from Dom to Daddy dom with all the glitches!

from Dom to Daddy dom with all the glitches! (Full Version)

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Sirandlittle1 -> from Dom to Daddy dom with all the glitches! (6/27/2006 6:29:21 PM)
From our time together, i am aware of going into 'littleone' space. When he first named me that, it tapped into something inside. A daddy dom is a very attractive concept to that part of me. We have discussed it, and its definately something we'd like to explore. But as yet, lack the skills (both of us) lack the confidence too. Humiliation can make me feel awfully small, though i identify this as slightly a different space to littleone. So, i spoke to a Daddy Dom on how they got started, how to broach the subject. His advice was to just turn up in little girls clothes. When i spoke of this to my Dom, his response was, yes, why dont you? So, i suggested something i thought would be fun. A role play scene when he comes through the door, of giving him a note from a teacher, where i had been naughty and he was to 'deal' with me. His response to this, was he was glad i didnt just throw him in the deep end. That he may not of wished for that to occur that night. But yes, it was something we could do, with prior notice. Since then, we have had a night of mucking about with this head space. I turned up in a school girl outfit, which believe me, was really hard for me to do. I felt really awkward in the whole thing. I have this whole mental block. Im 42, appearing in a school girl outfit has "taxi for Ms Mutton" screaming in my head. But i pushed on with it. Ended up playing a slut and ignoring my costume all together. Although there were references to what a naughty girl i was. It just didnt flow for me. How the hell do i overcome the inner sensor of mine? Im not even sure what sort of little girl i am? how old i am? What it is that im seeking to address needs wise. Ive certainly found myself on the top of the list of lacking father figures. Mine was less then perfect shall we say. I have a friend who is a Daddy Dom. He's father christmas type figure. He's older, wiser, and i love the way i feel around him. It is not a sexual place. He is also gay, ergo, safe. My Dom is younger, thinner than i, not fitting my stereotype of Daddy Dom at all. And this also blocks things for me. For those of you that enjoy this particular head space. How did you overcome things. How do you get started. What the hell should we do? Ive thought of interupting our normal play to say, "just then, what you said/did, THATS it!" to show him which techniques work. Some of the stuff he tries is not working at all. Being called little girl turns me off for some reason, yet little one works. God its complicated trying up something new sometimes. I want to be able to play with my inner child. Im not sure its ever going to be sexual however. I think its more the nurturing side that appeals, the protection feeling, the being cherished. Also some of the discipline of a child, like being chastised, not spanked though works. Im confused. I want to talk to him about how this is going, but as usual, get my words all twisted in my head. So not sure how to express or what im trying to express even. Help would be appreciated. little1

BlouLady -> RE: from Dom to Daddy dom with all the glitches! (6/27/2006 7:05:03 PM)
There is a diffence in a DAddy Dom and age play. I love my "Daddy" but we have glitches too. He was not as comfortable as I would have liked him to be when we first started, and he told me " I married a woman. I don't want to be married to a child." Let me tell you...ouch. However when I was able to get over what felt like utter humiliation I explain that for me it wasn't an age thing. It was the needing to be safe and protected, knowing that he has everything under control, and would keep me on the right course. It's having him do what's best for me even when I don't like it. Now I will say that I do act young at times, throw fits and the like and in general he reigns me in. That's why we click so well. It took time though. It's still taking time. I don't know if this helped at all but good luck. ~Lady

juliaoceania -> RE: from Dom to Daddy dom with all the glitches! (6/27/2006 7:47:39 PM)
I have been seeing my Daddy for a couple of months. He and I always related as Daddy/darlin and it is not age play. He does have a thing for cheerleader outfits, but that is not the same as age play as cheerleaders are often fully grown women. I have seen another reply to you that age play is not necessarily part of Daddy Dom role, in fact a Dom that is not a Daddy can be into age play. It is a dynamic for us...I call him Daddy when we are alone. The more we interact the less I call him by his name. It WAS ackward at the very start, but it isn't anymore. I would only suggest that perhaps you interact with calling him Daddy and work towards the role play that he wants from you? Perhaps you can slip into pouty princess role here and there when you are playing with each other, not as a whole scene, but as just an interaction? It might make playing a whole scene in the little girl role easier. I can understand your discomfort because I would have trouble if this was expected from me.

PlayfulOne -> RE: from Dom to Daddy dom with all the glitches! (6/27/2006 8:54:25 PM)
I am Daddy around here which has nothing to do with age play, it is about security, safety, and feeling warm and nutured. I am Daddy around here and is about age play (though I hate to term it play), she has a little girl who comes to visit with a blankie and teddy bear. We do the school girl bit, but it has nothing to do with either, its a role play. Sometimes you just have to stop thinking about how you look and things of that nature and just go with it. I am not sure how to work at it, very early in our relationhsip I called her little girl and she answered yes Daddy, and we were both completely comfortable with it. Have you tried just calling him Daddy when your speaking and see how he reacts with that? Once you find a starting point and comfort level everything should flow from there. If either of you would like to talk, please feel free to message me on the other side, or if you would like the input of a "little one" her id is in my signature. K

LuckyAlbatross -> RE: from Dom to Daddy dom with all the glitches! (6/28/2006 6:39:52 AM)
Keep playing with it and do lots of talking about it when you aren't in scenes. If you have an idea- pounce on it. Don't wear a schoolgirl uniform, wear a plain white tshirt that says "Daddys Girl" on it with some jeans and sneakers. I don't plan anything or have a switch I can flick to get us into that zone. It just comes and goes as it does. The more we play with it, the more we talk about it, then the more easily we recognize signals in eachother that show we're "there."

talibahh -> RE: from Dom to Daddy dom with all the glitches! (6/28/2006 7:19:26 AM)
*hello little1,* *a while ago in a thread about Daddy Doms and little girls, Littlepita put in this article. i loved it so much i copied it... maybe it might help you too [:)]* and maybe... if you are having trouble expressing yourself, telling Him how you feel, getting your words mixed up... show Him this thread, what you wrote here... might help start a discussion that might lead somewhere. Or write it down... pour your heart and thoughts out to Him on paper/online journal, and then let Him read them in His time and have time to digest it, then discuss it... just another thought as well as the practical advice already given... *anyway... good luck, and i hope you like this article... all thanks go to Littlepita [;)]* *tali* Daddy/lil girl Daddy/little girl does not refer to the ages, real or pretend, of the participants. Nor does it imply closet desires. It refers to the environment that two people have created. A daddy Dom is so named because of the qualities he possesses and the service he provides. So, what are these qualities? What is a daddy Dom? A daddy Dom wants to be the center of your universe. He wants to be able to provide for your every need and care. But more than that he wants to be able to shape and mold you to the image he thinks you should become. He sees in you someone who, in his mind, can achieve a much higher, much greater status. He believes more in you than you believe in yourself. What he wants in return is to be able to bask in his image of you, the image he has created. How does he achieve his goals? Through love, respect, and discipline, His love for his little girl is understood. He accepts every part of her and works to emphasize the good while improving the bad. He loves her as much for whom she is as for who she will become with his guidance. It is this love that allows him to train her. He could not invest so much of himself in someone he did not love completely. This love would not be possible without respect. A daddy Dom needs to feel great pride in his possession. He needs to know she can hold her own in the outside world and still submit to him. He holds the greatest respect for the gift she has given him and takes great pains to increase its value. It is extremely important to him to know she can be with any man and she chooses to be with him. He knows that this makes discipline a priority in their lives, more important than in some other D/s relationships. In order for the little girl to really trust she must know he means what he says. He must constantly deepen her respect for him. If he does not enforce discipline, this respect becomes a tenuous thing. If his submissive finds that she can manipulate him out of punishing her, she begins to lose respect and the ability to empower becomes impeded. He needs to empower her as much as he wants to possess her and it becomes increasingly difficult to be possessed by someone you do not respect. The discipline is also important when it comes to her protection, both from those outside the relationship and those within. He is the one who makes the decisions about how she will relate to the world in general and his discipline ensures that she follows these rules. I think most Doms have a bit of the daddy in them, taking on the role of male authority figure in their submissive's life and using their power to enrich that life. daddy/little girl verbalizes that feeling, and adds a dimension of warmth, caring, and ritual that it's participants crave.

mam -> RE: from Dom to Daddy dom with all the glitches! (6/29/2006 11:42:32 AM)
Does this mean I will have to let out the momma side of me out? lol Wasn't there a movie called "Bad Momma"? mam

perverseangelic -> RE: from Dom to Daddy dom with all the glitches! (6/29/2006 12:52:39 PM)
I find that putting on schoolgirl clothes is probably the -farthest- from my young-self because it's been so sexualized in my brain as part of my adult-self. Basically my point is to try some stuff that's NOT the sexualized part of "young' (schoolgirl/cheerleader/etc), something that isn't so much in the realm of the fetishized. I don't fall into little boi headspace very often, but for me, nothing does it like a white wifebeater and big short. Stuff like flannel pajamas, fairly modest nightgowns, very light makeup and braids are more likely to throw me into a younger-self, as well.

Littlepita -> RE: from Dom to Daddy dom with all the glitches! (6/29/2006 5:19:57 PM)
When we first started with the Daddy/little girl it felt occurred for me too. The more I called him Daddy though and let myself go with it the easier and better it got. My Daddy is older then me and in many ways he is paternal. He takes care of me and keeps me safe. He makes sure that I do my chores and obey him. For us it's not about age play, but age play can and does sometimes come into it. Like I have a room he built for me in a closet and I have my bunny and colors and I will go in there and get into my little girl head space. Sometimes were in bed having sex and we very naturally flow from Daddy's little pita to Daddy's little slut. Just keep at it and remember you have to do what feels right for you then it will be right.

findmedaddy -> RE: from Dom to Daddy dom with all the glitches! (6/29/2006 5:46:38 PM)
You've gotten some wonderful responses here. Thank you for posing the questions, because I have learned something. My reaction is similar to others'. Age play and responding to the words "little one" the way you did are two very different things. If you have a childlike part of you that wants a daddy sometimes, the last thing you'll be interested in is dressing up to be "daddy's dirty little girl." I know. My handle attracts lots of responses from men who identify as daddy doms and for whom that means, essentially, "What is the little girl going to do for daddy?" If you are resonating to "little one," the question is reversed: "What is daddy going to do for this part of me that needs love and attention and boundaries and is not about sex?" If you feel like that and you conflate the little girl with daddy's dirty little girl...trouble. I am understanding more and more that men who are wired to be daddies to the little girls inside us are extremely hard to find. But if, for you, it can be an occasional thing, with you otherwise in a grown-up sexual relationship (or even occasionally dressing up in the school uniform, if you can separate that emotionally from your little girl), it could be a wonderful thing. A chance for your sir to nurture you in a special way. There's a story posted on a free site that you might want to look at and show your partner. It's called "Coming Home to Daddy," by a woman who called herself Bookbabe (I read somewhere that she had died -- no idea if that's true). It's not quite what I'm describing, but it's darn close. Good luck, and thanks again for posting.

Sirandlittle1 -> RE: from Dom to Daddy dom with all the glitches! (6/30/2006 11:38:15 AM)
Thankyou all so much for these responses. There is a lot in them that rings so true and clearly a lot to learn. There is also a lot of hope here for me, as the description of a Daddy Dom, is more often than not, the style that he adopts with me for day to day living. With other aspects of head space for playing together as well as the adult to adult friendship side of things. I will certainly be talking more to him of this. Clearly, there was a reason that being sexual did not fit with the littleone space. And when i consider things that tip me in this dynamic, its certainly not sexual. Things like being put to bed when im tired but still up, having my hair brushed, being collected and taken places all of it, id consider his nurturing side. I did a search on lit for the 'coming home to Daddy' story, it wasnt there. Perhaps you could direct me to which site this is on and ill read. thanks for the help guys. its nice to get some practical suggestions, to head things in the right direction when your a bit out of your depth. little1

gentlethistle -> RE: from Dom to Daddy dom with all the glitches! (6/30/2006 12:19:23 PM)
I assume that this is the story mentioned: http://www.thespankingcorner.com/stories/bookbabe/coming_home.html

CrappyDom -> RE: from Dom to Daddy dom with all the glitches! (6/30/2006 12:54:49 PM)
The problem with asking for advice on this sort of issue is it is far more specific to you and him and the dynamic you create together than say flogging which has many many more parallels. Like not liking "little girl" but liking "little one". Why? You may not know now but when those sort of flashes hit you, both good and bad, try and look around your brain for flashes of images or feelings. Find the source of the difference and you find the key to make this "work". You mention your inner censor. There is a difference between the classic "good girl that secretly wants to be a slut," and something that because of something in your past doesn't work for you. You mention the whole age difference and how you couldn't get into the girl thing. I think it is important for you to work out who "daddy" is to you so you have a clear understanding of what you want and can communicate that. I think you are on the path, you can see that you quote: want to be able to play with my inner child. I'm not sure its ever going to be sexual however. I think its more the nurturing side that appeals, the protection feeling, the being cherished. It DOESN'T have to be sexual, at least if you are exploring it for you and he is helping you along that path. I enjoy the role of "daddy" but for me, it isn't about molesting or even young girls it is about being nurturing. I like to have my sex with nasty slutty women but I like to dominant good little girls. The trick is to find a partner who can be both and who's needs match. The same of course goes for him, he needs to discover what part of this works for him. Then the two of you, in whatever way works for your power dynamic, need to sit down with the pieces, figure out which go well with each other, which are special treats for one or the others, and which just don't fit. The one thing I really see is that you two have the skills to work together and communicate, those are far more valuable than 10 years in the scene and a toybox full of floggers ANY day. Best of luck!

Littlepita -> RE: from Dom to Daddy dom with all the glitches! (6/30/2006 1:20:25 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: gentlethistle I assume that this is the story mentioned: http://www.thespankingcorner.com/stories/bookbabe/coming_home.html Love this story!!!

findmedaddy -> RE: from Dom to Daddy dom with all the glitches! (2/10/2007 11:28:15 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Littlepita quote: ORIGINAL: gentlethistle I assume that this is the story mentioned: http://www.thespankingcorner.com/stories/bookbabe/coming_home.html Love this story!!! I'm sorry it took me so long to come back and look at this thread again. I'm glad you liked the story. It's always been a favorite of mine. Now....if I could only find my daddy!

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