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sheisreeds -> RE: Finding a New Partner (10/20/2013 12:50:13 PM)
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The right relationship comes when you know who you are, and have confronted your own demons. Then the right person tends to come along no matter what kind of relationship it is.
The year after my divorce was a lengthy process of figuring myself and what really mattered. I made tons mistakes, had a shit ton of fun, cried a lot, discovered a lot, and at times was down right disturbed by my own thoughts and behavior.
I reached a point of surrender, and have been with the same amazing asshole for the past 5 years.
Also, FYI, my partner and I both came from divorces and we were both completely fucked in the head for the first year or so of our relationship. It was a lot of work do things right, and a lot of work to repair all the damage we both had.
Also, while I was connected with the BDSM community, I did not meet my partner that way. We met on a vanilla site, which mentioned nothing of my predilections, nor his, and we were just chatting about how horrible divorce is in our fine state.
BDSM did not come up until he almost bit a hole in my jeans, then we had a talk.
The other thing to keep in mind is that life happens, there is so much more to the right partner than whether or not their into BDSM, and when we are true to who we are as human beings we have a much higher likelihood of meeting the right people.
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