CynthiaWVirginia
Posts: 1915
Joined: 2/28/2010
From: West Virginia, USA
Status: offline
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Ladies. Its me again. My question is about a submissives physical appearance. Do you ladies want input on if a submissive changes her skin tone (tanning or bleaching) or hair color drasticly or contacts to alter eye color?
Yes, he would need my permission to make alterations or to continue making alterations. This isn't something I do just to throw my weight around, I want him to feel good about himself, and to be as healthy as he can be within reason. I would have to weigh the possible health problems that could come with altering skin tone (for tanning, does skin cancer run in their family tree, for example, and are they frequently careless and allow themselves to burn. How safe is the stuff used for bleaching or getting a tan from a dye bottle...I would have to research these before allowing it).
If my slave didn't come to me using hair dyes on his head and beard and mustache...I would have had him do so because it makes him not feel so old when he looks in a mirror.  Contact lenses? If I liked the colored ones, they would stay. If they enhanced his beauty, definitely. If I thought he was hiding part of himself behind them because his eyes reminded him of a relative he hated, I'd let him wear them for a while and get his butt into therapy. If his wearing them were giving him frequent eye infections...I would consult with his eye doctor before deciding if he would wear glasses instead or have fancy new lazer eye surgery done.
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Is a major diet and excercise to lose weight or gain weight important for you to be aware of?
Yes. That being said...know this; I'm fat. I would be a hypocrite to be hippo-ish and expect my slave to be always starving to be thin. I concentrate on eating more balanced, healthy foods and getting exercise. Two years ago I studied bo's usual diet and became quite alarmed; the man lived on sugar products and some deer meat (sometimes steak, lol). The first thing I did was get him on a daily multi vitamin for men over 50. When he got used to that, I started getting him used to the flavors of hot teas until he found one he didn't detest (wow, he actually likes one)...and drastically reduced his consumption of Orange Crush down from 2-4 liters per day down to one glass between meals and one with dinner...then down to the occasional rare treat, except in summertime. Due to his brain injury his body's thermostat is messed up, making him so hot that he is ill for days, vomiting and "out of it". Orange Crush helps head a significant part of the illness off at the pass, so to speak. Even then, he still drinks tea most of the time, Orange Crush is a treat and medicinal, not merely a water replacement anymore.
I'm introducing him to a strange new food called...veggies. Slowly, in baby steps.
When he's not physically active, doing stuff like yard work or hunting, he tends to put on weight. Getting him a little more active takes it back off. (Men have it so easy compared with women, weight loss wise.) Anyway, during winter months I have him do a walking exercise video at least every other day. It's only the walking in place thing, side steps, and the occasional set of kicking, nothing that would possibly damage his body. I've had to bench him from exercising until his next surgery and he's been putting on weight and hates it...cuz his blood pressure went back up and...well okay, I'll confess to having stroked his vanity these past two years and he hates having his belly poke out enough that it's hard for him to look down at his panties. This has nothing to do with food or diet but...I'm the one who put him into panties, it reminds him of who "wears the pants" in the family and "who wears the panties".
If he were twenty years younger I would have him do targeted exercises for body modification. Yep, one of them would be for his butt...it's too teeny and having more muscle to whack would be nice. If I owned a female, she would be doing calf raises and the Can-Can to give her shapelier legs...if I thought it would raise her self-esteem...because she disliked the shape of her legs.
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What about implants or other drastic modification or hair extensions?
I would need to know for safey reasons. I'm a hair puller, and for someone with longer hair I would enjoy some hair bondage (alas, I own a male and prefer him with moderately short hair...he had to grow his hair a little bit longer than he was used to, enough that I could get a good grab, lol), however, I would never wreck someone's hair extensions. (I'd keep my hands off.)
My slave has had a surgical implant put in recently because I felt it was in his best interest psychologically. I took my time and started preparing his mind for this more than a year ago. I will not allow my slave to mentally/emotionally cringe and feel less, like he's all broken down and should be replaced, just because he is aging and his body wasn't working the way it used to.
His numerous penile piercings were done with my permission, and each one (this was over multiple visits) while I was present. He had twentysomething. He needed these to regain some sensitivity. It made young men at play parties blanch and made bo walk tall with pride, lol. He needed two years before he was emotionally capable of trading these for the implant. Transition is hard...losing his piercings was like losing an arm, and it didn't help when his surgery had a rare complication...the pump prolapsed, breaking through the surgical closure when he sneezed real hard a few days after surgery. The pump part needs replacing, the next (and last) surgery is next week.
You were probably referring to things like breast implants (though I've known people with cheek enhancement implants and the same for chin enhancement implants, etc. Used to live in California, lol). I would probably have been too scared of rupturing the fluid filled bags to do any breast bondage, would have had to find out if I could cause any damage from heat (wax dripping), and would likely have limited myself to the nipples and left the rest of the breast alone. Zero impact play, zero breast bondage. (Hello, paranoid here when it comes to safeties.) My slave's penis has two sacks that fill up with fluid from a pump, and now I am too paranoid to whack it. Even before the surgery I was careful not to cause any penile fractures (one of the tubes filled with blood could rupture), nor anything like...testicular torsion (my cousin's wanking teenage son had to have emergency surgery over his nut getting twisted around).
Btw, my slave begged permission to have his ears pierced...but I said hell no. I wouldn't like how he'd look with earrings, and knowing him, before a year was out he'd want to start making the holes bigger and bigger and bigger. Ugh. I have to look at his daughter's ears looking like that...and yanno, the girl should be able to outdo her daddy on SOMETHING. (She had piercings and later on he got piercings, a H of a lot more than she did AND in the genitals, lol. She got several tattos and...viola...daddy was with her in the tattoo parlor and became obsessed with getting tatto'd. bo knows I want her to have her ear piercings without her daddy copying those too; the younger generation has to outdo us old things on at least something, lol.)
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Do you want to know what features your submissive has naturally and what may have been financially obtained instead of biologically?
Yes. Not out of any...criticism or judgment, nor to use it against them psychologically. I want to know if they feel they can trust me with everything...just how much trust did I earn, anyway? (Psst...if I were rich I'd have a nose job, a boob lift, and liposuction. Does that answer part of your unasked question? I am not judgmental about people trying to better themselves as long as it's for the right reasons and not for reasons like...being addicted to getting plastic surgeries.)
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do you want to have a say in these matters or does it not make a difference to you so long as the submissive is visually pleasing and appears healthy?
My submissive is also my slave, keep that in mind when I answer your questions. This is a lifetime partnership, till death do we part.
Yes, I have "a say".  If I didn't I wouldn't be in this relationship. I look after his own best interest as well as "us". I will be more flexible in my own desires when it comes to ensuring that my partner is visually pleasing (did I tell you that I detest facial hair on men I'm intimate with? bo's facial hair is very important to him at this time of his life so I'm allowing him to keep it. It's prickly enough to force me to rub my lips after a kiss, and as far as having it stab my clit...hell no, lol). He has offered to shave it off...but I know what's in his heart and I won't let him. His being mentally, emotionally, and physically healthy is more important to me than how "visually appealing" he is. Besides, if I cannot stand his whiskers I can always look at his nice fuzzy chest, his little butt, nice legs, and penis.
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Would some of these changes bother you if you are un aware upfront?
No...but then, I'm the type who made sure any man that became interested in me knew I had a history with having cancer. 4 times. I even let them know early on in our talks, before the first meetup, when my cancer was active and I was having treatment, to give them a chance to decide for themselves if they could handle what they might be getting into. I also let them know I had an autistic son who would always need to live with me, and someday when I die would likely have to go live in some group home if a family member didn't take him in. (Also that I've got cats, lol.)
If you are going to be in a casual relationship with someone, I don't see any need to tell them all the quirks you'd rather keep private. If someone you thought was long term relationship material rejected you so easily...clearly they were the wrong person (not a bad person, just the wrong person) to trust with everything you are, have been and will be.
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