RE: Is there a line between bitch and dom?

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

RE: Is there a line between bitch and dom?

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: Is there a line between bitch and dom?

Page: << < prev 1 2 [3] 4 next > >>

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

RE: Is there a line between bitch and dom? - 3/2/2013 4:33:47 PM

HarryVanWinkle

Posts: 1720
Joined: 5/8/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: estimer

(note: bitch is being used gender neutral)

Sorry, I don't buy it anymore than I buy the "N" word being used race neutral. A good gender neutral term would be, among many others, "asshole." And, as a dom I greatly respect says, "Being a dom is NOT an excuse to be an asshole."

(in reply to estimer)

Profile

Post #: 41

RE: Is there a line between bitch and dom? - 3/2/2013 4:36:03 PM

estimer

Posts: 76
Joined: 3/1/2013
Status: offline

Touche'

(in reply to HarryVanWinkle)

Profile

Post #: 42

RE: Is there a line between bitch and dom? - 3/2/2013 6:13:33 PM

littlewonder

Posts: 15659
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: estimer

(note: bitch is being used gender neutral)
So is it a requirement that a dom be outright mean?

No there is not.

_____________________________

Nothing has changed
Everything has changed

(in reply to estimer)

Profile

Post #: 43

RE: Is there a line between bitch and dom? - 3/2/2013 8:06:27 PM

NiceButMeanGirl

Posts: 2756
Joined: 11/4/2011
From: Bellingham, WA U.S.A.
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: estimer

(note: bitch is being used gender neutral)
So is it a requirement that a dom be outright mean?

There is a difference between being a bitch/asshole and a Dom/me. There is also a difference between being a bitch and being straightforward, blunt and to the point. A bitch is a bitch, the others are not necessarily a bitch. Btw, I don't believe for one second that bitch is a gender neutral term. When's the last time you heard someone call a man a bitch?

NBMG

_____________________________

I'm now SweetlySadistic1 on CollarSpace. NBMG is an old profile, please see my new one.

(in reply to estimer)

Profile

Post #: 44

RE: Is there a line between bitch and dom? - 3/2/2013 8:21:08 PM

DesFIP

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline

Not to mention that starting this as a thinly veiled diatribe against Lady P because she was blunt is definitely uncool.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!

(in reply to NiceButMeanGirl)

Profile

Post #: 45

RE: Is there a line between bitch and dom? - 3/2/2013 8:47:31 PM

NiceButMeanGirl

Posts: 2756
Joined: 11/4/2011
From: Bellingham, WA U.S.A.
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

Not to mention that starting this as a thinly veiled diatribe against Lady P because she was blunt is definitely uncool.

That is definitely a lame ass move.

NBMG

_____________________________

I'm now SweetlySadistic1 on CollarSpace. NBMG is an old profile, please see my new one.

(in reply to DesFIP)

Profile

Post #: 46

RE: Is there a line between bitch and dom? - 3/2/2013 9:01:56 PM

DomMeinCT

Posts: 2355
Joined: 5/5/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

Not to mention that starting this as a thinly veiled diatribe against Lady P because she was blunt is definitely uncool.

Agree. Between that and post #24 (the huge cut and paste of part of the TOS to support a continued argument that it was wrong to remove a profile pic) and three pages now of it all...

Gosh, this is sounding very very familiar.

_____________________________

The meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two chemical substances:
if there is any reaction, both are transformed.
~ Carl Jung

(in reply to DesFIP)

Profile

Post #: 47

RE: Is there a line between bitch and dom? - 3/2/2013 9:07:51 PM

seekingreality

Posts: 599
Joined: 8/11/2011
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: estimer

(note: bitch is being used gender neutral)
So is it a requirement that a dom be outright mean?

Personally, I hate it when people try to reduce things to semantics. Basically, if it works for you, it works for you,

(in reply to estimer)

Profile

Post #: 48

RE: Is there a line between bitch and dom? - 3/2/2013 9:39:32 PM

BlkTallFullfig

Posts: 5585
Joined: 6/25/2004
Status: offline

I'm kind of surprised this thread has continued, given he outed self as a flamer. M

_____________________________

a.k.a. SexyBossyBBW
""Touching was, and still is, and will always be, the true revolution" Nikki Giovanni

(in reply to estimer)

Profile

Post #: 49

RE: Is there a line between bitch and dom? - 3/3/2013 4:44:40 AM

theRose4U

Posts: 3403
Joined: 8/22/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: crazyml

quote:

ORIGINAL: estimer

(note: bitch is being used gender neutral)
So is it a requirement that a dom be outright mean?

Errm... can you understand why my first reaction might have been "what a fucking stupid question"?

But of course you're not confused, you're creating a whole thread because your botty is sore from another thread?

Perhaps someone should start a thread asking whether it's a requirement that all men that get their asses kicked by women on this site turn into whining little babies?

YES, yes it is...see no second thread needed

_____________________________

Finding a good sub is like sifting through trail mix. You find a few fruits, a lotta nuts and have to sift to get to the sweet and special ones
drama llama

(in reply to crazyml)

Profile

Post #: 50

RE: Is there a line between bitch and dom? - 3/3/2013 5:36:31 AM

Kana

Posts: 6676
Joined: 10/24/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: estimer

(note: bitch is being used gender neutral)
So is it a requirement that a dom be outright mean?

Shit. You mean I've been doing it wrong all these years

_____________________________

"One of God's own prototypes. A high-powered mutant of some kind never even considered for mass production. Too weird to live, and too rare to die. "
HST

(in reply to estimer)

Profile

Post #: 51

RE: Is there a line between bitch and dom? - 3/3/2013 5:57:43 AM

searching4mysir

Posts: 2757
Joined: 6/16/2011
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: NiceButMeanGirl

When's the last time you heard someone call a man a bitch?

When it is meant to say he is being a whiny child (what a whiny bitch). Not the same context at all, but men HAVE been called bitches here before.

_____________________________

No longer searching -- found my one and only right here on CM

(in reply to NiceButMeanGirl)

Profile

Post #: 52

RE: Is there a line between bitch and dom? - 3/3/2013 6:50:08 AM

LaTigresse

Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: estimer

(note: bitch is being used gender neutral)
So is it a requirement that a dom be outright mean?

To some, usually it is insecure chest thumping men and the women that find them attractive, I am occasionally seen as a bitch. To others, I am not. It's a matter of perception.

I've been at a new job for just over a month and I am 100% certain no one there sees me as a bitch, unless it is my bitchy sister-in-law's niece, that works in the shipping dept. But that would be because of old family issues. At work I've been nothing but genuine. Just a bit of me, lite. I am smart enough to know that this new crew doesn't know me. Doesn't know my work ethic. Doesn't know my humour. Doesn't know what I am capable of.

This new company is huge on customer service. It's their primary goal. So, the biggest part of my job is to make sure the customer gets served in a timely fashion. No one gets the run around, no one sits on hold forever, no one wanders around the lobby without being helped. I have the authority to tell the consultants to take care of business. BUT, another big deal within the company is manners. Even when telling a consultant to get on the phone and take care of business, it has to be done pleasantly and with a 'please'. It's a big deal to the owners.

Which leads to something we've often discussed on here. A dominant person, master, mistress, can give an order that must be obeyed, with a please and thank you. It's not necessary to be a rude bint to get your way.

As others have mentioned, speaking bluntly often gets perceived by the, less that bright, or the more insecure, as rudeness. No surprise, I am a fan of blunt speech. The less frills and frou frou, the better for ME. Clear, concise and to the point is my preference. Unfortunately, it is a trait often lauded in men and criticized in women.

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to estimer)

Profile

Post #: 53

RE: Is there a line between bitch and dom? - 3/3/2013 7:30:41 AM

ChatteParfaitt

Posts: 6562
Joined: 3/22/2011
From: The t'aint of the Midwest -- Indiana
Status: offline

FR

Yeah, I can be a first class BIOTCH, and it has nothing to do with being dominant. To me, being a bitch is being mean by intent, and in areas of a relationship it's entirely inappropriate. Believe me, Himself has no issue with pointing out that I'm being a bit bitchy, and should stop.

With my sub, it's different. I tend to go into bitch mode more for the sake of getting his attention about something, b/c for the most part I'm a kind, compassionate dominant, or at least that's my goal.

I don't think you can be an effective dominant w/o being a bit of meanie sometimes. B/c part of that role is making the hard decisions and saying no, or pointing out inappropriate behavior, and such like. Which means at times you have to hit someone up side the head with a verbal clue by four.

_____________________________

(in reply to LaTigresse)

Profile

Post #: 54

RE: Is there a line between bitch and dom? - 3/3/2013 9:55:34 AM

JeffBC

Posts: 5799
Joined: 2/12/2012
From: Canada
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: estimer
So is it a requirement that a dom be outright mean?

LOL... Let's deconstruct that for a moment.

Do you honestly think that anyone who actually had a dominant mental attitude would be very accepting of "requirements" placed on him or her by outsiders? That sounds more like a submissive mentality to me. Put differently...

I'm not a true dom because I'm actually dominant :)

_____________________________

I'm a lover of "what is", not because I'm a spiritual person, but because it hurts when I argue with reality. -- Bryon Katie
"You're humbly arrogant" -- sunshinemiss
officially a member of the K Crowd

(in reply to estimer)

Profile

Post #: 55

RE: Is there a line between bitch and dom? - 3/3/2013 10:27:04 AM

DominaKittyK

Posts: 24
Joined: 3/3/2013
Status: offline

I say yes there is a clear line between being a Dom/me and being a pitch. I also say that attitude comes down to what kind of Dom/me and person they are as well as what they want to be....

(in reply to chatterbox24)

Profile

Post #: 56

RE: Is there a line between bitch and dom? - 3/3/2013 10:53:23 AM

SeekingTrinity

Posts: 1834
Joined: 5/29/2012
From: The 'burbs of Portland, OR
Status: offline

~FRing it~

Ah, the butthurt runs deep in this one.

Is it a requirement of a dom to be outright mean? No, but it is a perk of the job sometimes. Look at it this way, its hard out there for a dom. Case in point, you get someone who gets all twisted out of shape because he saw what he thought was someone being mean (Im assuming it was to you, OP?) in another thread. So they starts a thread specifically to bitch about this [sarcasm]mean, horrible, nasty[/sarcasm] way they were treated in another thread. A person can only handle so much whiny, needy, butthurt thin skinned bitching.

I personally dig people who tell it like it is and dont throw candy coating and fuzzy bunnies all over the place. I like people who cut out the bullshit and give it to you straight. In essence, I like people who dont bother with shitting rainbows all over the place just to not offend someone's delicate sensibilities.

(in reply to DominaKittyK)

Profile

Post #: 57

RE: Is there a line between bitch and dom? - 3/3/2013 12:24:22 PM

littlewonder

Posts: 15659
Status: offline

I'm not allowed to say the "m" word so I'll try to say it another way.....yes Master is dominant, yes he can be mea.....eeeerrr.....not nice sometimes. First of all, he's a sadist...goes along with the territory. Other times, he gets annoyed with me over something and wants to get my attention. I do it with my kid. I think everyone does it from time to time unless they are the type that is afraid of everyone and everything.

_____________________________

Nothing has changed
Everything has changed

(in reply to SeekingTrinity)

Profile

Post #: 58

RE: Is there a line between bitch and dom? - 3/3/2013 2:16:45 PM

HarryVanWinkle

Posts: 1720
Joined: 5/8/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DominaKittyK

I say yes there is a clear line between being a Dom/me and being a pitch.

In my book, it kind of depends on what you're pitching.

(in reply to DominaKittyK)

Profile

Post #: 59

RE: Is there a line between bitch and dom? - 3/3/2013 3:16:13 PM

NiceButMeanGirl

Posts: 2756
Joined: 11/4/2011
From: Bellingham, WA U.S.A.
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: searching4mysir

quote:

ORIGINAL: NiceButMeanGirl

When's the last time you heard someone call a man a bitch?

When it is meant to say he is being a whiny child (what a whiny bitch). Not the same context at all, but men HAVE been called bitches here before.

I never said a man has NEVER been called a bitch. I just asked when the last time was he'd heard a man be called a bitch.

NBMG

_____________________________

I'm now SweetlySadistic1 on CollarSpace. NBMG is an old profile, please see my new one.

(in reply to searching4mysir)

Profile

Post #: 60