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Here's the problem with all the shit that's going on..... - 8/30/2013 4:43:48 PM

LookieNoNookie

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There's always new shit.

When you finally learn all the shit you're currently dealing with....other shit comes in....that then becomes old shit (unless you're still dealing with it, then it's "current" shit).

New shit is something everyone has to deal with but MY shit always seems new (unless it's old shit I'm trying to relegate to old shit) because....well...it's new shit and one has to differentiate it from old shit...which is actually somewhat easy....old shit is the shit you dealt with previously and presumed it was now expired shit.

Expired shit is shit you thought was old shit only because well....you've distanced yourself from that shit. But old shit often becomes new shit (because you never made it old shit by making it expired shit...and therefore, in several cases, it becomes new shit....not because it's actually new but because....you never made it old shit).

I always say....watch your shit.

(That's what I'm thinking).

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RE: Here's the problem with all the shit that's going o... - 8/30/2013 4:47:51 PM

MasterCaneman

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Thanks. George Carlin couldn't have said it any better.

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RE: Here's the problem with all the shit that's going o... - 8/30/2013 5:30:18 PM

LookieNoNookie

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterCaneman

Thanks. George Carlin couldn't have said it any better.

Wow....thanks. That's high praise....I was actually just being stoooopit.

< Message edited by LookieNoNookie -- 8/30/2013 6:21:02 PM >

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RE: Here's the problem with all the shit that's going o... - 8/30/2013 8:45:25 PM

MasterG2kTR

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Well....since you're talking shit.....it's time to re-post the list......

*The Shit List*

GHOST SHIT: The kind where you feel the Shit come out, but there is no Shit in the toilet.

CLEAN SHIT: The kind where you Shit it out, see it in the toilet, but there is nothing on the toilet paper.

WET SHIT: The kind where you wipe your butt 50 times and it still feels unwiped, so you have to put some toilet paper between your butt and your underwear so you won't ruin them with stains.

SECOND WAVE SHIT: This happens when you're done Shit-ing and you've pulled your pants up to your knees, and you realize that you have to Shit some more.

POP-A VEIN-IN-YOUR-FOREHEAD SHIT: The kind where you strain so much to get it out, you practically have a stroke.

LINCOLN LOG SHIT: The kind of Shit that is so huge you're afraid to flush without first breaking it into little pieces with the toilet brush.

GASSY SHIT: It's so noisy, that everyone within earshot is giggling.

DRINKER'S SHIT: The kind of Shit you have the morning after a long night of drinking. It's most noticeable trait is the skid marks on the bottom of the toilet.

CORN SHIT: Self explanatory.

GEE-I-WISH-I-COULD-SHIT SHIT: The kind where you want to Shit but all you do is sit on the toilet and fart a few times.

SPINAL TAP SHIT: That's where it hurts so badly coming out, you'd swear it was leaving you sideways.

WET CHEEKS SHIT (The Power Dump): The kind that comes out so fast, your butt cheeks get splashed with water.

THE DANGLING SHIT: This Shit refuses to drop in the toilet even though you are done Shit-ing it. You just hope that a shake or two will cut it loose.

THE SURPRISE SHIT: You're not even at the toilet because you are sure you are about to fart, but *oops* --- a Shit!

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RE: Here's the problem with all the shit that's going o... - 9/2/2013 12:45:50 AM

metamorfosis

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Fuck that shit.

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RE: Here's the problem with all the shit that's going o... - 9/2/2013 5:29:26 PM

ivone57

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oh shit...

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RE: Here's the problem with all the shit that's going o... - 9/2/2013 8:13:56 PM

TNDommeK

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Holy shit!

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RE: Here's the problem with all the shit that's going o... - 9/2/2013 9:09:04 PM

LadyPact

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Great shit all around.

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RE: Here's the problem with all the shit that's going o... - 9/2/2013 10:10:38 PM

fluffypet67

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MasterG2kTR I've got two you missed.

BAG SHIT - shit in the colostomy bag

PANCAKE SHIT - when you shit into the colostomy bag and it doesn't slid down but stays around the stoma.

[I guess you had to be there.]

< Message edited by fluffypet67 -- 9/2/2013 10:11:35 PM >

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RE: Here's the problem with all the shit that's going o... - 9/3/2013 4:10:36 AM

ivone57

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@fluffypet, seen it and its disgusting ...the pancake shit

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RE: Here's the problem with all the shit that's going o... - 9/3/2013 4:29:16 PM

fluffypet67

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My shit tends to pancake all the time. At least I can get by with a mini bag and just pop it out.

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RE: Here's the problem with all the shit that's going o... - 9/3/2013 6:44:19 PM

theshytype

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Ah, shite.
That's some pretty shitty shite.

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RE: Here's the problem with all the shit that's going o... - 9/3/2013 7:38:22 PM

FelineRanger

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterG2kTR

THE SURPRISE SHIT: You're not even at the toilet because you are sure you are about to fart, but *oops* --- a Shit!