REAL MASTER'S HELP, PLEASE: (Full Version)

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amonlyaslave -> REAL MASTER'S HELP, PLEASE: (10/17/2013 2:25:23 PM)

Masters, what is the BEST advice could you give a “vanilla” man (so he can comprehend) what it takes to be a GENUINE MASTER? He wants to learn on HOW to be a Master, and wants someone to tell him how he can!




RedMagic1 -> RE: REAL MASTER'S HELP, PLEASE: (10/17/2013 2:33:37 PM)

Step 1: That he ask for help himself.

...unless you're really hoping he will turn into your personal service top. Which is fine by me -- I've service-topped women and we both enjoyed it. But there's something off about someone who "am only a slave" asking this question.




DesFIP -> RE: REAL MASTER'S HELP, PLEASE: (10/17/2013 2:39:48 PM)

Top of this page, BDSM Book List.

Beyond that, read here and figure out what he's interested in and what he isn't. Then he can read and learn more about what does attract him.

Your job is to be his cheerleader. To be grateful and appreciative for whatever dominance and topping he wants to use.

But if you're going to criticize him for needing to take a year to get over the dichotomy of how he can be pleasing someone by making them cry, then you would do better to end it now. Because it is difficult for someone new and it takes a long time. Accept that.




DarkSteven -> RE: REAL MASTER'S HELP, PLEASE: (10/17/2013 6:03:17 PM)

Being a Master requires integrity, and being strong enough to take care of yourself and a slave at the same time.

Knowing bondage, whips, sensation play, flogging, and spanking doesn't hurt either.




JeffBC -> RE: REAL MASTER'S HELP, PLEASE: (10/17/2013 8:37:46 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: amonlyaslave
Masters, what is the BEST advice could you give a “vanilla” man (so he can comprehend) what it takes to be a GENUINE MASTER? He wants to learn on HOW to be a Master, and wants someone to tell him how he can!

That depends on what you mean by a "genuine master". It also depends on where he is starting from. For me, it was simply the realization that I was a leader in all other aspects of my life and there was no particular reason to think leading in my home wouldn't turn out well. Mostly, I just had to draw the parallels to common, every day vanilla activities that I do all the time. I also had to realize that Carol is very much a submissive personality. In her own words, "she prefers to defer". Conversely, I tend to find myself in leadership situations... a "natural born leader". So for us, there was a fair bit of simply acknowledging that which was.

It'd be easier to post useful advice if he was asking specific questions himself.




Masterlikes31 -> RE: REAL MASTER'S HELP, PLEASE: (10/17/2013 9:33:08 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: amonlyaslave

Masters, what is the BEST advice could you give a “vanilla” man (so he can comprehend) what it takes to be a GENUINE MASTER? He wants to learn on HOW to be a Master, and wants someone to tell him how he can!


Trial and error..lol. Honestly, the best way for you to learn the basics is to find a vanilla sub. Learn together, then you don't need to worry with living up to a seasoned sub's standards. This is not something you learn to be either, this is something that is inside you. A alpha male. Also, being a "master" is not about making your sub do as you please. She or he needs to want to please you. That takes work on your end. Oh...lose the amonlyaslave name...not a good start. Best of luck to you!




LadyPact -> RE: REAL MASTER'S HELP, PLEASE: (10/17/2013 10:25:27 PM)

An Alpha MALE? Are you quite sure?

~~~~~

To the OP,

I don't know if the quest for Mastery is related to an outside influence. If it is in your situation, and he follows through with commitment and education and doing what he does because it is greater than himself, that's pretty cool in My book.

What's the best advice that I would give? I would encourage his participation in the leather community. No, it's not the path that most people take, but I know where I came from.




Masterlikes31 -> RE: REAL MASTER'S HELP, PLEASE: (10/17/2013 10:34:11 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

An Alpha MALE? Are you quite sure?

~~~~~

To the OP,

I don't know if the quest for Mastery is related to an outside influence. If it is in your situation, and he follows through with commitment and education and doing what he does because it is greater than himself, that's pretty cool in My book.

What's the best advice that I would give? I would encourage his participation in the leather community. No, it's not the path that most people take, but I know where I came from.



Hmm, well i've never known a dom who wasn't a strong male or female.




LadyPact -> RE: REAL MASTER'S HELP, PLEASE: (10/17/2013 10:41:04 PM)

A lesson learned. Don't be so sure that *MALES* alone learn Mastery.




Masterlikes31 -> RE: REAL MASTER'S HELP, PLEASE: (10/17/2013 11:19:05 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

A lesson learned. Don't be so sure that *MALES* alone learn Mastery.



*Smiles* I was speaking from my point of view. I know that there are just as many alpha women as men. I was in no way being sexist if that is how it came off to you.




LadyPact -> RE: REAL MASTER'S HELP, PLEASE: (10/18/2013 12:38:20 AM)

Of course..... Of course.

Though, in our future dealings, I prefer to avoid that "alpha female" thing. I'm not leading a pack of wolves here.

Gender aside, I happen to be a selfish prick. I wouldn't have invested Myself to embark on Mastery (or the attempt of such) for the sake of somebody else. Other people are far less self centered than, and far more noble, than I. Mastery, for Me, was more about My inner self.

Jeff, up there...... He's more the type to do the "Mastery for a partner" thing than I am. Then again, he's probably a better human being than Me.




Toysinbabeland -> RE: REAL MASTER'S HELP, PLEASE: (10/18/2013 12:44:47 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

Knowing bondage, whips, sensation play, flogging, and spanking doesn't hurt either.



Er, that depends upon which side of the kneel one is on....




SunTzuSwe -> RE: REAL MASTER'S HELP, PLEASE: (10/18/2013 4:38:07 AM)

Let's start at the beginning. What does HE want? What does he want to get out of it? What turns him on?
To be a master I'd say there are few bdsm attributes that are super important, regular vanilla attributes are imho way more important. Integrity, honesty, morale, stability, being responsible and trustworthy would be a good start. Anyone can swing a whip... Start with the internal attributes.




punisher440 -> RE: REAL MASTER'S HELP, PLEASE: (10/18/2013 6:11:46 AM)

OP...from my understanding of your question,you want a quick,simple answer on how to magically turn yourself into a dominant from a vanilla...it just isn't going to happen. Yes, you can slap a wolf's hide on a sheep but that doesn't turn the sheep into a wolf...a sheep is what it is and will be no matter how hard you try to change it. Of course you can learn the tricks of the trade[rope work,flogging,sensory deprivation,etc] but that does not make you dominant...only kinky. Like many others, I shy away from anyone declaring they are "real" or "genuine" Masters because each of us see things a little differently on how we go about our lives and what we do in them. That doesn't make any one way more genuine or real...only more right for the ones living it.




crazyml -> RE: REAL MASTER'S HELP, PLEASE: (10/18/2013 6:15:46 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: amonlyaslave

Masters, what is the BEST advice could you give a “vanilla” man (so he can comprehend) what it takes to be a GENUINE MASTER? He wants to learn on HOW to be a Master, and wants someone to tell him how he can!


The best advice I could possibly be would be "Be yourself."





D0MBLKMAN2Serve -> RE: REAL MASTER'S HELP, PLEASE: (1/1/2014 4:45:59 PM)

So he wants to be a master. Answer the following:
> Is he a man of principles? Do these principles ( if he is a man of principles) resonate with you
> Does he have the integrity and honesty needed for any kind of relationship?
> Is he a responsible man with huge reserves of patience?
> Is he capable ot taking care of himself whilst taking care of you and vice versa?Becoming a master is a highly responsible task, akin to the 'man' of the household. He will be looked up to by one and all. So ask yourself can he play this role in real life?

If the answer to all these questions are yes, then there are plenty of BDSM related literature that he can read up. Remember becoming a master is a journey. It will take time.




OsideGirl -> RE: REAL MASTER'S HELP, PLEASE: (1/1/2014 5:25:44 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: RedMagic1

Step 1: That he ask for help himself.


Seriously.....you can't learn it for him/her, they need to do it themselves.




Kana -> RE: REAL MASTER'S HELP, PLEASE: (1/1/2014 5:29:35 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: amonlyaslave

Masters, what is the BEST advice could you give a “vanilla” man (so he can comprehend) what it takes to be a GENUINE MASTER? He wants to learn on HOW to be a Master, and wants someone to tell him how he can!

He could:
A-Become ninja at the fine art of sending cock shots, and
B-Practice looking in the mirror and repeatedly saying, "Drop and suck, bitch."
C-Go to Bondage U,get a Masters degree




littlewonder -> RE: REAL MASTER'S HELP, PLEASE: (1/1/2014 5:44:15 PM)

.


[image]local://upfiles/134279/C54C6C484FBE440991158BE917E5B9CF.jpg[/image]




D0MBLKMAN2Serve -> RE: REAL MASTER'S HELP, PLEASE: (1/3/2014 11:42:09 AM)

Fuck could not agree more!! Well Done littlewonder!




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