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RE: Questions from a beginner - 6/24/2013 1:03:51 PM

kalikshama

Posts: 14805
Joined: 8/8/2010
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quote:

If my girlfriend asks me to do something I don't want to, I may or may not do it. Is it against this whole philosophy I want to compromise and find a good middle-ground for us? You guys are acting like I have to constantly stand above her, with her under my heel.

No one is saying that a Dom/Master/Top does not have the right to say No. I think what others are suggesting is that if dominating does not come naturally, maybe it's not a good fit for you.

I disagree.

Doms are not born with whip in their hands and Masters do not spring from the womb with the ability to lead.

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RE: Questions from a beginner - 6/24/2013 1:14:08 PM

crazyml

Posts: 5568
Joined: 7/3/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: sexyred1

If the idea of hurting someone makes you sick, you are likely not going to change, even if your girlfriend wants it.

I think this is sound advice, but... as usual there are always exceptions.

The idea of caning a girl till she cried would have made me feel nauseous 20 years ago. But when dating my first real painslut, she pretty much coached me into it. And the fact that the better I caned her the wetter she got helped enormously.

I still feel queasy at the thought of giving non pleasurable pain (I guess in that regard I'm a service sadist). Indeed, (I'm sure I've bored the board with this story before), I once accidentally let a nipple clamp snap closed on a playmates nipple - and was almost overcome with remorse - Which made her laugh, on account of the caning she'd just received at my hand.

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