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Potential Sub likes pain - 2/23/2013 10:40:51 PM   
MarVet82


Posts: 22
Joined: 2/17/2013
Status: offline 		Ok. Thought I would ask more experienced Masters.

In the past I have primarily been a pleasure giver/denier type of master. In fact i love giving pleasure or using its denial as punishment. Orgasm control type of thing. I'm talking to a sub who derives pleasure from pain. Would this type still function in my role as master.

I see it as an extension of my pleasure control if I use her pain seeking in place of pleasure.

Any ideas or concerns. Thanks
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RE: Potential Sub likes pain - 2/23/2013 11:34:05 PM   
myotherself


Posts: 7157
Joined: 3/9/2006
From: The cold bit of the UK
Status: offline 		There are many, many of us who get pleasure from pain and are in M/s or D/s relationships.

Yes, you can use pain giving/denial in the same way as orgasm giving/denial.

If you're not used to giving pain to a sub, I urge you to read up on it, get involved in your local community and talk to people who know what they're doing, and always, always talk to your sub to get feedback.

_____________________________

There's nowt so queer as folk


(in reply to MarVet82)
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RE: Potential Sub likes pain - 2/23/2013 11:37:37 PM   
xLaChienne


Posts: 259
Joined: 11/12/2011
Status: offline 		The real question you need to consider is if you will derive pleasure from giving pain and if you are willing to put in the time and effort in learning how to do so safely.

(in reply to MarVet82)
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RE: Potential Sub likes pain - 2/24/2013 5:02:33 AM   
DarkSteven


Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline 		This is a golden opportunity for you to see if you can learn something new about yourself. Go for it!

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to xLaChienne)
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RE: Potential Sub likes pain - 2/24/2013 5:40:56 AM   
DV1970


Posts: 4
Joined: 1/14/2013
Status: offline 		I think this is a great opportunity to learn about yourself. Maybe you haven't gotten into pain application because you haven't had the chance or a sub that was into it. This could be a time to be pushed yourself and learn more about what you like and are capable of doing.
On the other hand, it could be because you are more of the type Master you describe and don't enjoy giving as much pain.
The real question becomes can you give her what she likes and feels she needs, and put the time and effort in, even if you find you don't really care for it?
Only time and actual experience will tell you. But listen to your gut feeling. If it tells you that you might like it, then go for it. If it tells you this isn't really you, then I would think twice. If you do decide to go forward, please do learn and research. There is no substitute for greater learning.

DV

(in reply to DarkSteven)
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RE: Potential Sub likes pain - 2/24/2013 7:55:09 AM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: myotherself
If you're not used to giving pain to a sub, I urge you to read up on it, get involved in your local community and talk to people who know what they're doing, and always, always talk to your sub to get feedback.


This is incredibly important.


_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to myotherself)
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RE: Potential Sub likes pain - 2/24/2013 8:07:52 AM   
MarVet82


Posts: 22
Joined: 2/17/2013
Status: offline 		Thanks for the advice.
I am not completely new to pain application. Have done some cutting and needle play before but that was years ago. And I dont think that I am adverse to giving pain now.

I'm more than willing to learn what she needs. Any good resources out there for pain application that doesn't invovle buying books?

(in reply to DV1970)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Potential Sub likes pain - 2/24/2013 9:51:19 AM   
theRose4U


Posts: 3403
Joined: 8/22/2005
Status: offline 		Sure attending your local munch so locals will invite you to play parties & demos. I would also STRONGLY suggest you get some skill brush up before you start needle play with rust.

_____________________________

Finding a good sub is like sifting through trail mix. You find a few fruits, a lotta nuts and have to sift to get to the sweet and special ones
drama llama

(in reply to MarVet82)
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RE: Potential Sub likes pain - 2/24/2013 12:08:15 PM   
Focus50


Posts: 3962
Joined: 12/28/2004
From: Newcastle, Australia
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MarVet82

Thanks for the advice.
I am not completely new to pain application. Have done some cutting and needle play before but that was years ago. And I dont think that I am adverse to giving pain now.

I'm more than willing to learn what she needs. Any good resources out there for pain application that doesn't invovle buying books?


I was gonna pass 'til I read your second post.....

Me, I like dishing out some pain to my girl, as well as visiting the extremes of pleasure vs pain etc upon her. But I have a personal hard limit of permanent marks or drawing blood so I won't cut or stick needles in anyone.

All I'm saying is that you don't need to cause actual damage to her in exploring pain; that there's a lot of territory between her liking/wanting pain and your personal experience of making someone actually bleed.

That and what xLaChienne said....

Focus.

_____________________________

Never underestimate the persuasive power of stupid people in large groups. <unknown>

Your food is for eating, not torturing. <my mum> (Errm, when I was a kid)

(in reply to MarVet82)
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RE: Potential Sub likes pain - 2/24/2013 2:45:20 PM   
HarryVanWinkle


Posts: 1720
Joined: 5/8/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: theRose4U

Sure attending your local munch so locals will invite you to play parties & demos. I would also STRONGLY suggest you get some skill brush up before you start needle play with rust.


Yeah, them rusty needles are dangerous.

(in reply to theRose4U)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Potential Sub likes pain - 2/24/2013 2:55:05 PM   
MarVet82


Posts: 22
Joined: 2/17/2013
Status: offline 		Oh I'm not saying there isnt a lot of ground between blood letting and pain. And I'm not sure that we would take it that far not in the near future anyway.

Basically I was in the cutting arrangement for a very short amount of time not because I didnt like it but because the sub didnt last. And I never encountered another sub that was into pain that way.
And munches would be great if there was a local one. North Mississippi here

Lol yeah got to keep up with those tetnus shots

(in reply to Focus50)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Potential Sub likes pain - 2/24/2013 3:45:17 PM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline 		Yes and no.

for some, it would work in your type of relationship.

For others, it won't.


You need to talk to the person and find out.

I know.....talk is such a horrible horrible idea.




As for pain without damage, Master and I could be sitting in front of the tv and he can be pinching and hitting me all over. Painful yes, damaging, no.


< Message edited by littlewonder -- 2/24/2013 3:47:27 PM >

_____________________________

Nothing has changed
Everything has changed

(in reply to MarVet82)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Potential Sub likes pain - 2/24/2013 4:02:51 PM   
MarVet82


Posts: 22
Joined: 2/17/2013
Status: offline 		Talking is a definite. We are still talking havent even had our first encounter yet in our M/S roles. We are both looking for weekend play and she is just entering the scene. So all we are doing is talking right now.

I am trying to get a feel of what she really wants out of this kind of relationship. She is still learning to trust me as a Master. And i am glad we are taking it slow.

(in reply to littlewonder)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Potential Sub likes pain - 2/24/2013 4:14:21 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		You don't like books? Man, you just lost points.

You and I will have to find some other common ground.


_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to MarVet82)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Potential Sub likes pain - 2/24/2013 5:57:37 PM   
MarVet82


Posts: 22
Joined: 2/17/2013
Status: offline 		I like books fine, have like 500 on my shelves but dont have the money for more at the moment.

And I know anything free would have to be taken with a grain or bucket of salt lol

(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Potential Sub likes pain - 2/24/2013 7:29:47 PM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline 		You might be able to find them for free to download online. That's how I got all my textbooks for college. I looked up the titles and found people who had downloaded them online for free.


_____________________________

Nothing has changed
Everything has changed

(in reply to MarVet82)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Potential Sub likes pain - 2/25/2013 5:41:41 PM   
HarryVanWinkle


Posts: 1720
Joined: 5/8/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MarVet82

I like books fine, have like 500 on my shelves but dont have the money for more at the moment.

And I know anything free would have to be taken with a grain or bucket of salt lol


Sorta like stuff you read on the internet?

(in reply to MarVet82)
Profile   Post #: 17
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