FinDom - 2/13/2013 6:00:21 PM   
TNDommeK


Posts: 7153
Joined: 3/13/2010
Status: offline


_____________________________

Goddess of Duck Lips and Luxurious Hair
The working Fin Domme
Professional con artist, swindler, trixster, extortionist

Our snark-nado needs more cowbell


(in reply to TheLilSquaw1)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: FinDom - 2/13/2013 7:42:31 PM   
ShaharThorne


Posts: 11071
Joined: 2/24/2009
From: Somewhere in TX
Status: offline
Love the new avatar, Squaw! If only I had a foot fetish and and pedicure kit.

Seriously, OP, you claim to be a regular...you claim to be on FL...yet you are raising caine about a selected few. Not all FinDom/mes are balding men or cute little girls under the influence of some man making them get your money. My demands are simple...dark chocolate, rib eye steaks and Nike crosstrainers. All I have got is subs contacting me and friends with whom I exchange cards with. I really need the crosstrainers because I need to start walking again to get back down to 200...I was 325 last year and am at 270 now. Besides, Mom paid for the exercise bike...

_____________________________

Goddess of Yarn

You are making two and a half feet of irresistible, tubular sex! -Lola, Kinky Boots

Founder: Bitch with Tits

Whip me, beat me, make me feel cheap and have great sex

(in reply to TNDommeK)
Profile   Post #: 38
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