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Newly dominant wife seeks help with husband. - 10/4/2013 3:02:02 PM

MarineGuy4U

Posts: 6
Joined: 2/5/2011
Status: offline

Ok so im fairly new to the lifestyle and my husband has a more in debth relationship within the lifestyle and basically I'm wanting to turn my husband into not only a complete sissy but my sexual slave and personal slave ( shaving my legs, painting my nails, holdin my bags while shopping) and things like that to better my personal daily life. I'm having trouble finding ideas and ways or methods to transform him. I was hoping someone on here might have suggestions or a website that goes step by step so to speak to turn him into what I want.

Any help would be greatly appreciated and please ask any questions you might have any :)

This is not my account but we will have one together very soon I can assure you that. I will be taking over so look back for new pics and updates for anyone who is interested in helping :)

Take care :) Mandy

< Message edited by MarineGuy4U -- 10/4/2013 3:34:10 PM >

Post #: 1

RE: Newly dominant wife seeks help with husband. - 10/4/2013 3:19:21 PM

mnottertail

Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline

Yeah, can you lose the picture, move something more pleasant to your first picture. Bad form old boy.

_____________________________

Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30

(in reply to MarineGuy4U)

Post #: 2

RE: Newly dominant wife seeks help with husband. - 10/4/2013 3:30:29 PM

LookieNoNookie

Posts: 12216
Joined: 8/9/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: mnottertail

Yeah, can you lose the picture, move something more pleasant to your first picture. Bad form old boy.

:)

Indeed.

(in reply to mnottertail)

Post #: 3

RE: Newly dominant wife seeks help with husband. - 10/4/2013 3:39:22 PM

MarineGuy4U

Posts: 6
Joined: 2/5/2011
Status: offline

What are you talking about ?

(in reply to LookieNoNookie)

Post #: 4

RE: Newly dominant wife seeks help with husband. - 10/4/2013 3:51:12 PM

VideoAdminRho

Posts: 2055
Joined: 3/24/2010
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They're talking about the avatar that just barely squeaks by the ToS of the site.

(in reply to MarineGuy4U)

Post #: 5

RE: Newly dominant wife seeks help with husband. - 10/4/2013 3:55:36 PM

MarineGuy4U

Posts: 6
Joined: 2/5/2011
Status: offline

Ok I'm not sure this wasnt my profile originally I'm just changing things around.

(in reply to VideoAdminRho)

Post #: 6

RE: Newly dominant wife seeks help with husband. - 10/4/2013 4:25:55 PM

DarkSteven

Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline

This isn't what you want, but there are a LOT more men into sissification and service such as you describe, than women. See if you can find a site or someone who's a sissy themself, to guide you.

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to MarineGuy4U)

Post #: 7

RE: Newly dominant wife seeks help with husband. - 10/4/2013 4:40:14 PM

MarineGuy4U

Posts: 6
Joined: 2/5/2011
Status: offline

Oh ok well thank you for replying, do you happened to know of a site ? I mentioned that in my post if anyone knew of a site......

(in reply to DarkSteven)

Post #: 8

RE: Newly dominant wife seeks help with husband. - 10/4/2013 5:18:57 PM

SylvereApLeanan

Posts: 8275
Joined: 11/1/2007
From: Hell
Status: offline

There are a couple of sites that offer sissy "training" but they are paid sites. However, you already know everything you need to know. After all, you're a woman, right? So you should already know about things like using a good facial moisturizer, shaving your legs, painting your nails, and picking out clothes. All you need to do is think about what you want done and then craft a step-by-step guide for him to follow.

As far as turning him into your personal slave, that's just a matter of him agreeing to follow your lead. If you want him to hold your bags while shopping, hand him the bags and say "hold this, please" and then thank him when he does. It's not rocket science.

And yes, you can say "please" and "thank you." Being dominant is no reason not to use good manners.

Since your husband is more familiar with the lifestyle, he'll be a valuable resource for you. He can probably recommend some good books such as Training With Miss Abernathy or The Loving Dominant. If not, you can find some good suggestions in the book list sticky in the General section. He'll probably also have some ideas about fun playtime activities he likes and will be able to show you how to do them. If he can't, there's always the option of finding a kink group in your area that offers demonstrations where you can learn from other tops and dominants.

The important thing here is that you communicate with each other and that each of you listens to what the other wants and needs. Best of luck.

_____________________________

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(in reply to MarineGuy4U)

Post #: 9

RE: Newly dominant wife seeks help with husband. - 10/4/2013 6:22:27 PM

Rochsub2009

Posts: 2536
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SylvereApLeanan
However, you already know everything you need to know. After all, you're a woman, right? So you should already know about things like using a good facial moisturizer, shaving your legs, painting your nails, and picking out clothes. All you need to do is think about what you want done and then craft a step-by-step guide for him to follow.

As far as turning him into your personal slave, that's just a matter of him agreeing to follow your lead. If you want him to hold your bags while shopping, hand him the bags and say "hold this, please" and then thank him when he does. It's not rocket science. And yes, you can say "please" and "thank you." Being dominant is no reason not to use good manners.

I agree.

OP, you're making this far more complicated than it needs to be. You're a woman, so sissification should come pretty easy to you. Simply treat him like you treat yourself. Put on makeup, panties, pretty clothes, nail polish, etc.

Same with domination. Just figure out what you want him to do, then tell him to do it. It's that easy. You don't need a manual. After all, no manual can know what YOU like and dislike. Only you know that.

You may want to join your local BDSM group and watch other Doms/Dommes in action. That may give you some ideas as well.

Good luck to you.

(in reply to SylvereApLeanan)

Post #: 10

RE: Newly dominant wife seeks help with husband. - 10/4/2013 11:52:27 PM

TigressLily

Posts: 436
Status: offline

Mandy, I'd like to ask whether your husband consensually agrees to forced feminization. This is your husband, not merely a play partner. Nothing wrong with wanting a personal & sexual slave to attend to you, but once you've sissified him, you may find he doesn't turn you on anymore. Have you both discussed cuckolding and is he on board with that? because that's where your lifestyle could end up heading.

quote:

ORIGINAL: MarineGuy4U

basically I'm wanting to turn my husband into not only a complete sissy but my sexual slave and personal slave . . . to better my personal daily life.

I don't know to what extent your husband wants what you have indicated you want. As long as you are both on the same page, that's fine. My late husband was my sub but it was a gradual process, and our dynamic was more like a roller-coaster ride at various intervals. I could have done things differently, but I never tried to force him to do anything he wasn't ready to do whole-heartedly. Half-*ssed, one-sided enthusiasm doesn't excite me. It's not worth risking ruining your marriage over.

Can't help you with your objectives. I'm not the least bit attracted to effeminate men or to women. I like them submissive while retaining their masculinity and virility. Any sissification I've ever done has been while administering Domestic Discipline, such as having my partner wear pink underwear while getting a spanking, which only works if this causes him to feel humiliated, not if he enjoys it too much.

_____________________________

* * * Not A Fetish/Kink Delivery System * * *

_____________________________

That Orbed Maiden with White Fire Layden
Whom Mortals Shall Call the Moon ~ Lord Byron
She Moves in Mysterious Ways . . . On Your Knees, Boy. ~ U2

(in reply to MarineGuy4U)

Post #: 11

RE: Newly dominant wife seeks help with husband. - 10/5/2013 12:51:35 AM

PrincessDonna11

Posts: 289
Joined: 8/7/2011
Status: offline

So true TL the panty thing only works when I need to remind them who's in control it doesn't take long as I use alligator clips as nipple clamps... MG: Your a Female so it's pretty simple 'eh not rocket science...

(in reply to TigressLily)

Post #: 12

RE: Newly dominant wife seeks help with husband. - 10/5/2013 6:24:05 AM

mnottertail

Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline

From your profile. . .

I am new to this lifestyle and I would love to get in touch with other Dominants (Female Only) so I can better transform my husband. To get an idea I basically want to turn my husband into not only a complete sissy but my sexual slave and personal slave (shaving my legs, painting my nails, holdin my bags while shopping) and things like that to better my personal daily life.

Holding your bags while shopping can be done by a garden gnome, not a big deal.

Here is your sissy though, if you are gonna have him do that to you, he can get experience by doing it to him, and can see how to keep from slashing you when he shaves his legs, the pressures, the things like that. Painting his own nails should keep him inside the lines and so on.. . . . .

And THEN girlfriend can work on you.

_____________________________

Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30

(in reply to PrincessDonna11)

Post #: 13

RE: Newly dominant wife seeks help with husband. - 10/5/2013 10:36:30 AM

SpyUnderCover

Posts: 208
Joined: 6/21/2010
Status: offline

The Frugal Domme has a whole page with links to lots of techniques and scene ideas.

Spy

(in reply to mnottertail)

Post #: 14

RE: Newly dominant wife seeks help with husband. - 10/6/2013 12:17:07 PM

njlauren

Posts: 1577
Joined: 10/1/2011
Status: offline

I think from reading your post what troubles me is asking how you 'change' your husband into your sissy sex slave, etc.The problem with 'forced feminization' and so forth is that it more fiction then reality, the stories have the wife transforming the husband, feminizing him, and then she is suddenly pulling in 'big, masculine' men to fuck, which begs the question to me, was the feminization part of the game or to get hubby out of the way?

What I am trying to say is what others have said, why do you have to force hubby? If he is willing to be your slave, if he has indicated this excites him, you shouldn't have to train him,rather you would be guiding him to what he (and you) want. The cruel bitch feminizing her husband is a great story, but forced feminization in real life is usually wank fodder, when it does happen usually the hubby is already gender queer in some way and so forth.

My take? Talk to him about it and see if he shows any interest in it, and work from there, have him pain your nails, tell him what you want to do, build the d/s, and then see if he wants to go down that path.

(in reply to SpyUnderCover)

Post #: 15

RE: Newly dominant wife seeks help with husband. - 10/6/2013 1:21:42 PM

TigressLily

Posts: 436
Status: offline

I'm so grateful that you went there. Inconclusive at best, but there is a bisexual element I've detected with both forced feminization & cuckolding.

quote:

ORIGINAL: njlauren

I think from reading your post what troubles me is asking how you 'change' your husband into your sissy sex slave, etc.... which begs the question to me, was the feminization part of the game or to get hubby out of the way?

when it does happen usually the hubby is already gender queer in some way and so forth.

Two components that seem to go hand in hand with the sissification dynamic is where the man wants to be treated like a girl but needs someone to "force" him into his conceptualized version of what girlish behavior & mannerisms are in a ritualized fashion by wearing ultra-feminine dress and so forth (women's sweats sets aren't going to hack it). Usually he also wants to be treated like a dirty slut/whore, humiliated and sexually violated. I have a friend who is an exception to the second part; he was sissified by two Mistresses, first by his college girlfriend with whom he did have sexual relations, then was turned into a chastity slave by a Mistress who never had any sexual relations with him. He didn't want to be mistreated (although he allowed that Mistress to lock him up in a dogcage, where she left him overnight or for hours during the day while she went out shopping--he didn't view that as mistreatment at the time); he wanted to be treated with kid gloves, or expected kinder treatment as a 'young girl'.

Another component has to do with (consensually) forced bisexuality. By being "forced," the man absolves himself of the personal responsibility of performing any homosexual acts or having them performed on him either by proxy or by another man. That's where the cuckolding dynamic comes into the picture, although there are more complexities involved with the cuckolding lifestyle.

What troubles me the most is that I'm hearing "me-me-me" which makes me question what is her husband's input. She's newer to BDSM than he is, so he might be so happy to have his wife show an interest in dominating him that he'll go along with whatever she wants at this point, whether he's into it or not, or whether these were ideas that he planted into her head. There needs to be quid pro quo which can't be assumed as a given.

_____________________________

* * * Not A Fetish/Kink Delivery System * * *

_____________________________

That Orbed Maiden with White Fire Layden
Whom Mortals Shall Call the Moon ~ Lord Byron
She Moves in Mysterious Ways . . . On Your Knees, Boy. ~ U2

(in reply to njlauren)

Post #: 16

RE: Newly dominant wife seeks help with husband. - 10/6/2013 1:52:15 PM

lovmuffin

Posts: 3759
Joined: 9/28/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: njlauren

I think from reading your post what troubles me is asking how you 'change' your husband into your sissy sex slave, etc.The problem with 'forced feminization' and so forth is that it more fiction then reality, the stories have the wife transforming the husband, feminizing him, and then she is suddenly pulling in 'big, masculine' men to fuck, which begs the question to me, was the feminization part of the game or to get hubby out of the way?

What I am trying to say is what others have said, why do you have to force hubby? If he is willing to be your slave, if he has indicated this excites him, you shouldn't have to train him,rather you would be guiding him to what he (and you) want. The cruel bitch feminizing her husband is a great story, but forced feminization in real life is usually wank fodder, when it does happen usually the hubby is already gender queer in some way and so forth.

My take? Talk to him about it and see if he shows any interest in it, and work from there, have him pain your nails, tell him what you want to do, build the d/s, and then see if he wants to go down that path.

From the OP and looking at her profile page, my guess is that her husband has already shown or communicated an interest in this. I would also venture to guess that as much as she wants to dominate him she is having trouble asserting herself or is not quite comfortable doing so just yet.

Also I might add that as far as my life is concerned, forced feminization has been more of a reality as apposed to fiction, or at least has paralleled some of the fiction that's out there. I'm thankful though that the reality hasn't included any big masculine men to fuck either her or me.

(in reply to njlauren)

Post #: 17

RE: Newly dominant wife seeks help with husband. - 10/6/2013 4:24:07 PM

Rochsub2009

Posts: 2536
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: TigressLily

....... there is a bisexual element I've detected with both forced feminization & cuckolding.

TigressLily,
I almost always agree with you, and I think we see D/s very similarly. However, in this case I need to mention that NOT ALL cuckolding situations involve bisexuality. I have been in several cuckold relationships, but have NEVER engaged in bisexuality. Cuckold sex can simply be between the Domme and her lover. The cuckolded male doesn't have to perform "clean up" duty. Frankly, I was never even present.

Some cuckolded men may choose to watch or participate, but others (like me) accept it because it pleases Her to maintain Her sexual freedom. But as part of our agreement, we ask to not be forced to participate, watch, or hear any of the details. Frankly, that's the only way cuckolding is acceptable to me. Participating (or even watching) is a hard limit for me.

Frankly, IMO, "cucks" who want to watch or participate are often not cucks at all. Instead, they're really voyeurs or closet bisexuals. There's nothing wrong with being either of those things, but I often see them mislabeled as "cuckolds". But of course, that's a different discussion.

< Message edited by Rochsub2009 -- 10/6/2013 4:26:43 PM >

(in reply to TigressLily)

Post #: 18

RE: Newly dominant wife seeks help with husband. - 10/6/2013 5:16:45 PM

TigressLily

Posts: 436
Status: offline

Which is why I added to that particular example: "That's where the cuckolding dynamic comes into the picture, although there are more complexities involved with the cuckolding lifestyle." I already felt I was pushing the envelope by bringing cuckolding into this discussion. It deserves a separate thread of its own since there are so many variables.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Rochsub2009

I need to mention that NOT ALL cuckolding situations involve bisexuality.

Some cuckolded men may choose to watch or participate, but others (like me) accept it because it pleases Her to maintain Her sexual freedom.

Frankly, IMO, "cucks" who want to watch or participate are often not cucks at all. Instead, they're really voyeurs or closet bisexuals.

As an aside, you have a sweetly diplomatic way of disagreeing. I've seen your form of participation evolve or devolve into more active participation. Take an informal survey of anyone you know who started out with threesomes not turning into three-ways or even orgiastic group sex down the road. That's why I don't play with matches.

_____________________________

* * * Not A Fetish/Kink Delivery System * * *

_____________________________

That Orbed Maiden with White Fire Layden
Whom Mortals Shall Call the Moon ~ Lord Byron
She Moves in Mysterious Ways . . . On Your Knees, Boy. ~ U2

(in reply to Rochsub2009)

Post #: 19

RE: Newly dominant wife seeks help with husband. - 10/6/2013 10:05:24 PM

Rochsub2009

Posts: 2536
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: TigressLily

you have a sweetly diplomatic way of disagreeing.

Thank you.

As a sub, I have learned how to disagree without being disrespectful or disagreeable. IMO, that's an important trait in a sub.

quote:

I've seen your form of participation evolve or devolve into more active participation. Take an informal survey of anyone you know who started out with threesomes not turning into three-ways or even orgiastic group sex down the road. That's why I don't play with matches.

I have had many opportunities for the situation to "devolve" as you called it, but it seldom did. Three-ways and orgies simply aren't my thing. I'm extremely loyal, even when my Domme chooses to maintain her sexual freedom. I'm just hard-wired to be a loyal monogamist. Several former Dommes have found that that trait made me ripe for a cuckolding dynamic. But I also tend to be very jealous. That's why I prefer to not watch or hear any details.

I have had a few Fmm three-somes, but there was no bisexuality involved. Moreover, it was Her idea, not mine. I would have preferred to avoid the scene altogether. But what's a sub to do when having 2 men pleasure her is one of your Domme's fantasies?

I'm not one of those guys who begs to be cuckolded. Cuckolding is difficult for me. But if I know that it pleases her, I will accept it. But I can respect the fact that you choose to simply not "play with matches".

quote:

I was pushing the envelope by bringing cuckolding into this discussion. It deserves a separate thread of its own since there are so many variables.

Have you ever seen this thread? Cuckolding thread

< Message edited by Rochsub2009 -- 10/6/2013 10:23:01 PM >

(in reply to TigressLily)

Post #: 20

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