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LafayetteLady -> RE: Motivation (5/23/2013 9:38:48 PM)
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ORIGINAL: Kinkypupper
I screwed up by not giving her daily or even weekly canines and paddlings.
How do you think that would have helped things? Was that what the two of you agreed to, or is that just what you think is happening?
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I started being more concerned for her health and well being. It's changed into a marriage of tolerance than a M/s relationship.
Gotta tell you, this is a major part of your marital problems, and your personal issue right here. You screwed up because you cared about her? What planet do you live on where you think that being M/s means you don't care about someone. By the way, if you didn't care about her health and well being, why the hell did you marry her?
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The collar came off due to her asthma. And has not been on since.
Here's a hint for you. The collar is off, she isn't your slave OR your submissive anymore. She is your WIFE. Perhaps when you figure that out, you can start fixing the problem.
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For her there is now a fine line between abuse and punnishment/play.
I am more worried about loosing her if I let loose my sadistic side.
Well, duh. She isn't anything more than your wife anymore, so anything you do that she isn't enjoying IS abuse. Consent left with the collar.
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ORIGINAL: Kinkypupper
That's part of the problem.. I do those things. This morning I woke at 0615 knowing she came to bed after midnight.( after I told her to come to bed now.) I let. Her sleep in. I drank reheated coffee I made my own lunch. I let the dog out and fed the horses.
For fuck's sake, are you really not able to make a fresh pot of coffee for yourself? Do you really think that we should take some pity on you because you had to get up and make your own lunch?
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She slept it tell? I just spoke to her. When I left I woke her said I was leaving for work and to put the books in the bookshelf. When I spoke with her 15 min ago there was no comment about the books, she had just came in from working in the greenhouse. So
When I get home if I say something she will say I was in the greenhouse ( which is a priority) or that her finger still hurt or or or.. And the books sit..
If the books being put back on the shelf mean that much to you, put them back yourself. You keep missing the fact that you are no longer in a position to order her to put the books back, come to bed, get up and make you fresh coffee and your lunch.
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If I spank her ass for not obeying the retort will come out that" fine do you feel better and all dommly now" If I slap her face I will get the " I am leaving and suing your ass for abuse" threat... S I walk in bite my tongue....
Again, the collar came off, and there is no more "obeying" required. She is having some mental health issues, and your way of handling it is to spank her or slap her in the face?
Honestly, she SHOULD leave you. You are so confused about what being a dominant or a master is, it isn't even funny. You don't really care about this woman, you just want someone to make you coffee and clean up after you. You not only aren't a "master," you sound like a shitty husband and a sorry excuse for a man.
You have one excuse after another, and yet, when you went into detail, it turns out, that you hold a LOT of responsibility for your situation and it isn't because you didn't apply corporal punishment on a daily basis.
You have two choices now. Either sit down with your WIFE and have a talk as EQUALS about what you BOTH can do to save your marriage, or file for divorce. Whining about having to reheat your coffee makes you look like an asshat, and quite frankly, it seems with everything else you said, you are one.
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