quote:

ORIGINAL: Focus50

quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

I'm not squeamish about talking about sex with my adult kids. Or back when they were younger either, for that matter. So it wouldn't bother me a bit to ask these kinds of questions to make sure they were doing things responsibly. Your squeamishness is your problem.

You may not be but then I doubt you have much experience of being a dad to a daughter. Or that it'd surprise you to know that men and women rationalise things differently. Of course, that still leaves our respective cultural differences, maybe. Are you implying that you could and did talk to your dad about your sexual encounters, including in "squeamish" detail?


Focus.

quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

To my father, no. Because he would broadcast it and not be able to help. However, he's talked to me about his sex life.

Have I talked to my son? Yes.

I will say that my upbringing is quite different than damn near anyone else's. I've spent half my life in a clothing optional gay community where anything you can imagine hAs been done in public. I've had conversations with friends of my parents on the beach while half naked.

My mother was renowned for her sand sculptures. Highly realistic nudes. So I have no sex negativity, no squeamishness.

Regardless. If him having one uncomfortable conversation would save her from needless harm, then it's worthwhile. Just as the most embarrassed parent on earth should still have those uncomfortable talks with their children about sex. Being uncomfortable is not a sufficient reason not to engage in needed communication. Admit you're uncomfortable, express why you are forcing yourself to talk, and ask a few pertinent questions about safety. Are they using condoms? Is he forcing her to do things that could jeopardize her well being like being shared? Has she asked him how he learned to do what he proposes to do to her and is she satisfied with his knowledge and skill set? Does she have any moral or ethical qualms about what they do?

You will note that in those questions there is no request for a blow by blow description of their scenes or sex life.

quote:

ORIGINAL: angelikaJ

OP ,

If you are trying to learn about this so you can be accepting of your adult daughter's choices then good for you... but you have in your profile that you want to learn how to dominate?... and suddenly your motive seems suspect.

quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

I understand that you feel very uncomfortable about this. Personally I think my responsibility as a parent means I have to push aside my own feelings on occasion for the sake of my children.

Obviously you don't feel that you owe your children that. So be it.

quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

The op is a male trying to educate himself so obviously not all men feel the way you do.

And I assumed he picked dominant because he had to pick a label. And because he was afraid of mail he might get if he picked sub.

quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

The op is a male trying to educate himself so obviously not all men feel the way you do.

And I assumed he picked dominant because he had to pick a label. And because he was afraid of mail he might get if he picked sub.

quote:

ORIGINAL: angelikaJ

OP ,

If you are trying to learn about this so you can be accepting of your adult daughter's choices then good for you... but you have in your profile that you want to learn how to dominate?... and suddenly your motive seems suspect.