NCBJ

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

NCBJ

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Casual Banter] >> Off the Grid >> NCBJ

Page: [1]

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

NCBJ - 4/3/2013 2:05:19 PM

Missokyst

Posts: 6041
Joined: 9/9/2006
Status: offline

I wanted to write this down because it is still fresh in my mind and I may eventually include it in other writing. I chose to post it in this forum because it really isn't BDSM, though it does have to do with my naturally submissive nature.

I wonder how many of you have had your head shoved down on a cock, while your mind is not into the game? My first non consentual BJ occured at the end of a date when I was about 22. I wouldn't have fucked him, or taken him back to my place, and I did turn down his offer for an after date "coffee" at his place.

At that point in my life I had never even given a full out BJ. The closest thing to it for me had been licking up the sides of my husbands cock to provide slickness for a handjob while I was in the hospital after I gave birth to our daughter. But I never went down on it, never let him fuck my mouth or spew between my lips. I was still somewhat sexually inexperienced after my divorce and not yet accustomed to the wild times of the early 70's bar scene.

So it was a bit of a shock to me to find my head shoved down to a lap after what I considered was only going to be a goodnight kiss in the car. Manny seemed to take it as a given. I protested but that didn't hold much weight with my date. My head was down, his zipper was open and though I tried to keep my lips closed a quick slap made me open up. Not mentally, just physically. I gave my first real BJ to a guy that meant nothing to me.. no, that meant less than nothing after our date. All I could think of was getting it over and getting gone.

I posted this over on Fet earlier and was quite surprised to get a comment from the other side of the sexes. A very nice gentleman replied that his first BJ was also a bit of a surprise and led up to his first PnV encounter. His experience was unexpected but not distasteful. Mine on the other hand just led to my becoming less inclined to dating.

Do you recall your first BJ? Was it expected? Was that all that happened or did it lead to more?

_____________________________

pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding ~Gibran, Kahlil

“The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth suffering for.”
― Bob Marley

Profile

Post #: 1

RE: NCBJ - 4/3/2013 2:23:56 PM

searching4mysir

Posts: 2757
Joined: 6/16/2011
Status: offline

quote:

My head was down, his zipper was open and though I tried to keep my lips closed a quick slap made me open up.

I would have bitten him. HARD.

Unless you agree to a consent/nonconsent relationship, what he did is sexual assault. Since you had already declined his overatures, I'm guessing you didn't have that kind of relationship.

< Message edited by searching4mysir -- 4/3/2013 2:25:22 PM >

_____________________________

No longer searching -- found my one and only right here on CM

(in reply to Missokyst)

Profile

Post #: 2

RE: NCBJ - 4/3/2013 2:29:40 PM

Missokyst

Posts: 6041
Joined: 9/9/2006
Status: offline

Oh I recognize that, now, but it took me many years and long bouts of celibacy to come to that point. Biting was never an option. Still, I was very surprised that a man might be subject to a non consensual BJ. At 58, I am floored by this knowlege.

_____________________________

pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding ~Gibran, Kahlil

“The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth suffering for.”
― Bob Marley

(in reply to searching4mysir)

Profile

Post #: 3

RE: NCBJ - 4/3/2013 3:15:34 PM

BlkTallFullfig

Posts: 5585
Joined: 6/25/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: searching4mysir
I would have bitten him. HARD.

Unless you agree to a consent/nonconsent relationship, what he did is sexual assault. Since you had already declined his overatures, I'm guessing you didn't have that kind of relationship.

This was my thought, and I know you Missokyst
didn't write this down to make anyone feel a certain way, but it make me sad. M

_____________________________

a.k.a. SexyBossyBBW
""Touching was, and still is, and will always be, the true revolution" Nikki Giovanni

(in reply to searching4mysir)

Profile

Post #: 4

RE: NCBJ - 4/3/2013 5:47:06 PM

FrostedFlake

Posts: 3084
Joined: 3/4/2009
From: Centralia, Washington
Status: offline

Assault. Rather than assume you thought you would be hurt more if you resisted, I will point out that you left that part out.

Back up, try it again. Finish what you are saying. It doesn't belong hidden inside, making you work around it. Get it out.

_____________________________

Frosted Flake
simul justus et peccator
Einen Liebhaber, und halten Sie die Schraube

"... evil (and hilarious) !!" Hlen5

(in reply to BlkTallFullfig)

Profile

Post #: 5

RE: NCBJ - 4/3/2013 6:14:44 PM

agent0fchaos

Posts: 34
Joined: 1/31/2013
Status: offline

Thought better of this comment.

Suffice it to say, people that think they deserve things are assholes.

< Message edited by agent0fchaos -- 4/3/2013 6:26:23 PM >

(in reply to FrostedFlake)

Profile

Post #: 6

RE: NCBJ - 4/3/2013 6:18:29 PM

slaveluci

Posts: 4294
Joined: 3/2/2007
From: Little Rock, AR
Status: offline

Ah yes, my first BJ. It was a very pleasant experience. It was the night of my high school graduation and I was a month shy of 18. I lost my virginity that night to a 34 yr. old guy I had been crushing on forever. He was a friend of my neighbors and knew how hot I was for him. He attended my graduation with my neighbors/friends and, that night, came to my wild-ass graduation keg party. Before he popped my cherry, I sucked a cock for the first time. I was afraid that he'd come in my mouth and I wouldn't be able to handle it and I told him so. He made sure to pull out just in time

We were a fling over that summer and then I went off to college and met others. I love sucking cock and have been told I'm the best at it by several experienced men who should know. I've loved it from the start

luci

Edited to add: I forgot to include that a couple years prior to this, there was a guy I had a crush on that I went to school with. We were making out in the back of a jeep and he was desperately trying to get me to give him a blowjob, pushing my head down and insisting. I would not give in and he finally gave up. He wasn't violent about it at all, just hoping I'd give in. After I finally did it a couple of years later, I regretted not having done it for him. I guess I was just too nervous and afraid I couldn't handle it if he came in my mouth.

< Message edited by slaveluci -- 4/3/2013 6:21:33 PM >

_____________________________

To choose a good book, look in an inquisitor’s prohibited list. ~John Aikin

(in reply to Missokyst)

Profile

Post #: 7

RE: NCBJ - 4/3/2013 6:26:37 PM

playfulotter

Posts: 2195
Joined: 6/27/2005
Status: offline

I have always thought a BJ was just a prerequisite (forced or not) when a man and a woman have sex but I did have sex before that first time....but maybe I have never truly thought I was being forced or if I was I liked the forcing...but for someone who has a different outlook I can see where it could be traumatizing or a shock to them.

I remember the first time I did that and it was a bit forced and not expected, but I just thought of it as not wanting to do anything wrong doing that the first time so I did it and actually it was a person I really didn't care if I pleased or not looking back on it.

It was when I was 17 years old and it happened at a drive-in movie.

_____________________________

We are all born ignorant, but one must work hard to remain stupid.” ― Benjamin Franklin

"Some people are otters, some people are rocks." ~Sheldon Cooper

(in reply to Missokyst)

Profile

Post #: 8

RE: NCBJ - 4/3/2013 8:10:10 PM

Missokyst

Posts: 6041
Joined: 9/9/2006
Status: offline

I guess it is safe to say I was pretty much of a prude or what they used to refer to as being a lady. I know my friends were having sex long before I, chatting about it, discussing activity in depth, while I (even thou I was raped very young) did not know what a penis looked like. I spoke a good game though, people assumed I was experienced. Once I was married of course, those things changed. Still, I would not let my husband do that to me because I knew he was fucking other women and my mouth was not going there! Beats me why licking the sides seemed acceptable. But I KNEW him. I was married to him. The other guy I just assumed would be a dinner date with dancing.
It occurs to me that perhaps some men think it is part of the evening. I guess that is why I did not view that as rape even though I did not wish it. It lacked the blood.

_____________________________

pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding ~Gibran, Kahlil

“The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth suffering for.”
― Bob Marley

(in reply to playfulotter)

Profile

Post #: 9