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Menopause question - 6/30/2013 11:55:13 AM   
focalss


Posts: 164
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		To the Dominant Women, do you think you would be more or less interested in having a sub/slave when you are in menopause. I read a profile of a woman who said something about it. I was in bed with a woman going through it once while she was getting hot and sweating i would have liked a towel in the bed but it was ok otherwise. We didn't discuss it afterwards at all but I am thinking of it after I saw the profile.

Do you think it would make you more sadistic, more demanding or just more moody?

I heard some women say they wanted sex more during it too and wonder how common that is.
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Menopause question - 6/30/2013 12:14:39 PM   
Rawni


Posts: 1175
Status: offline 		Menopause is an individual thing. We may have some things in common, but it manifests in different ways. So many assume that what it is for one woman, is for another and believe me, the attitudes about that have flown about the mistress forum wildly. Older women don't like sex... older women get mean with menopause. They said that about PMS as well. The potential is there, but having experienced both, I can tell you... no matter what is going on hormonally, I am in charge. I get snappy, I know I need to take myself out and tend to my needs. I am not allowed to use hormones as an excuse to treat others poorly or create a situation where anyone has to walk on ice too thin.

As for sex... it depends on the situation and the woman. I have found that if she likes to have sex, has a partner she loves to have sex with, she will still love having sex. As for liking it more... well there could be many reasons for that and not all of them are hormonal. There are things that may affect the frequency, but hey, that is life before menopause as well.

Then we have the guy... lol... if he doesn't mind the sweat ball we can become, having fans on, the covers being yanked on and off all night, maybe for years... all good. If not... well... see ya. It isn't easy getting used to becoming a sweat ball and we may pull away, but there are ways to deal with it all, if we have a mind to.

< Message edited by Rawni -- 6/30/2013 12:16:01 PM >

(in reply to focalss)
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RE: Menopause question - 6/30/2013 12:38:25 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		Speaking for Myself, and ONLY for Myself, I honestly do believe that I'll get more moody. I have to catch Myself now when I have PMS. (My other half and I have a difference of opinion of how successful I am at that.)

I doubt I'm going to be more or less interested in having men in My life just because I'll be going through the change. (Do people still call it that?) My husband isn't submissive but I don't think I'll be divorcing him over it.

More sadistic? That's certainly something to ponder.


_____________________________

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Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

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RE: Menopause question - 6/30/2013 12:46:13 PM   
Rawni


Posts: 1175
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

More sadistic? That's certainly something to ponder.

[/color]


I think I like pondering your pondering on that! This could be fun! A more sadistic LadyPact.... oh yeah... I wouldn't mind hearing about that!

Signed the Baby Sadist

(in reply to LadyPact)
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RE: Menopause question - 6/30/2013 2:15:20 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		I'm thinking I'd need tarps. Lots and lots of tarps.


_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

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Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Menopause question - 6/30/2013 3:40:55 PM   
SpyUnderCover


Posts: 208
Joined: 6/21/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Rawni
As for sex... it depends on the situation and the woman. I have found that if she likes to have sex, has a partner she loves to have sex with, she will still love having sex. As for liking it more... well there could be many reasons for that and not all of them are hormonal. There are things that may affect the frequency, but hey, that is life before menopause as well.


Well said.

We're all different and no two of are are going to respond exactly the same. I may or may not be through with menopause; I'm not really sure. But I don't think it's had an effect on my style of dominance. I don't believe I've experienced any significant mood swings. As for hot flashes, I'm not sure if I've had those either. There have been times when I've woken up at night and thought, "Oh, I'm kinda hot, and I'm sweating." Then I've taken off one or two of, say, six blankets, maybe turned my heated mattress pad down to low, and gone back to sleep. I'm told that could be a hot flash, but that's the extent to which I've experienced them.

Spy

(in reply to Rawni)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Menopause question - 6/30/2013 4:36:59 PM   
Rawni


Posts: 1175
Status: offline 		I'm so jealous. I have had the hot flashes so bad, that I would turn purple and nearly pass out and had them every couple of minutes. People laughed about my spray water bottle with a little fan... until they saw me have a hot flash. That went on for a number of years and then they went mild and then started up again. !2 years of this... I am soooooooooooo done with this... but it isn't done with me.

What has been ever so cool is having men that would actually help me by opening a window, turning on a fan or something at the start of one. They didn't seem to mind, but I guess they kind of liked me.

(in reply to SpyUnderCover)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Menopause question - 6/30/2013 5:36:23 PM   
masmiss


Posts: 494
Joined: 2/16/2009
From: New Jersey
Status: offline 		Menopause hasn't changed me much. I did have hot flashes for a couple years but now they are rare. If I'm attracted to and care about my sub then sex is always a part of the relationship.

But, that's me. For each of the millions of menopausal women there are a million different ways menopause has affected them.



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I am the captain of my soul.

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(in reply to focalss)
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RE: Menopause question - 6/30/2013 5:46:23 PM   
ChatteParfaitt


Posts: 6562
Joined: 3/22/2011
From: The t'aint of the Midwest -- Indiana
Status: offline 		From the viewpoint of someone who has been through menopause, and w/o hormones, I admit I got moody. I was also highly emotional, I was pretty much pmsing for about two years. I had a good 7 years of peri-menopause (the precursor) and two full years of menopause, then it slowly tapered off and that took another two years.

The hot flashes were not to be believed, I would open the back door naked in the dead of winter trying to get some cool air on my skin.

I have a fairly active libido, I can't say it effected my sex life.

For anyone going through it, or who has a partner going through it, remember, this too shall pass.




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Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Menopause question - 6/30/2013 5:57:58 PM   
focalss


Posts: 164
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		Thanks for the replies, I was a little uncertain how the question would be received.

If the sub didn't have to go to work the next day or it didn't do anything more than make him uncomfortable (assuming you sleep together) would YOU feel better with him (her) in bed with you or not, putting aside his feelings of being bothered by it or not.

My feeling is that unless it kept me from getting necessary sleep it would be up to the dominant if she wanted me there or not even if it was uncomfortable for me or if it made her moody I would just have to accept it.

(in reply to ChatteParfaitt)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Menopause question - 6/30/2013 6:04:06 PM   
Rawni


Posts: 1175
Status: offline 		I never kept anyone awake with it all. Then I move pretty quietly when someone is sleeping. I make sure my fan is quiet too. Moving around a lot will always be a thing with me, so I've found having memory foam helps as I am not jiggling the bed all the time. They now make memory foam with some other things that actually cool you down and I have considered that.

My guys woke up more because of a chastity or a chain that had them locked, but of course I made sure their sleep wasn't interrupted a lot. Maybe on a weekend night, but if anything ruined their sleep I would put a stop to it, including if it were me. However, the one time we had to sleep separately wasn't because of me, but that bed of his was in the same room! I want him close.

(in reply to focalss)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Menopause question - 6/30/2013 6:17:08 PM   
MistressLucyK


Posts: 34
Joined: 4/8/2005
Status: offline 		They say its about 7 years to go through peri-menopause and then a year without the monthly

As said by others it really depends on the person. I did have hot flushes but they have gone, my legs can get a bit hot at night and its really up to the sub whether he wants to sleep with me. There's always the floor for them

I have noticed a slight drop in libido but no drop is desire for play

Moods ... maybe I don't want to party all nite like before and I was never a snappy person before


(in reply to focalss)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Menopause question - 6/30/2013 6:25:38 PM   
lusciouslips19


Posts: 9792
Joined: 9/8/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

Speaking for Myself, and ONLY for Myself, I honestly do believe that I'll get more moody. I have to catch Myself now when I have PMS. (My other half and I have a difference of opinion of how successful I am at that.)

I doubt I'm going to be more or less interested in having men in My life just because I'll be going through the change. (Do people still call it that?) My husband isn't submissive but I don't think I'll be divorcing him over it.

More sadistic? That's certainly something to ponder.



Hi Lady Pact, Long time. I'm not really here. I am in peri-menopause right now. Its been since October, so if I make it til next October, I will officially be in Menopause. I have found I am just as horny as ever. Though perhaps this will change. I also use to have horrible P.M.S. and took anti-anxiety medications and the Mini Pill to control hormones during my 40's. Now that I am "here", I can honestly say That I am the most content, I have ever been and the most mentally stable. No need for the meds. Just balanced and loving it.

I did have a lot of hot flashes but those were taken care of through a diet change featuring lots of fruits and vegetables and a reduction in sugars, bad carbs and other processed foods.

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Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Menopause question - 6/30/2013 6:56:06 PM   
DarkSteven


Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline 		OMG. lushy!!!!!!!

smoochsmoochsmooch

_____________________________

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The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

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Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Menopause question - 6/30/2013 7:09:36 PM   
DrkJourney


Posts: 1917
Joined: 5/6/2007
Status: offline 		Are ya'll freakin kidding me???? SEVEN years before you even get to menopause????? I'm just starting, and I don't have anything severe, but still....geez....this uncertainty for seven freakin years?????? I know everyone is different but with my luck I'll do the whole entire stretch.....LOL

(in reply to MistressLucyK)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Menopause question - 6/30/2013 11:10:01 PM   
NiceButMeanGirl


Posts: 2756
Joined: 11/4/2011
From: Bellingham, WA U.S.A.
Status: offline 		When I was younger, I used to wonder how I'd feel at this age. I'm 55 and I'm not supposed to take hormones due to family medical history, so I've been having hot flashes for....fifteen years now. I think I'm almost to menopause....hope hope hope. Anyway, I don't get particularly moody. I'm actually less moody than I was with my PMS years ago. I'm more revved up and feel more like sex now than I did fifteen, ten, or even five years ago. I know for sure I'm more interested in having a submissive man in my life than I've ever been before.

My hot flashes are the worst part of (peri)menopause for me. One flash will make me soaking wet all over. I think if my sub were spending the night, I'd still want my him sleeping with me and, if I did have a hot flash, I could move very quietly if necessary so as to not wake him up. My flashes are my problem and I don't want anyone else to suffer because of them.

Thanks for asking the question. That's how you get the answers you need.

NBMG

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Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Menopause question - 7/2/2013 3:48:33 AM   
MistressLucyK


Posts: 34
Joined: 4/8/2005
Status: offline 		maybe too much info so I do apologize

yes everyone is different like all things in life some breeze through it

to clarify - I was told by gyno -doctors that average of 7 years from start of disruption of monthly cycle through the hot flushes sweats etc
I had cycle issues where I couldn't use public transport and I knew the location of every public toilet in the city
Once the cycle stopped and none for 12 months your done!

So saving so much money not buying that stuff!

But I was still as horny as hell through the change

(in reply to NiceButMeanGirl)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Menopause question - 7/2/2013 7:40:00 AM   
chatterbox24


Posts: 2182
Joined: 1/22/2012
Status: offline 		Its like having sex with a wet lioness, they may bite your head off, or lick your wounds and that can change in a split second. LOL.

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Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Menopause question - 7/2/2013 11:22:09 AM   
MistressDarkArt


Posts: 5178
Status: offline 		Menopause for me has been easy in some ways, difficult in others. Mine was surgical, so I went from 60 to 0 with no easing-in. I have bio-identicals on board so generally don't flash. Libido wasn't much affected; it was starting to slow down a bit prior to the surgery and remains about the same after. But because of what condition the surgery left my body in, sex as I knew it had to be significantly modified. It's often better to forego trying and focus on other play such as 'outercourse' (as opposed to intercourse).

Do I still want partners? Hell, yes! Do we do the same stuff we used to? Not particularly. My sexuality is evolving with age and as long as I enjoy my life and my partners are getting their needs met (their sexuality is changing too!) it can continue to morph into whatever it is/will be. We're happy. That's all that matters.

(in reply to focalss)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Menopause question - 7/3/2013 8:57:52 AM   
Darkersided


Posts: 10
Joined: 6/1/2012
Status: offline 		Im 50 and havent got to that stage yet.I am still fertile.I have heard from most men that their menopausal wives have gone off sex 100%.

(in reply to MistressDarkArt)
Profile   Post #: 20
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