The point of profiles? (Full Version)

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NorthernPhoenix -> The point of profiles? (11/11/2004 6:33:09 PM)

As time goes on, I am seeing less and less point in profiles really. Bear in mind that this is from a male sub, aka someone who's profile likely won't get responded to, so there is a bias in my writing... Although I'd say that other 'groups' suffer also - Dommes getting mailed by loads of guys regardless of their profile, ditto femsubs (I guess anyway).....

Do people put too much emphasis on trying to sell themselves in a couple of short paragraphs? Especially with sites with extensive message boards, or weblogging areas... Places that people can talk or express themselves more fully.

This isn't a 'why isn't my ad getting responded to' rant.. I'm over that already! If I could encourage everyone here to talk to people... Through forums, weblogs, going to munches and clubs then I would.. But since adverts are such a prevalent thing in the BDSM world then we seem stuck with them perhaps.

Any thoughts on this topic at all?

Phoenix




MistressFire70 -> RE: The point of profiles? (11/11/2004 6:53:58 PM)

I agree with a lot of what you're saying especially since I’m one of the Ladies that gets email without regard to my EXTENSIVE profile. However, one of the things I’ve learned (and occasionally have to remind myself) is that we cannot force people to do what we think they should. You and I and most everyone else that has ventured outside “profile land” are interested in learning and discovering and improving. Not everyone has this interest and to expect them to have it is, in my eyes, giving most of them more credit than they deserve. Although, I will entertain the idea that some don’t honestly realize that there IS something beyond profile land.

Or, I could just be full of it. Take your pick! [:D]

Fire




MiladyElaine -> RE: The point of profiles? (11/11/2004 9:33:28 PM)

I for one am not a "people person" and don't like crowds.




LadySonelle -> RE: The point of profiles? (11/11/2004 9:43:39 PM)

Profiles can be useful. When a sub contacts Me I check out the profile. As to folks responding even when My profile indicates I'm 1,000 miles from them, etc... *shrug* who knows, they might work out or might not. I consider it a compliment.

One line requests... I take My time in answering them. In fact, My time in answering someone's email to Me is in direct inverse ratio! The less time they put into writing Me, the longer it takes to get My attention! :)

Think about that, all you one-liners out there! *evil grin*

Lady Sonelle




perverseangelic -> RE: The point of profiles? (11/11/2004 10:19:35 PM)

< cynical >
My profile seems pretty dang pointless. I get at least a couple mails a week from people who obviously haven't even looked at it.

< /cynical >

They =are= useful in that they make it a lot easier to shoot down people who are totally NOT what you're looking for.

"Did you -read- my profile?"




Estring -> RE: The point of profiles? (11/11/2004 11:10:50 PM)

I guess it all depends on why you are on here. I wanted to meet a slave, and without my profile to look at, my slave and I would never have met. If you are a woman who is not looking, I would imagine having a profile on here could be a pain in the ass.




Laura -> RE: The point of profiles? (11/12/2004 2:31:32 PM)

Your profile is an introduction, a hello to anyone who cares to look. Anything beyond that is a bonus. I used to look at male sub profiles and wrote to many. These days I spare myself the trouble. Only the men who post to the boards seem worth getting to know but none of those are local to me. So, I just come in now and then to see what's brewing here, in the boards.




mtsilence -> RE: The point of profiles? (11/12/2004 6:03:16 PM)

Your profile is your best effort to be (at least one can hope) honest with those people with whom you are hoping to chat with and otherwise contact through the net and its reseources found here at CollarMe.com. If you think you are getting no responses then maybe you should look at what you have written, determine if you have indeed introduced yourself in a way that was interesting and which would make people reading your profile think 'I want to know more.' Some people on this site are seriously looking to make connections to form a relationship of some sort, others are on line to gain access to indiivduals who can provide them with information and knowledge as they explore the BDSM interests they have. There are also some who are just seeking tomake new friends in the lifestyle, becuase their work and other life duties prevents them from getting out and about much. It is a mixed bag, but it is a worthwhile place to start and explore your interests, and needs and who knows if your profile flags somebody's interest you might actually meet the one you are searchng for. Have faith in yourself and your ability to give people enough information about yourself as to make you interesting. Just be honest... do not make yourself out to be something more. Nor make yourself to be something less... respects Silence




jillwfsub4blkdom -> RE: The point of profiles? (11/13/2004 11:35:52 AM)

You spoke of the other areas of the site where people could utilize a chance to get to know others. i know a number of people who hang out in chat and never have been on the messageboard and i am sure the reverse is true too. Basically it is just an introduction which people can choose to utilize or not.

jill




MistressDREAD -> RE: The point of profiles? (11/14/2004 12:50:04 AM)

The point of a profile is VERY important to Me.

If the person dident sign on as a slave from the onset and give their limits and desires in a post, I do not touch them at all and contact them with a
interest to fullfill My desires. ( thinks back on the days when COCK PICS and their cockcages were allowed and enjoyed..... ahhhhhhhh)

Ohh well there is a exception to this, If I see a Alpha Male of interest to Me ( which is not to often ) I will also contact Them as well...
A profile saves Me time in what and who I contact and look over in My search for what would fullfill My desires. Those whom associate with the word sub or submissive or uses definitions that are sublike or part time hold no interest in Me and would be a waste of time to put any effort into for My extream desires and wants and contact.

When I first came to the Board when it first opened there were like three of Us LOL and it was so for a few months befor the Boards caught on. The same goes for when the chat rooms were open. There were two of Us whom had a room open LOL untill that too caught on..... Now the place is jumpin and the masses are a commin and well the rest is history so to speak but most of it started with the other side of Collarme with Our funkie profiles and attitudes to go with em! Oh yes and there even use to be a time when We could ACTUALLY SAY WHAT WE WANTED ON OUR PROFILES and not be umm errrrr monitored HAHAHAHAHA now We have been homoginized into total blandness..........so sad...... Thoseee wereeeeee theeeeeee dayyyyys My freind, We thought Theydddd neverrrrrr enddd Weeeeeed sing and danccceeeeeee ( on slaves chests! )for ever on a dayyy!!![:D]




yngskinhunter -> RE: The point of profiles? (11/14/2004 10:57:28 AM)

I have been putting profiles out on various alternate lifestyle website for a while it seems now. I have tried to "sell", myself to the masses. I have tried "being brutally honest". I've even been down right silly, in some of my ads.

Yes, some people see the picture. Get an erection, and the loss of blood flow to the correct head. Creates some, well, lets say less then desireable messages.

I look at the whole profile thing as, nothing more than putting a face to the desire. Would love to actually hear from interested females. Rather, than the pointless messages I get from guys wanting to compare notes.




blushes4u -> RE: The point of profiles? (11/14/2004 2:47:17 PM)

When i first came here i had no clue what to put in my profile. Being new to the lifestyle it was hard to list anything that i had experience in because i didn't, I still don't. I just made my profile interesting enough for someone to message me and get a conversation started. Most now who contact me has read my profile and starts with a question, which to me is a way to start communicating. So in a way yes profiles are necessary to start things in motion.




yellovv -> RE: The point of profiles? (11/14/2004 9:18:43 PM)

i like profiles imho. there's an image that shows a side of your personality in it and it show's that you have the time, effort, and patience to create one. i certainly can feel someone much easier after reading a profile than one that's empty. that and i believe there's more of a human quality that's willing to show signs of life. you know there's someone there on the otherside. to me, no profile usually = lazyiness, not a frequent user, or someone that's more private in expressing or sharing oneself...but then that's just me [8D]




RiotGirl -> RE: The point of profiles? (11/15/2004 6:25:58 AM)

I just wanted to add for those who "dont get any mail or responses" You have to actively search as well..... Being a femsub I think one gets alot of emails, mostly they got deleted, because it was too hard and a pain to sort through them. I actively searched.




GenghisKhan -> RE: The point of profiles? (11/15/2004 2:10:02 PM)

Profiles... I think profiles serve a purpose as a tool that can be utilized by those that so desire to take the time to read them. The only draw back to profiles is that is seperates those with the gift of the "Bard" from those that do not.




Nvernilla -> RE: The point of profiles? (11/15/2004 5:25:15 PM)

Well I feel the responses anyone gets from a profile are related to what you have to put in the profile. Myself I am looking to make a friend first and then see if there is anything there but then I'm perhaps looking for something different than many..I want it to last the rest of this life. Women who get responses where the person has obviously only looked at the pic know there is probably a shallowness there that is not worth investing time and energy in. I think the profiles are good as you at least know what this person wants or needs ( sometimes lol ) and what their taste may run to...Mike




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