Genuine or not

Genuine or not (Full Version)

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nighttimekiss -> Genuine or not (2/15/2013 5:15:52 AM)
Hi I'm Lou and my question is how do u tell if someone is genuine I keep getting a lot of fake people messaging me

TheLilSquaw -> RE: Genuine or not (2/15/2013 5:20:16 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: nighttimekiss Hi I'm Lou and my question is how do u tell if someone is genuine I keep getting a lot of fake people messaging me To ME the only real way to know if someone is "genuine" or who / what they claim to be is through real life interaction. That means setting up a meeting, having face to face conversation. During email exchangs, IM conversations or even webcam conversations it is easy to "fake it." Plus you are missing a lot of social cues.

AthenaSurrenders -> RE: Genuine or not (2/15/2013 5:55:29 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: nighttimekiss Hi I'm Lou and my question is how do u tell if someone is genuine I keep getting a lot of fake people messaging me It depends what you mean by 'genuine'. The easiest way is 'hey, wanna meet for coffee on Saturday?' If you mean 'are they really the age/gender they claim to be?' chatting on webcam might help. If you mean 'are they really dominant/submissive' you just have to get to know them. If you mean 'are they looking for an actual relationship rather than just jerking off online' going on a date is a good first step (not to mention a profile which is all dick pics and fantasies should tip you off). If you mean 'are they a scammer' then generally scammers will start asking for money pretty early on, asking for money for plane tickets or such. If you mean 'not an asshole' - well that just counts on you having good social skills and figuring a person out. Also consider your profile - it says nothing about you, shows no personality and doesn't even make it clear whether you are looking for long term, or play partners, or no-strings. It won't put off people who are just looking for online kink, scammers or creeps, but it might just put off someone who is looking for something more.

Focus50 -> RE: Genuine or not (2/15/2013 12:20:10 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: nighttimekiss Hi I'm Lou and my question is how do u tell if someone is genuine I keep getting a lot of fake people messaging me There are no "fake people", just an awful lot of jerks and time-wasters who are simply too real. So forget the D/s for a minute and know that people are exactly the same in every walk of life - genuine/sincere/trustworthy at one end to wankers/liars/users at the other and every possible degree in between. You "know" the difference by having some measure of life experience and trusting your own instincts about whether what you're reading seems sincere, and if it's specifically aimed at you - as opposed to some generic form letter being rehashed. Says you're 32, you should know a thing or two about jerks vs genuine.... Also says you're female, submissive and new to it all - that combination makes you a prime target for every horny, time-wasting jerk out there. Welcome to the lifestyle (anyway... lol) and to the Forums. :) Focus.

peppermint -> RE: Genuine or not (2/15/2013 2:11:54 PM)
There is no secret to discovering if someone is the right someone for you. It takes time, lots of getting to know you time, face to face, in person. Then it's up to you to take the information you have and make a decision.

Kana -> RE: Genuine or not (2/15/2013 4:18:59 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: nighttimekiss Hi I'm Lou and my question is how do u tell if someone is genuine I keep getting a lot of fake people messaging me If she's sucking my dick, she may just be real

HarryVanWinkle -> RE: Genuine or not (2/15/2013 4:33:54 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: TheLilSquaw quote: ORIGINAL: nighttimekiss Hi I'm Lou and my question is how do u tell if someone is genuine I keep getting a lot of fake people messaging me To ME the only real way to know if someone is "genuine" or who / what they claim to be is through real life interaction. That means setting up a meeting, having face to face conversation. During email exchangs, IM conversations or even webcam conversations it is easy to "fake it." Plus you are missing a lot of social cues. ^^^ What she said.^^^ And, by the way, a profile that says nothing but, "IM LOU AND IM VERY NEW TO THIS CAN U SHOW ME THE WAY" is an open invitation to every cyberdom on CM to send you messages.

littlewonder -> RE: Genuine or not (2/15/2013 5:53:41 PM)
By talking to them.

graceadieu -> RE: Genuine or not (2/16/2013 10:49:23 AM)
In addition to what everyone else said, which was all good valuable advice, you can get clues from people's profiles. If it's all about fantasy stuff, "I will keep you locked up in my dungeon 24 hours a day" etc, and a bunch of porn photos, they're probably not seriously looking for a real-life relationship. If they talk about who they are as a person, what their personal (non-sexual) interests are, stuff that's grounded in reality, they're more likely to be sincerely looking for a relationship.

evesgrden -> RE: Genuine or not (2/16/2013 11:57:04 AM)
quote: a lot of fake people messaging me I don't understand what you're asking or why, because if you hadn't figured it out you wouldn't know they were fakes.

absolutchocolat -> RE: Genuine or not (2/16/2013 2:40:38 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Kana If she's sucking my dick, she may just be real That's a superb method, Kana!

Kana -> RE: Genuine or not (2/16/2013 11:02:46 PM)
It's the open mouth test. "Lets play Watergate. You can be Deep Throat." [8D]

ARIES83 -> RE: Genuine or not (2/17/2013 3:04:20 AM)
Your getting a lot of messages?! Your doing better than me buddy so don't be so quick to knock it. How do you know that they are fake anyway if your asking here for pointers for telling if someone is genuine? Don't send people money, and it doesn't matter if they are fake by any definition.

DarkSteven -> RE: Genuine or not (2/17/2013 5:51:08 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ARIES83 Your getting a lot of messages?! Your doing better than me buddy so don't be so quick to knock it. How do you know that they are fake anyway if your asking here for pointers for telling if someone is genuine? Don't send people money, and it doesn't matter if they are fake by any definition. ARIES83, the OP is female.

ARIES83 -> RE: Genuine or not (2/17/2013 10:08:14 AM)
Ah-so, it all suddenly seems so clear.

TAFKAA -> RE: Genuine or not (2/18/2013 2:57:52 AM)
Check the inside tag on their pajamas.

Craftsman -> RE: Genuine or not (2/19/2013 9:40:06 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: TAFKAA Check the inside tag on their pajamas. Pyjamas? What are pyjamas? What is the use for and of pyjamas?

TAFKAA -> RE: Genuine or not (2/20/2013 12:09:26 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Craftsman quote: ORIGINAL: TAFKAA Check the inside tag on their pajamas. Pyjamas? What are pyjamas? What is the use for and of pyjamas? All Dominants wear bitchin' pajamas. How could you not know this?

FrostedFlake -> RE: Genuine or not (2/20/2013 5:53:07 AM)
There should be a list of all the real people. That would make things a lot easier on the rest of us.

MarcEsadrian -> RE: Genuine or not (2/20/2013 11:28:27 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: nighttimekiss Hi I'm Lou and my question is how do u tell if someone is genuine I keep getting a lot of fake people messaging me Rule Number 1: Be a little skeptical and suspicious by default. Don't gobble up preferred illusions of who might be on the other end. If you're in control of your own passions and remain a faithful servant of reason, you won't be easily lured to believe in nonsense. Rule Number 2: Keep in mind that the amount of attention you receive should be directly proportional to your visibility on any given network. It takes time and effort to be noticed online these days. If you're seldom active but a hot, barely legal porn star quality bombshell is messaging you out of the blue anyway, there's a good chance the profile is fake and selling something. Rule Number 3: Note that sincere human interaction is usually organic: it does not initiate conversation randomly and blindly like a phone sex sales pitch. Most people who come to you speaking of their desire do so after observing you for some time. They write thoughtfully and not in coyish riddles. The dialog is easy. Rule Number 4: Get a telephone number fairly soon if conversation persists and seems to hold merit. Meet fairly soon (your call on that) after this period if communications continue to go well. Don't accept any excuses why neither are feasible. Follow these rules and you'll avoid wasting a lot of time. Ignore them at your own risk.

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