Match.com mixed reviews

Match.com mixed reviews (Full Version)

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EasyE -> Match.com mixed reviews (10/7/2013 8:56:25 PM)
My last kink relationship ended several months ago. It was fairly long term at 9 months (yes that is long term for my age group) so I'm just getting serious about finding someone. Now the reason it ended was we were compatible in bed and kink, just not outside enough for me to continue loving her. The incompatibility outweighed to good after time and I lost the love for her. Regardless I am in favor of taking a multiple path approach to finding someone, as my goal is first and foremost long term love. A close second is the kink element. I tend to believe more people are interested in BDSM just not comfortable with the idea to be on here. Without further adieu, has anyone tried match.com as a paying member? By the numbers its the number one dating site on the web. The quality of members seems high. It also tops many best dating site polls. However, I have read a lot of reviews that its a rip off as well. It seems like those are written by frustrated single men. Probably 50 year olds that can't get the 18 yo they want, lol. But seriously what are your thoughts? BTW I am on FetLife for community, ALT sucks now, and do go out to bars and all the old fashion methods, like I said multiple approaches.

SweetAnise -> RE: Match.com mixed reviews (10/7/2013 9:06:22 PM)
So you ended your relationship with her because you were compatible in kink but not outside the bedroom. It sounds like to me the relationship was based solely on sex. Sex usually doesn't gain enough strength for staying power. Once she gave it up...you lost interest in her. So now you want to go on Match.com and find someone vanilla? Then you will complain the person doesn't match your kink enough. It sounds like you need to find or date yourself for a little bit and figure out what it is you really want in a RELATIONSHIP.

DarkSteven -> RE: Match.com mixed reviews (10/7/2013 9:07:30 PM)
So you're using multiple sites and bars. You're on Fet for community. Use it to find Michigan groups and attend them. I wouldn't use Match.com because meat life is so much easier and quicker.

seekingreality -> RE: Match.com mixed reviews (10/7/2013 11:09:19 PM)
Match.com is OK. So are POF and OKcupid (and they're free). I've met women on all three/

TigressLily -> RE: Match.com mixed reviews (10/8/2013 12:11:17 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: EasyE has anyone tried match.com as a paying member? You might have better luck there in Detroit, since there are social events hosted by Match to meet other members. None of these events are located anywhere near my area, so I've never attended one. As for the site itself, I consider it a dud. Speaking from a woman's perspective, there seem to be an inordinate amount of trawlers--men with near-blank profiles & no pics. Lots nearby but it doesn't do me much good. I haven't even logged in for going on a month now because I don't see the point. Money down the drain. You might have better success with OkCupid, which is free. Might not get local results, but there's a kink subculture on there. Do a search for "sub" and some interesting profiles may pop up. I came across more bisexual than straight women's profile results, though, when I was searching for male subs. Which btw I practically never do here, but on that site it's fun to compare answers and various test results. _____________________________ * * * Not A Fetish/Kink Delivery System * * *

ResidentSadist -> RE: Match.com mixed reviews (10/8/2013 4:43:40 AM)
Jump in your buggy, go to Royal Oak and visit Noir Leather. Pick up all the events flyers and underground magazine . . . that ought to give you plenty of paths. Oh yeah . . . and go shopping there. They have some awesome stuff.

graceadieu -> RE: Match.com mixed reviews (10/8/2013 7:24:06 AM)
I haven't used it, but 3 of my cousins met their spouses on there. So I think it can be a good way to meet people who are compatible with you outside of the bedroom. But if power exchange and/or kink is a must for you, I'm not sure if it's going to help you find someone compatible with you in that way.

Apocalypso -> RE: Match.com mixed reviews (10/8/2013 9:21:35 AM)
OKCupid is way better for BDSMers, although it's not as good as it used to be.

OsideGirl -> RE: Match.com mixed reviews (10/8/2013 9:42:22 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: EasyE However, I have read a lot of reviews that its a rip off as well. It seems like those are written by frustrated single men. Probably 50 year olds that can't get the 18 yo they want, lol. But seriously what are your thoughts? Nice assumption. My thought is that it's an internet site, which means it's going to have the same issues as any other internet dating site. Hell, we had 3 women in SoCal that were raped by a guy they met on Christian Mingle who used an alias. There is no fool proof method to ensure someone is not lying on the internet.

fucktoyprincess -> RE: Match.com mixed reviews (10/8/2013 2:24:40 PM)
I think it is perfectly possible to find someone who has BDSM interests on a vanilla site (many of my friends into BDSM are on both vanilla and BDSM sites). However, the success you have will partly depend on how you write your profile. Meaning that I wouldn't go on a vanilla site pretending to be vanilla. If I were you, I would write my profile in such a way to clearly indicate that you have sexual interests that are alternative. You can either be vague, i.e., I have sexual interests that are more alternative, please ask me about them OR be explicit, i.e., I am seriously into BDSM and would prefer to find someone who understands that world and the dynamics and play involved in it. And, of course, if you are comfortable, you can even be more explicit about your specific interests. The one thing I would NOT recommend doing is trying to "convert" a vanilla person. In my opinion, it is NOT possible. In this day and age (post 50 Shades), I think a lot of women have an inkling about whether this is something they might be interested in trying out. But again, remember, if someone tries this stuff out and it doesn't click for them - it means they are vanilla. And there is no way to really change that. Don't confuse the person who wants to experiment with someone who is actually wired for BDSM. I think searching in as many venues as possible is important. If the cost of Match is an issue then I would recommend going with "vanilla" dating sites that are free. I don't see how anything bad could come of trying out other venues.....[sm=2cents.gif]

kiwisub12 -> RE: Match.com mixed reviews (10/8/2013 3:36:26 PM)
I found my sweetie on adultfriendfinders.com I had a kink profile which probably helped. [:)]

EasyE -> RE: Match.com mixed reviews (10/8/2013 4:09:02 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SweetAnise So you ended your relationship with her because you were compatible in kink but not outside the bedroom. It sounds like to me the relationship was based solely on sex. Sex usually doesn't gain enough strength for staying power. Once she gave it up...you lost interest in her. So now you want to go on Match.com and find someone vanilla? Then you will complain the person doesn't match your kink enough. It sounds like you need to find or date yourself for a little bit and figure out what it is you really want in a RELATIONSHIP. No I lost interest when the impracticalities of long term with the person became apparent. I got her to give it up on second date. But sex isn't the only thing I'm after. Love is, and much harder to find than sex.

EasyE -> RE: Match.com mixed reviews (10/8/2013 4:10:44 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ResidentSadist Jump in your buggy, go to Royal Oak and visit Noir Leather. Pick up all the events flyers and underground magazine . . . that ought to give you plenty of paths. Oh yeah . . . and go shopping there. They have some awesome stuff. Great store. Haven't been shopping in awhile. Maybe its time to drop in.

kalikshama -> RE: Match.com mixed reviews (10/8/2013 4:15:35 PM)
My free membership on Match was a bust. Years ago, I had some success on Alt, but not when I tried it again in 2010. I made some friends via Fet, but my one potential turned out to have a serious drinking problem. I've met lots of great kinky people on this site, and more relationship oriented men on OKCupid.

frazzle -> RE: Match.com mixed reviews (10/8/2013 5:51:14 PM)
There are "free" sites. Idiots, liars etc are rampant on all of them. the site that advertise, all your matches, but cant contact til you pay?? the contacts disappear until your payment is up for renewal. they buy lists from all over. I was shocked recently to find, dating site profiles are so badly sold children turn up on them

SubvsSlave -> RE: Match.com mixed reviews (10/8/2013 8:12:13 PM)
I was on Match.com for awhile but wasn't able to make any connections on there. If I found someone that interested me, they weren't interested in me and vice versa. It was very frustrating and I was about to give up the search. In an odd twist of events, someone told me about this website and thought I should check it out. I had led a vanilla life up to that point and had not a clue that there was anything like this wonderful world of BDSM out there. I ended up taking a chance with someone that was way outside my age group that I usually gravitate towards. I am so happy that I did because we have been together over two years. The main thing that I wanted to say was perhaps you should seek out someone that wouldn't normally match the criteria that you have had in the past. I wish you luck in your search.

ResidentSadist -> RE: Match.com mixed reviews (10/10/2013 1:52:48 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: EasyE quote: ORIGINAL: ResidentSadist Jump in your buggy, go to Royal Oak and visit Noir Leather. Pick up all the events flyers and underground magazine . . . that ought to give you plenty of paths. Oh yeah . . . and go shopping there. They have some awesome stuff. Great store. Haven't been shopping in awhile. Maybe its time to drop in. Kieth runs the place, great guy . . . and yes, I think it is a great store too.

BossyShoeBitch -> RE: Match.com mixed reviews (10/15/2013 8:10:03 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: fucktoyprincess I think it is perfectly possible to find someone who has BDSM interests on a vanilla site (many of my friends into BDSM are on both vanilla and BDSM sites). However, the success you have will partly depend on how you write your profile. Meaning that I wouldn't go on a vanilla site pretending to be vanilla. If I were you, I would write my profile in such a way to clearly indicate that you have sexual interests that are alternative. You can either be vague, i.e., I have sexual interests that are more alternative, please ask me about them OR be explicit, i.e., I am seriously into BDSM and would prefer to find someone who understands that world and the dynamics and play involved in it. And, of course, if you are comfortable, you can even be more explicit about your specific interests. The one thing I would NOT recommend doing is trying to "convert" a vanilla person. In my opinion, it is NOT possible. In this day and age (post 50 Shades), I think a lot of women have an inkling about whether this is something they might be interested in trying out. But again, remember, if someone tries this stuff out and it doesn't click for them - it means they are vanilla. And there is no way to really change that. Don't confuse the person who wants to experiment with someone who is actually wired for BDSM. I think searching in as many venues as possible is important. If the cost of Match is an issue then I would recommend going with "vanilla" dating sites that are free. I don't see how anything bad could come of trying out other venues.....[sm=2cents.gif] I agree completely and I really respect that you are looking for love and a real relationship? I have had a fair bit of luck in the past on Match meeting men who are into this lifestyle but most importantly I met my Sir (the love of my life that I had been searching for my entire life) on Match.com. It's fairly easy to write your profile in such a way that people who are into this stuff will "get it" while vanilla people will often misinterpret it. For example, my tag line was, "Looking for people who are not vanilla". The people who know what it means to be vanilla tended to be BDSMer's. When I got responses like, " I like chocolate, etc..." I was able to quickly weed them out.

EasyE -> RE: Match.com mixed reviews (10/15/2013 8:50:09 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: BossyShoeBitch quote: ORIGINAL: fucktoyprincess I think it is perfectly possible to find someone who has BDSM interests on a vanilla site (many of my friends into BDSM are on both vanilla and BDSM sites). However, the success you have will partly depend on how you write your profile. Meaning that I wouldn't go on a vanilla site pretending to be vanilla. If I were you, I would write my profile in such a way to clearly indicate that you have sexual interests that are alternative. You can either be vague, i.e., I have sexual interests that are more alternative, please ask me about them OR be explicit, i.e., I am seriously into BDSM and would prefer to find someone who understands that world and the dynamics and play involved in it. And, of course, if you are comfortable, you can even be more explicit about your specific interests. The one thing I would NOT recommend doing is trying to "convert" a vanilla person. In my opinion, it is NOT possible. In this day and age (post 50 Shades), I think a lot of women have an inkling about whether this is something they might be interested in trying out. But again, remember, if someone tries this stuff out and it doesn't click for them - it means they are vanilla. And there is no way to really change that. Don't confuse the person who wants to experiment with someone who is actually wired for BDSM. I think searching in as many venues as possible is important. If the cost of Match is an issue then I would recommend going with "vanilla" dating sites that are free. I don't see how anything bad could come of trying out other venues.....[sm=2cents.gif] I agree completely and I really respect that you are looking for love and a real relationship? I have had a fair bit of luck in the past on Match meeting men who are into this lifestyle but most importantly I met my Sir (the love of my life that I had been searching for my entire life) on Match.com. It's fairly easy to write your profile in such a way that people who are into this stuff will "get it" while vanilla people will often misinterpret it. For example, my tag line was, "Looking for people who are not vanilla". The people who know what it means to be vanilla tended to be BDSMer's. When I got responses like, " I like chocolate, etc..." I was able to quickly weed them out. I like chocholate, lol. You gotta give them points for effort though. Would you say the paid aspect of Match tends to bring more serious people rather than free. My problem with OKCupid is it seemed like it was a hobby or just a curiosity to most. Not many wanted to move from online to dating. I realize there is technique to this and I can pull it off here and elsewhere so I don't thing its me.

BossyShoeBitch -> RE: Match.com mixed reviews (10/15/2013 9:17:05 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: BossyShoeBitch I agree completely and I really respect that you are looking for love and a real relationship? Argh! No clue why there is a question mark there. I hate typos!

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