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Husband likes me to be with another - 5/28/2013 7:48:39 AM   
AngelicScorpio


Posts: 10
Joined: 5/25/2013
Status: offline 		Anyone have experience with a spouse that likes the other to be with someone else? I am married, husband gets off on me being with someone else. We've done it with a close friend, who I am still close friends and it was fine. however, that was not long term. It was a few times, however. I hear so often that it ruins marriages, but if we are both getting a need met... sounds okay to me.

Anyone with long term experience?
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RE: Husband likes me to be with another - 5/28/2013 8:19:23 AM   
LizDeluxe


Posts: 687
Joined: 10/2/2011
Status: offline 		I would say that as long as everyone is happy with the situation then it is fine. It doesn't always ruin every marriage. Sometimes people fantasize about it and then when they face it in reality they realize that they are in a little over their head. That often causes problems. This is just my opinion but any time you open up a previously closed loop monogamous relationship to other people you create the possibility that one (or both) of the parties may meet someone else who is just a better fit for them than their original partner. It happens. As long as it works for everyone involved and you can keep it together.... everything is fine.


(in reply to AngelicScorpio)
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RE: Husband likes me to be with another - 5/28/2013 8:30:21 AM   
SwitchNSpanky


Posts: 418
Joined: 5/28/2013
Status: offline 		I did this with my last long term Girl. We shared partners with another couple and my best friends. It's much easier if the dynamic stays "us using our friends for fun. Us two as a team. Fulfilling each others fantasies. After the scene do a "team debriefing" of scene. Stay a team. Despite the outward power dynamic...

(in reply to LizDeluxe)
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RE: Husband likes me to be with another - 5/28/2013 8:36:28 AM   
AngelicScorpio


Posts: 10
Joined: 5/25/2013
Status: offline 		Oh a debriefing is good. We sorta did that the other times, but not as in detail as it could have been. I'll have to add that. Thanks!

(in reply to SwitchNSpanky)
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RE: Husband likes me to be with another - 5/28/2013 8:38:54 AM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: AngelicScorpio
I hear so often that it ruins marriages, but if we are both getting a need met... sounds okay to me.

Anyone with long term experience?


A couple of my views:

First, as long as everyone is on board and everyone feels secure, it can work and actually work very well.

Second, I long ago came to the conclusion that sex is not love or intimacy. For someone that does not share that view, engaging in sex with someone other than your spouse (even with consent) can be difficult and relationship ending.

You've already made it past one hurdle, because you've already done this with a friend. A lot of times, people will think it's a super hot fantasy and when it actually happens, the reality causes them to react badly.


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Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

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RE: Husband likes me to be with another - 5/28/2013 10:25:46 AM   
AngelicScorpio


Posts: 10
Joined: 5/25/2013
Status: offline 		Yes, and our friends are into this as well, and his wife actually really helped me a lot with it. Hearing her tell me to fuck her husband was a bit of a turn on. It's not something on-going and he does not wish to Dom anyone other than his wife right now, so I'm looking. :) It's been just about a year with a handful of encounters, so I think its safe to say that my husband and I are going to be okay... but you never know. Our friends are known and safe, etc. Always up for learning something new or something I have not thought of.

(in reply to OsideGirl)
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RE: Husband likes me to be with another - 5/28/2013 11:30:32 AM   
theshytype


Posts: 1600
Status: offline 		I've never done it so I cannot offer up any success story.
Some reasons why they may negatively affect a marriage may include jealousy, increased feelings toward a play partner, or one person may no longer be interested in swapping whereas the other wants to continue. To me, it always seems as though most of those marriages were not that strong to begin with. They either already lacked in communication or excitement and playing outside of the marriage just compounded existing issues.
If you have a strong foundation, great communication, and you're both having fun, I don't see it being impossible to have a successful marriage.

(in reply to AngelicScorpio)
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RE: Husband likes me to be with another - 5/28/2013 11:48:55 AM   
Rasciallymisty


Posts: 5749
Joined: 4/16/2012
Status: offline 		Did it ....done it...won't ever do it again. Brad always wanted me to do so but I did not like doing it. When he got sick and still begged me to do so I finally told him no more. He never got that I only wanted him. His friend and I are still good friends but its sometimes is wierd because he has a great g/f that knows nothing of what happen and neither of us will ever tell....but we both still know that it did.

Like the others that have said ....as long as all are on board go for it, be happy and have fun.

misty

(in reply to AngelicScorpio)
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RE: Husband likes me to be with another - 5/28/2013 4:18:54 PM   
SubvsSlave


Posts: 201
Joined: 4/6/2011
Status: offline 		While I can't offer any practical advice, I had to chuckle when I saw this post. This weekend Master and I were talking about the subject of having another girl possibly join us, nothing serious, first talks and all...and then later last night we were poking around on Netflix when we stumbled across this movie, "The Sex Monster", starring Mariel Hemingway. The movie is hilarious and is about the husband wanting his wife to have a threesome with another woman and then the chain of events after his wish comes true. We both really enjoyed the movie.

(in reply to Rasciallymisty)
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RE: Husband likes me to be with another - 5/28/2013 4:41:38 PM   
RedMagic1


Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: AngelicScorpio
Anyone with long term experience?

The relationship I'm most familiar with that had a heavy cuckold fantasy fulfillment in it was the marriage of a friend, and acting out the fantasy caused the marriage to fall apart, years later. The (ex) wife was my friend, and she said she never really got over it. She used "we have kids now" as an excuse to refuse any more threesomes, but really it was because she lost respect for her husband every time they did the cuck thing.

When these boards were more active, I once asked if anyone had direct personal experience of success. One lady who knows a lot of very kinky people said that she only knows 2 couples, out of everyone she's ever met, who she could say have a successful cuckold relationship. So the odds seem long.

_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to AngelicScorpio)
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RE: Husband likes me to be with another - 5/28/2013 5:41:21 PM   
NiceButMeanGirl


Posts: 2756
Joined: 11/4/2011
From: Bellingham, WA U.S.A.
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: AngelicScorpio
Anyone have experience with a spouse that likes the other to be with someone else?

Not that actually but, when I was married, HE liked being with others withOUT telling me about it.

NBMG

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I'm now SweetlySadistic1 on CollarSpace. NBMG is an old profile, please see my new one.


(in reply to AngelicScorpio)
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RE: Husband likes me to be with another - 5/29/2013 8:39:11 PM   
LookieNoNookie


Posts: 12216
Joined: 8/9/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: AngelicScorpio

Anyone have experience with a spouse that likes the other to be with someone else? I am married, husband gets off on me being with someone else. We've done it with a close friend, who I am still close friends and it was fine. however, that was not long term. It was a few times, however. I hear so often that it ruins marriages, but if we are both getting a need met... sounds okay to me.

Anyone with long term experience?


Ain't a damn thing wrong with this shit.

It's what you do with it.

(in reply to AngelicScorpio)
Profile   Post #: 12
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