How much merit do you put in a picture? (Full Version)

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chatterbox24 -> How much merit do you put in a picture? (3/21/2013 10:07:29 AM)

I am very curious about people's experiences or how much clout they put into things.

If you saw someones picture or even cam and didnt feel instant chemistry, would that affect you meeting them if you liked them in every other single way?

I know in the past, if I didnt feel that physical attraction from the look, it just didnt work out. I am curious to learn if anyone felt like that but after meeting the person it changed?

P.S. NO, I am not looking for anyone.




searching4mysir -> RE: How much merit do you put in a picture? (3/21/2013 10:18:43 AM)

I've always been far more attracted to brains and talent than faces and bodies. If you can engage my mind you can capture my heart.

Even in high school and college, when I was much thinner and younger, I tended to go for the musician or artist or writer over the pretty-boy jock.



chatterbox24 -> RE: How much merit do you put in a picture? (3/21/2013 10:25:16 AM)

CHemistry is such a weird thing or physical attraction.

LOng time ago I had a BF who I thought was magnificient! TO me he was, but my sister said to me yrs later "GOd that guy was ugly!" hahahha.




Dyfrynt -> RE: How much merit do you put in a picture? (3/21/2013 10:29:17 AM)

I try not to put too much emphasis on a picture. Some people do not photograph well! I'm not going to pretend that looks aren't important to me. It is, however, but one of many criteria that I pay attention to. The whole package has to be there for me to be interested.

Looks alone would never cut it with me. Don't care if she looks like a goddess if she is also full of herself, expects to be spoiled, doted upon, etc.



subinsilicon -> RE: How much merit do you put in a picture? (3/21/2013 10:34:23 AM)

Most of the best pics are fakes if you look them up in a reverse image search.

Assuming you negate those, then I find the pictures useful to weed out people I would not wish to be with.

Then, at that point, the picture is just an idea, like so many words, to start a relationship from.



AthenaSurrenders -> RE: How much merit do you put in a picture? (3/21/2013 11:12:43 AM)

I'm not looking but from past experiences:

My now-husband's photos were kinda crappy - he's just not photogenic, always feels a bit awkward posing or flashing a smile for the camera. He wasn't unattractive, but in the photos he was just Mr Average, blend into the background. In person, when I can see his reactions and expressions, when he's relaxed and when his smile is genuine - that did it for me. So I wouldn't dismiss someone based on their photo. I do think physical attraction has a role to play, I just don't think a photo gives you much more than an idea of what the person looks like.

Then again, I do consider photos a valuable tool because they often give a lot of clues about the person. Where it was taken, their pose, their expression, their clothes - they all tell you something about the type of person they are and what they prioritize. For example, no matter how gorgeous a guy might be, if his photos show a filthy living environment, are all vain mirror shots/cock shots, all seem to have a beer in his hand - he's not likely to be a match for me. On the other hand, if he's playing a musical instrument or a sport, or has a range of photos all taken in different places, it will spark an interest. A lot of it comes down to effort too - if you can't be bothered to change out of your stained sweatsuit for your dating profile photo I'm not convinced you will make a big effort in other areas.



slaveboihere -> RE: How much merit do you put in a picture? (3/21/2013 3:15:03 PM)

Photo's are a help, no more. As has been said above, its just a part of helping you put together something of the whole package. And a nice package is always appealing.....I do find it offputting when someone has no photo at all on their profile; or if its a cartoon image or something. But its true that people are more or less photogenic; I don't come out spectacularly well in pics myself - I mean, in person, I'm just drop dead gorgeous........well, I think so........So if its a nice pic, and not one stolen from some model's site, it may well attract me. But wether I want to pursue anything will depend on what the profile says and how it says it too.



JeffBC -> RE: How much merit do you put in a picture? (3/21/2013 3:47:15 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: chatterbox24
I am very curious about people's experiences or how much clout they put into things.

I would not feel any sort of chemistry for a photo. Body type would be something which gets a veto vote if I find it unappealing but can never got a "yes" vote. It's the human inside the skin that would attract me. Overall when I'm evaluating a partner I look at a wide variety of characteristics and whoever the prospective is must get a passing grade in all of them.



Rochsub2009 -> RE: How much merit do you put in a picture? (3/21/2013 3:48:30 PM)

Like most guys, looks are important to me. But looks aren't everything.

Regardless of how beautiful a woman may be, if she's dumb as a bag of rocks, then I'm not going to be interested. I've never been one of those guys who can date a beautiful bimbo simply because she looks good on my arms. I'd much rather date a woman with average looks who stimulates me intellectually, than date a beautiful woman who only stimulates my loins.



HarryVanWinkle -> RE: How much merit do you put in a picture? (3/21/2013 3:55:57 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Dyfrynt

I try not to put too much emphasis on a picture. Some people do not photograph well! I'm not going to pretend that looks aren't important to me. It is, however, but one of many criteria that I pay attention to. The whole package has to be there for me to be interested.



This is a great point. I can think of a woman I've met several times. In person, her eyes are hypnotically beautiful. In photographs, they look kind of creepy to me.



kalikshama -> RE: How much merit do you put in a picture? (3/21/2013 4:11:05 PM)

While I am also far more attracted to brains and talent than faces and bodies, I do want to see a picture, and I keep in mind that several people have been more attractive than their picture and some used pictures that were 10-15 years old and/or minus 50#.

When my profile was active, I noted that I was at a different weight than in my pictures and that current ones were available.



LPslittleclip -> RE: How much merit do you put in a picture? (3/21/2013 4:21:58 PM)

a picture is a moment in time and only gives a glimpse of the person now how the person is. i don't rule someone out just on looks. i base it more on how the person is and how they interact with me. i like those who have a open mind and willing to exchange ideas



TieMeInKnottss -> RE: How much merit do you put in a picture? (3/21/2013 5:43:22 PM)

I am very visual. I like to know what people look like that I "speak with"...From a romantic angle, I admit to having a specific type of physical look that I find attractive. The thing is, with online dating, you have hundreds of people to choose from. Go on OK Cupid or POF...almost EVERY profile (at least in my geographic region & age range) is identical..every man is easy going, laid back, hates drama, loves the gym & the outdoors... You have to narrow things down so you look at who you think you would find attractive... Now, that is NOT to say that once you email a couple of times you won't realize there is no common interest or intellectual attraction. In person, it is different, you interact & meet people you get to know them as a 3D person..attraction can grow or be lost..



kdsub -> RE: How much merit do you put in a picture? (3/21/2013 7:00:17 PM)

To me it depends on what I am looking for. It may be friendship… or intellectual stimulation…or competition… or sexual companionship. Each of these will obviously require different attributes.

Photos would only come onto play with me in sexual companionship. I look for a certain type of build in a women for sex. It is my preference only and not a judgment on anyone.

Build is not the only attribute of course but it is the first thing I look at...so yes in this circumstance photos are very important.

Butch



seekingreality -> RE: How much merit do you put in a picture? (3/21/2013 11:32:20 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: chatterbox24

I am very curious about people's experiences or how much clout they put into things.

If you saw someones picture or even cam and didnt feel instant chemistry, would that affect you meeting them if you liked them in every other single way?

I know in the past, if I didnt feel that physical attraction from the look, it just didnt work out. I am curious to learn if anyone felt like that but after meeting the person it changed?

P.S. NO, I am not looking for anyone.





If I look at someone's photo and clearly can tell I am not and will never be physically attracted to them, I don't see a point in meeting. If that is unclear to me, I might give them the benefit of the doubt and meet them. But I should also add I don't buy the concept of "liking them in every other single way" based on online or phone interactions only. I take all that stuff with a grain of salt and realize that nothing really starts to matter until you meet. You can exchange a lot of great emails and talk on the phone for hours, and then have zero chemistry when you meet



Muttling -> RE: How much merit do you put in a picture? (3/21/2013 11:58:16 PM)

Before I found Miss (who is now my wife), I spent a while searching. Met lots of women with lots of different looks and personalities. I used to say in my profile "looks unimportant", but I found that to be not entirely true. Looks do play a part, but not nearly as big a part as whether or not our personalities click.



absolutchocolat -> RE: How much merit do you put in a picture? (3/22/2013 1:49:18 AM)

My face always looks puffy in pics unless I take it myself, so I give people a pass on crappy pics. Recently, I went on a date with a guy from FL and his pics suuuuuuucked...but goddamn if that bastard didn't make my panties moist in person! [;)]



Lucylastic -> RE: How much merit do you put in a picture? (3/22/2013 1:54:58 AM)

Ive always hated pictures of myself, but since my face is noticeably paralysed on one side, I hate them even more....it doesnt mirror my mind, my thoughts, my personality. It shows the outside... but on the positive side... those who know me, see past the mask, if they cant, I dont need them in my life anyway.



chatterbox24 -> RE: How much merit do you put in a picture? (3/22/2013 6:21:12 AM)

I don't know about anyone else but I know from past experiences, I have talked to really good people, and wanted to like them physically too!!!! Even tried too, cause inside they were really great. I even went as far as to meet them to make sure. Cause I think people do take bad pictures sometimes or their mannerisms are attractive in person so it helps with physical attracton.
THe WOW factor is exciting when you have that appeal for someone. But I do think to much emphasize can be put on it, and people will actually stay to keep that feeling, even with an asshat when someone else who doesnt have the WOW factor is actually a much better fit.

FInding that dynamic duo of personality and physical appeal can be quite a search.



Esinn -> RE: How much merit do you put in a picture? (3/22/2013 6:26:15 AM)

I can not put merit into photographs. Have you seen mine?



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