Blackmail

Blackmail (Full Version)

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Hellrider1 -> Blackmail (9/4/2013 8:42:45 AM)
Hello, I am relatively new to the scene and am being threatened by a Dom I do not wish to have contact with. He says that if I do not go to his for a weekend and submit to everything he requires, then he will expose me and my photo's to my partner, family and employers. He initially threatened on here, then by text and today by letter to my home address. I do not know whether to go straight to the police with this or if there is a way inside the community to stop this behaviour. My understanding was that CONSENSUAL was key.... I do not consent and I do not ever wish to consent to this man. If I have posted in the wrong section please forgive me, as I am new. Any advice will be gratefully received.

Hillwilliam -> RE: Blackmail (9/4/2013 8:44:30 AM)
I do believe it might be time to get the local police involved.

ChatteParfaitt -> RE: Blackmail (9/4/2013 8:46:54 AM)
This: quote: ORIGINAL: Hillwilliam I do believe it might be time to get the local police involved. This person is counting on you being too embarrassed to go to the cops. Don't be. The police have seen and heard it all (or most of it). Get them involved, and no matter how an individual office behaves, retain your dignity. You have a right to be respected by the police, please don't forget that. Best, CP

Ladytisha -> RE: Blackmail (9/4/2013 8:50:29 AM)
The only time it would be consensual is if you wanted to be black mailed. You need to go to the police and every text message and every letter keep them, it will be proof. I don't care how submissive you are no one deserves to be blackmailed

sexyred1 -> RE: Blackmail (9/4/2013 9:00:29 AM)
Why does he have all that info on you if you are not involved with him?

VideoAdminRho -> RE: Blackmail (9/4/2013 9:14:29 AM)
Please report any messages that threaten to blackmail you so that we can take appropriate steps here as well.

angelikaJ -> RE: Blackmail (9/4/2013 9:15:08 AM)
Next time be much, much more careful with your personal information. At this point he should not know who your employer is or where you live. He should not know anything identifiable about your friends or family. It takes a long time to get to know someone and until you actually meet them face-to-face, they are a stranger. If anyone tells you, you are not submissive enough, just walk away. You do not need to prove yourself to a stranger; someone you don't know. (This includes not cam-ing for them and not showing your girly parts to prove you are not a man.) Sub-frenzy: http://www.submissiveloving.com/subfrenzy.html

Hellrider1 -> RE: Blackmail (9/4/2013 9:22:58 AM)
Hindsight is a wonderful thing.... I was totally new on here with no experience. He has been a Dom for over 30 years. Yes, he said that I was too private and that I had to learn to talk about things and to hand details over, as a Dom would expect to know everything about his sub...etc.... He knew what to ask and I was totally green... lesson learned. Once I have sorted this matter I will leave this lifestyle. Admin, where and how do I report this? I looked for areas and sent one complaint, but it did not fall under the categories mentioned and was a no reply section. thank you to everyone who has posted.

Hellrider1 -> RE: Blackmail (9/4/2013 9:28:16 AM)
Admin, I am going on the message on my messages, clicking on threats box, but nothing happens when I press submit??

OsideGirl -> RE: Blackmail (9/4/2013 9:36:46 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Hellrider1 He has been a Dom for over 30 years. Always take the "I've been a Dom for 30 years" thing with a grain of salt. It could be an outright lie, it could be 30 years of failed relationships, it could be 30 years of trying to force reality to meet up with what porn or Castlerealm says, or he could be the type of person that learns nothing from experience. quote: Yes, he said that I was too private and that I had to learn to talk about things and to hand details over, as a Dom would expect to know everything about his sub...etc.... This tells me that he lacks long term experience. Trust and knowledge take time. It takes the submissive feeling comfortable enough to hand those items over. Forcing or demanding those items means that he lacks contact with reality. The best advice I can give you is use common sense and don't do things you're not comfortable doing until you're ready.

VideoAdminRho -> RE: Blackmail (9/4/2013 9:47:06 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Hellrider1 Admin, I am going on the message on my messages, clicking on threats box, but nothing happens when I press submit?? Okay, please just copy, paste and email them to me. I'll make sure Alpha gets them.

DarkSteven -> RE: Blackmail (9/4/2013 10:02:13 AM)
Go to the police. They can charge him with harassment. I'd also file a restraining order. Look, I'm sorry for what happened to you, but he was simply an abuser claiming to be a Dom. There are a lot of good people in tge lifestyle.

petitespot -> RE: Blackmail (9/4/2013 10:17:27 AM)
You're 48 not 18. Show a little common sense and caution and start thinking with your head and not your pussy.

LadyPact -> RE: Blackmail (9/4/2013 10:18:46 AM)
People who threaten or follow through with calling employers, family, etc are serious scum bags. I hope you are able to take care of this problem.

ResidentSadist -> RE: Blackmail (9/4/2013 10:18:46 AM)
Did he make these threats in writing and do you have copies? If so, you can easily take the actions mentioned in above replies. Stop interacting with him. Block him to end contact Hide your profile so he can't get at you with an alt account. Report him to the mods. Report him to the authorities and find out what actions you can take, like a restraining order as Steven mentioned. Find an ambulance chaser (attorney) and sue him for distress. . . . or keep your appointment with him and when he opens the door, have Guido and Vinny jump out of the bushes and break each and every one of his fingers.

MasterCaneman -> RE: Blackmail (9/4/2013 10:35:46 AM)
What I'm curious is, how did he get your home address?

punisher440 -> RE: Blackmail (9/4/2013 12:59:23 PM)
MC, if the abuser in question had the OP's real name and phone number,it's not hard to come up with an address in this digital age. I once had a stalker that showed up in my driveway when I came home from work one day and that was the only info she needed to find me. [But the OP probably met the blackmailer in person at his residence before...[8\|] ]

OsideGirl -> RE: Blackmail (9/4/2013 1:01:43 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: punisher440 MC, if the abuser in question had the OP's real name and phone number,it's not hard to come up with an address in this digital age. In some cases, just the phone number. If the number will come up in reverse look up, it would provide the name and city, state. From there it wouldn't be hard to gather more info.

punisher440 -> RE: Blackmail (9/4/2013 1:11:06 PM)
Oside,you are right in most cases...but if the person uses one of the pre-paid cell phones you won't get a name[or at least the correct one] associated with that number. But a landline or many of the other cell phones can be easily traced with a little effort.

angelikaJ -> RE: Blackmail (9/4/2013 1:15:27 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: OsideGirl quote: ORIGINAL: Hellrider1 He has been a Dom for over 30 years. Always take the "I've been a Dom for 30 years" thing with a grain of salt. It could be an outright lie, it could be 30 years of failed relationships, it could be 30 years of trying to force reality to meet up with what porn or Castlerealm says, or he could be the type of person that learns nothing from experience. quote: Yes, he said that I was too private and that I had to learn to talk about things and to hand details over, as a Dom would expect to know everything about his sub...etc.... This tells me that he lacks long term experience. Trust and knowledge take time. It takes the submissive feeling comfortable enough to hand those items over. Forcing or demanding those items means that he lacks contact with reality. The best advice I can give you is use common sense and don't do things you're not comfortable doing until you're ready. Or he was just a very manipulative SOB. The advice is good regardless.

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