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Suggestions for tasks both humiliating and not - 10/1/2013 1:08:00 AM

Ashleysboy1989

Posts: 2
Joined: 10/1/2013
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Me and my GF of 6 months have just started getting more into the BDSM lifestyle ( we have dabbled around for quite a while even before we officially started dating. ) I am the sub I am a 21 year old male. I enjoy completing tasks for her both in her presence and when im home,school, work, ext. I am into humiliation but not hardcore like her calling me ugly or things like that, neither of us are into that. I do enjoy being called a whore,slut,sex toy and things like that...I was just wondering if any one had any ideas as far as tasks and assignments. Maybe like me taking pictures to prove I completed the assignments or things like that? ..also I was wondering how we would go about maybe gathering more.information about the lifestyle or maybe even finding a mentor couple or something along those lines.

Thanks for the help...appreciate any responses :)

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RE: Suggestions for tasks both humiliating and not - 10/1/2013 11:38:59 AM

SpyUnderCover

Posts: 208
Joined: 6/21/2010
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Are you looking specifically for tasks to do while away from her, like in a long distance situation? Have you met her in person? I am asking because that may color how I respond.

As far as gathering more information, I would check out this book list:
http://www.collarchat.com/m_1726118/tm.htm

I also recommend going back and reading some of the archived threads here. I learned a lot that way when I was first starting out.

Spy

(in reply to Ashleysboy1989)

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RE: Suggestions for tasks both humiliating and not - 10/1/2013 3:20:48 PM

Ashleysboy1989

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Joined: 10/1/2013
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Were dating and see each other on an everyday basis. I was talking about like if I am at work or at home or if I do not get to see her for a couple days. Also possibly ways to spice things up in the bedroom but not even necessarily just sex things to do around the house as well. I have also check other forms on here and have gotten some ideas and suggestions, but was just seeing what would pop up if I posted something myself more specific I'm situation.

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RE: Suggestions for tasks both humiliating and not - 10/1/2013 8:05:01 PM

SpyUnderCover

Posts: 208
Joined: 6/21/2010
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Well in many respects I'm thinking she should be the one asking this question, not you. What about dominating you does she enjoy? How would she like to be served? If she can answer those questions, that would go a long way in her (not you) coming up with assignments for you. If you take a picture to show you've completed a task (to use your example), and she doesn't care whether you show her a picture or not, it won't be serving her; it will only be serving yourself.

Ask her how you can make her life easier or more comfortable ... and don't badger her about it; let her take her time giving you an answer. Does she want a meal ready for her when she comes home from work? A candlelit bubble bath and warm towels just before bed? Maybe she'd like you to focus on quitting smoking, or working out, or improving your diet. Maybe she'd like you to report on your progress once a week ... or once a day ... or whatever the two of you agree on.

I've left subs to perform specific household chores while I was away; I've left notes detailing exactly how I wanted them to be dressed (or undressed), and what position I wanted them in when I arrived home. There are as many possible ways to serve as there are dommes to be served. But it's ultimately up to her, and what she wants.

Spy

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RE: Suggestions for tasks both humiliating and not - 10/2/2013 12:42:49 AM

AthenaSurrenders

Posts: 3582
Joined: 3/15/2012
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Fast Reply

- Take the Doberman out for an extra long walk
- Polish the parquet floors
- Pole dance
- Make steak with cream sauce for dinner

Except perhaps now you're going to tell m that you don't have a doberman or parquet flooring, you don't know how to pole dance and your girlfriend is a vegan.

OK I know that sounds snippy, but how can you possibly get sensible suggestions when none of us know you or her? We don't know what kit you have access to, how much time you have, what your limits are, what your skills are, how much safety knowledge you have or what turns you on. I could tell you our top ten sessions in detail and chances are none of them would be right for you. I could tell you a sample day in the life of ways I submit outside the bedroom, but unless you guys happen to be married with a baby and a family business, it won't be much help.

Think of it this way: would you ask us to choose your outfit without knowing your size or where you plan to wear it?

For kinky things, watch some porn together, look up some online erotica to read, maybe google a BDSM checklist and talk about what sounds good to you both. Look up community events and go watch a demo. It shouldn't be hard work to figure out things to try in bed. Invent things. Do whatever sounds fun. If it's turning you both on, you're doing it right. If not, well, no big deal, it's not like sex is rationed, you can try something else.

For non-kinky things, it really depends on what would make her happy. Maybe she loves good food and would appreciate you spending a whole afternoon making her favourite dish. Maybe she's been meaning to re-grout the bathroom tiles and you could save her the job. Maybe submission for you means watching her choice of tv show and listening to her radio station in the car. It doesn't have to be elaborate or complicated. Ask her. There's bound to be something. Oh, and then don't pout if she mentions something you really don't want to do. That's the thing with submitting - you have to actually submit.

In my relationship, he gives me some orders and has a few rules, but most of my service is pro-active. By that I mean I look out for ways to make his life a little better. Can I do that paperwork to save him the work later? Would he like me to make some popcorn while he watches that movie? It's starting to get cold, so I'll go and buy him some warm sweaters and work socks before he needs them.

_____________________________

Being your slave, what should I do but tend
Upon the hours and times of your desire?

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