RE: What am I? (Full Version)

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MasterCaneman -> RE: What am I? (6/30/2013 12:02:15 PM)

I think the issue with that word is more Auto-Correct or SpellCheck more than anything wrong with the person posting.




Kana -> RE: What am I? (6/30/2013 3:55:05 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: MarVet82

So, I have always considered myself a 'dominate daddy type'. I have been using positions and commands, mostly using common household items as restraints, and have never had any complaints.

Well, had a conversation with another who claims to be in the scene and she told me that I'm not anything but a top since I had not invested the time to learn the 'correct' names for positions or the money to have the 'correct' gear.

The discussion bordered on turning to an argument so I walked away.
So my question is, is technical knowledge and a bag of gear the community mark of a qualified Dom/Domme? Or is it all personality?

Thoughts and opinions?

You are what you say you are and anyone who feels differently can flark off.
This is BDSM-there ain't a universal manual.




graceadieu -> RE: What am I? (6/30/2013 10:28:06 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: MarVet82

Well, had a conversation with another who claims to be in the scene and she told me that I'm not anything but a top since I had not invested the time to learn the 'correct' names for positions or the money to have the 'correct' gear.


What did she think were the "correct" names for positions or the "correct" gear? That all seems very subjective to me. I don't even know what "names" positions have, other than, like, "kneel" or "hands and knees".

Don't worry about it - sounds like you dodged a bullet there.




MarVet -> RE: What am I? (7/1/2013 12:14:53 PM)

I will freely acknowledge that I am less experienced than most. But thanks for all the input. Just confirmed my opinion in the matter.
Different kicks for different folks. Lol




AWingedGuardian -> RE: What am I? (7/1/2013 12:15:08 PM)

Time to get my proverbial feet wet.

I feel that the issue here is that the individual you were speaking with might seek to use "proper gear" and "proper terminology" as a sense of validation. A sort of strutting about, as it were. Truth be told if you didn't have the mentality that allowed to you utilize the household items in the first place, then there would be an issue with referring to yourself as a "Dom." However I believe that nitpicking about terminology is rather petty in the grand scheme of things.

Does your submissive respect you, regardless of what item you are using? Do they understand the position without having to be told twice? Yes? Ok then. Crisis averted. There is no particular "manual" that everyone refers to for their word choice. I can guarantee that Dominants from other countries would utilize some other term, taking translations into account, of course.

Much less, I was under the assumption that by living this Lifestyle, we sort of stopped caring about what others thought of us?




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