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RE: Kinky sex really? - 3/31/2013 7:07:59 PM

littlewonder

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we're M/s. Most of the time it's just regular, normal sex...no kink involved. There are times when kink is involved....but we're always M/s...he has the last word, he makes the decisions, etc....

We live a life like any other normal couple, vanilla sex included. It's pretty typical.

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RE: Kinky sex really? - 4/1/2013 4:08:03 PM

lilcracker

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quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

However, I do think most of us get started through sex. You don't look at a hot guy across the room and think "hmm, bet it would be awesome to have him write me out a chore list". Instead we think "man, if he only knew his way with a bag of rope".

Sex is a primal drive hard wired into us. For those of us that are kinky, of course we're going to first think of this. And control later.

first thanks everyone for all the responses :) And Des your reply is exactly what I was thinking. Because it happened differently in this relationship and the fact that it is very vanilla based made me wonder if I was alone.

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RE: Kinky sex really? - 4/1/2013 4:24:59 PM

MrRodgers

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Absolutely !!

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RE: Kinky sex really? - 4/1/2013 5:07:31 PM

theshytype

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I'm sure you're not the only one.

For myself, I like a healthy mix. Of everything. I like variety. Totally kink-free to me would be the same as someone always just wanting kinky sex. I don't do it because it's expected, I do it because we like it. I've always started in vanilla relationships with dominant personalities and always slowly introduced my kinks once I became more comfortable. Thankfully, the one that made it long enough (my husband) totally supports my kinky side.

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RE: Kinky sex really? - 4/1/2013 9:25:28 PM

GotSteel

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quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl
You can engage in BDSM and never engage in D/s.

I'm going to contest this. If you're doing BDSM you are doing D/s. D/s is there in the acronym.

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RE: Kinky sex really? - 4/1/2013 11:06:04 PM

ARIES83

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Hmm, I'm not sure thats right...
I'll have to google it.

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RE: Kinky sex really? - 4/2/2013 4:07:02 AM

SinFix

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It stands for bondage/discipline/sado-mashochism.. it wasn't until more recent years people added in the D/s as well...

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RE: Kinky sex really? - 4/2/2013 8:19:41 AM

ResidentSadist

Posts: 12580
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From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
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^ Give her a cookie. That is exactly what it stands for.

That son of bitch fake Master from Castle Realm with the 14 sock puppets he would reply to his own OPs with, several of which were supposed his slaves but he actually had NO real life slaves . . . he was the first mother fucker that started that bullshit by saying D/s was part of the BDSM acronym.

A 4 letter acronym does not stand for 6 words, do the fucking math. Those damn insecure hetro wannabees that are looking for "one true way" and a book, slogan and flag to bolster claims they are doing it "the right way" all jumped in line to bastardize the BDSM acronym in an effort to steal the substance and history of the gays that started the leather scene. The leathermen started it. Hetro's were invited in by good grace in the spirit of pansexuality. They can't have BDSM and it's rich history. They get D/s and that's it. All the hetro BDSMers should burn their copies of 50 Shades of Grey in from of the local gay bar before going inside to buy a round of drinks for the house in gratitude for the gays who died and were jailed fighting that long hard violent battle to bring the leather aspect of their sexual out into public.

This shit makes me so mad. I petitioned Wikipedia to fix their errant entry. Fucking idiots piss me off.

< Message edited by ResidentSadist -- 4/2/2013 8:20:33 AM >

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RE: Kinky sex really? - 4/2/2013 8:23:10 AM

LadyPact

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quote:

ORIGINAL: ResidentSadist

^ Give her a cookie. That is exactly what it stands for.

That son of bitch fake Master from Castle Realm with the 14 sock puppets he would reply to his own OPs with, several of which were supposed his slaves but he actually had NO real life slaves . . . he was the first mother fucker that started that bullshit by saying D/s was part of the BDSM acronym.

A 4 letter acronym does not stand for 6 words, do the fucking math. Those damn insecure hetro wannabees that are looking for "one true way" and a book, slogan and flag to bolster claims they are doing it "the right way" all jumped in line to bastardize the BDSM acronym in an effort to steal the substance and history of the gays that started the leather scene. The leathermen started it. Hetro's were invited in by good grace in the spirit of pansexuality. They can't have BDSM and it's rich history. They get D/s and that's it. All the hetro BDSMers should burn their copies of 50 Shades of Grey in from of the local gay bar before going inside to buy a round of drinks for the house in gratitude for the gays who died and were jailed fighting that long hard violent battle to bring the leather aspect of their sexual out into public.

This shit makes me so mad. I petitioned Wikipedia to fix their errant entry. Fucking idiots piss me off.

If you were here, I'd kiss you right on the lips.

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RE: Kinky sex really? - 4/3/2013 6:17:22 AM

LizDeluxe

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quote:

ORIGINAL: lilcracker
If you engage in kinky sex do you do so because it's expected?

I engage in it because I like it.

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RE: Kinky sex really? - 4/3/2013 7:50:19 AM

EligibleOwner

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Joined: 10/16/2009
From: London
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I'm really interested in the OP's reference to "missionary" sex.

I think "kinky sex" means different things to different people, and something that interests me is the way a couple can get quite kinky, in the sense of developing a fascination, about what might seem to some to be a boringly old-fashioned and vanilla sex life. I think there are some submissive women in particular who are quite passive and traditionally minded about sex, and who like it to be old-fashioned and simple.

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RE: Kinky sex really? - 4/3/2013 8:02:29 AM

JeffBC

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quote:

ORIGINAL: SinFix
It stands for bondage/discipline/sado-mashochism.. it wasn't until more recent years people added in the D/s as well...

... and it just plain makes sense from a practical standpoint. In point of practice saying Carol & I are into "BDSM" is wonderfully inclusive and all that but it doesn't capture the reality... we don't go to play parties and the like because there's no draw for us. In point of fact we don't attend ANY BDSM events because they are pretty much all focused on whips & chains.

In pragmatic reality saying "D/s" is related to but not the same as BDSM seems to make sense.

quote:

ORIGINAL: EligibileOwner
I'm really interested in the OP's reference to "missionary" sex.

Heh, "missionary sex" is one of my favorite vanilla topics largely because I know what image people get in their head when I say "Carol and I prefer missionary sex". I also understand the reality of the event. Generally I'm guessing those two things are very different. The actual position of missionary sex leaves a lot of room for... uh... creative interpretation. I generally assume "kinky" means some sort of "whips & chains" when I'm talking on a BDSM site. BDSM, of course, is simply one tiny little slice of human kinkiness.

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