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orgasmdenial12 -> RE: Odd Reaction? (9/7/2013 5:43:44 AM)
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Funnily enough yes - and it was slapping that caused it too.
With an ex, I told him I wanted to be slapped. We did it, all giggles, it really turned us on, so we did it some more. It developed and became a part of our relationship. Then he started using it as punishment if I said or did something I wasn't supposed to. We were mid-argument, he held my head steady and told me he was going to slap me. As soon as he said it, I knew it was the wrong thing for him to do, I felt furious and miserable. I let him slap me and then I went in another room and just cried my eyes out. He tried it a few more times but I started flinching and reacting badly and eventually told him it was now a hard limit for me. I had associated it with him being angry at me, with punishment rather than s&m or pleasure, with an unhealthy power imbalance rather than sensuality or eroticism. The conclusion I came to is - slapping, for me, is very heavily laden with the emotional and sensual atmosphere at the time. If it's done in the wrong way, at the wrong time, or too hard, it feels like abuse, like domestic violence, and that's never a path I want to go down.
If I were you, I would have a long hard talk with your partner about the right times and ways to do it and the wrong times and ways to do it. Because there's too much potential for emotional and mental pain if it goes wrong, imo.
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