IronBear
Posts: 9008
Joined: 6/19/2005
From: Beenleigh, Qld, Australia
Status: offline
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This was emailed to me by a friend....
HAZARDOUS MATERIALS INFO SYSTEMS
Material Safety Data Sheet
Women-Chemicals Analysis
Element: Woman.
Symbol: WO2.
Discoverer: Adam.
Atomic Mass: Accepted as 110lbs but known to vary from 100 to 550 pounds.
Occurrence: Copious quantities in all urban areas.
Physical properties:
1. Surface usually covered with painted film.
2. Boils at nothing, freezes witout reason.
3. Melts if given special treatment.
4. Bitter if incorrectly used.
5. Found in various states ranging from virgin metal to common ore.
6. Yeilds to pressure if applied to correct points.
Chemical Properties:
1. Has great affinity for gold, silver, platinum and precious stones.
2 . Absorbs great quantities of expensive substances.
3. May explode spontaneously, without prior warning and for no known reason.
4. Insoluable in liquids, but activity greatly increased by saturation in alcohol.
5. Most powerful money reducing agent known to man.
Common Uses:
1. Highly ornamental, especially in sports cars.
2. Can be a great aid to relaxation.
Tests:
1. Pure specimans turn rosy pink when discovered in natural state.
2. Turns green when placed beside a better speciman.
Hazards:
1. Highly dangerous except in experienced hands.
2. Illegal to posses more than one.
_____________________________
Iron Bear
Master of Bruin Cottage
http://www.bruincottage.org
Your attitude, words & actions are yours. Take responsibility for them and the consequences they incur.
D.I.L.L.I.G.A.F.
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