RE: How can one become a better submissive?

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RE: How can one become a better submissive? - 5/24/2013 9:15:39 PM

MaamJay

Posts: 2101
Joined: 9/2/2005
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We usually give the answer that it depends on the Dominant. But wow, Lady Pact's 5 are absolutely awesome general advice to subs, which should set them up to then find out the particulars of how their Dominant wants to be served. Thanks LP, with all that has been going on for You recently, that is amazing wisdom. I think that post should go up into the FAQs!

My sub side has been struggling a bit lately with the fact that at the moment, in terms of physical things, Master is serving me more than i am serving Him. He is doing the laundry, the shopping, makes my lunch every day, the pet care, the occasional cleaning (Not His strong point) and even some of the cooking as my back has been bad. OK i am working full time and earning the $$ but somehow that doesn't feel like enough. So reminding myself of the fact that there are no external measures of subby-ness is a good thing!

Maam Jay aka violet[A]

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RE: How can one become a better submissive? - 5/25/2013 11:24:32 AM

Charles6682

Posts: 1820
Joined: 10/1/2007
From: Saint Pete,FL
Status: offline

A lot of LadyPacts advice I have found quite useful.Not just as a sub but as a human being first.After all,first and foremost,be a good human.Seems pretty simple to me.I got the answer I was looking for thanks to LadyPact.I think as a sub,it is good to see what a experienced,respected Domme advice is.I was looking for a basic,simple guide.LadyPact,you could write a book!How to be a better human!

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RE: How can one become a better submissive? - 5/25/2013 5:52:24 PM

Charles6682

Posts: 1820
Joined: 10/1/2007
From: Saint Pete,FL
Status: offline

This is the new official guide to being a better submissive. Courtesy of LadyPact

1. First and foremost, be a good human being. Don't lie, don't cheat, don't steal, don't be an unproductive member of society, don't be untrustworthy..... No, I probably don't have to tell you that but consider for a moment how many people list some of those very reasons for why their last dynamic ended.

2. Learn how to have healthy relationships. This goes for everything from being dedicated to healthy communication to avoiding things like emotional blackmail and manipulative tactics. Start looking at the other relationships that you have in your life. Friends, family, co-workers, etc. Take a deep look and examine how healthy they are and if they aren't, do you have a role to play in that? Work on any areas that might need improvement.

3. Don't be A submissive. Be HER submissive. Fit your submission to her personally. If she likes leather toys and outfits, learn about leather care. If she likes baseball, be willing to talk to her about it or learn about the sport. Ask her how she would best appreciate your submission/service and do those things. Here's the other side of this. Don't serve her ( ) by taking away the things that she likes to do. If she likes to do her own gardening, don't decide you're "helping" her by doing it for her. Then, you are taking joy out of her life, rather than bringing joy into it.

4. Remember that her world is not entirely about you. Your submission should be a positive thing in her life, but not the only thing. She has friends, family, hobbies, personal time that she just wants quiet, etc. This is the difference between submission and smothering.

5. Keep the reverse as well. Have hobbies, interests, and friends of your own. This makes you a more well rounded human being and therefore, a greater benefit to her. Have you ever noticed how many threads we have where women say they don't want to have to carry the whole conversation? This is a part of that. Be interesting! Have things to contribute when you are talking.

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RE: How can one become a better submissive? - 5/30/2013 6:15:54 PM

SnowRanger

Posts: 503
Joined: 5/25/2008
From: Sinsinnati
Status: offline

Hello A/all,

Truly Lady Pact is a woman of wisdom, insight and a gift of expressing both. I would also like to add:
Dont Get Complacent.

Continue to Pay Attention.

Do NOT Forget What She Wants.

I stumbled accross my one time Mistress' profile recently and there in her first sentence was everything I failed to do. It was more than a bit painful to read.

Respectfully,
Mike
snowRanger

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You can't help where you were born; and, you may not have much to say about where you die; but, you can and you should try to pass the days in between as a good man.
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Post #: 24