RE: Pissed at Dom

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slavejali -> RE: Pissed at Dom (7/2/2006 10:44:20 PM)
What did he want you to do? There is one major thing I dislike Master asking me to do and thats clean up after his dog. I feel all icky when he asks me. I can just imagine the look on my face..but its in those times of doing stuff I really dont wanna do that I get all those feel good feelings of being his slave (not that I dont all the time but especially in those other times). I also get a sense of accomplishment after the task is done.

lokisgodhi -> RE: Pissed at Dom (7/3/2006 2:12:11 AM)
Littlepita wrote: "What do you do when you're pissed at your dominant? Mine has decided I should do something today that I totally don't want to do, and I frankly think he is being insensitive to me about it. Normally he is beyond wonderful to me and I know I shouldn't feel pissy about this, but I DO!! He knows there is something wrong and has been very sweet and asking if there is anything he can do. But, I'm not going to come out and tell him that the "thing" he is having me do is the thing that is making me grouchy. I personally think he knows very well what it is and it purposely ignoring it. Men....Doms....is there is a difference. Not always!!" Poison mushrooms. ;-)

Littlepita -> RE: Pissed at Dom (7/3/2006 6:11:36 AM)
Cowers under the harsh glares! OK!! I'm sorry I ranted about my most wonderful Dom! Actually I really am sorry. I shouldn't have come here and complained. My only excuse was that I was PMSing big time yesterday. And a girl friend from online whom I have never met came to visit us yesterday and I was all stressed with nerves over that. NOT an excuse I know!!! For those that are nosy and just have to know I will humble myself and tell you. I would want to know too. [;)] OK, my Dom wanted me to go down to the gate to let our friend into the apartment complex. It was like 95 degrees and I had on this short pink skirt that he loves me in. A skirt I might add that I haven't ever worn in public. I don't have the slimmest legs and I felt embarrassed and I was stressed over the fact that it was so hot and my thighs were going to get all sticky. I just didn't want to meet my friend like that. YES........this is all terribly silly and I feel completely juvenile. [&:] I should have talked to him. But, when he had first told me I would have to do this, I did ask why me and he said because he didn't want to. Well, that was the trigger to my getting pissy and pouty about it all. He has already met this girl friend and was wearing something better then I for parking lot walking in the sunshine! So, when he casually tells me after I write this rant that he will just go on down to the gate since he will be on the phone directing her to our apartment anyway, and asked if that would be alright with me, I was flabbergasted. He honestly didn't know that my being upset was because of this reason. He just thought it was the PMS and nerves and nothing he had done. We have talked about it and I really do need to learn to go to him with my feelings and not hold them in and feel resentment. I fully know how destructive and disrespectful to him that is. What can I say! I'm a new submissive and I am trying to learn to do this right. Lord knows I want to!! Thanks again to everyone that replied. Your advice and "harsh glares" were totally justified and I appreciate it. [:o]

Mercnbeth -> RE: Pissed at Dom (7/3/2006 6:32:34 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Littlepita ...What do you do when you're pissed at your dominant?... it has been over three years and this slave has not experienced "pissed at Dom", for anything. perhaps it's a perception thing, but this slave doesn't see the sense or the justification--this slave serves Master, in all things, so regardless of what it was He ordered this slave to do, "pissed" just isn't one of those things that is going to take place unless we are talking watersports and even then, this slave is all in for that[;)]!!! there are all sorts of things this slave does at Master's command. some are daily standing orders, on an ongoing basis--that this slave would absolutely not do, or choose to do if she was not serving Master, and being pissed at Him or "hating" Him for those things would be doing NOTHING productive toward this slave's service. serving Master is a privilege and an honor, therefore, a job well done is what this slave strives for, regardless of if she personally likes the task or not. quote: just a side note i forgot...i also have IHM days....i hate Master...lol....so take heart....it happens to us all....orig: Curioussdragnlily this slave will have to disagree, since this slave hasn't had any "IHM days", and does not believe you are a psychic, it really doesn't "happen to us all".

LuckyAlbatross -> RE: Pissed at Dom (7/3/2006 6:49:34 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Littlepita OK!! I'm sorry I ranted about my most wonderful Dom! Actually I really am sorry. I shouldn't have come here and complained. My only excuse was that I was PMSing big time yesterday. And a girl friend from online whom I have never met came to visit us yesterday and I was all stressed with nerves over that. NOT an excuse I know!!! Thanks again to everyone that replied. Your advice and "harsh glares" were totally justified and I appreciate it. [:o] The complaints and the rants are ok- ONLY after you've done the right things. It's ok to be irrational at times (as long as it's not continued, repeated and causing unnecessary stress on the relationship). In fact, in a new relationship, it's pretty much a given that you're going to come up against these bumps that you never anticipated. But instead of immediately shirking inside yourself, because you're ashamed of your feelings and seething- which only leads to ultimate resentment, NOT solving of the problem, and not open communication, you need to just be out with it. Your dom did the right thing- asking you what was wrong, asking to help, and you denied him what he deserved in return. In this specific situation, there may not have been time to go off to the side with your dom and say "OK I'm being insanely irrational here, but I really don't want to do that. Can we avoid it and talk about it later?" Trust me, you CAN get yourself to the point where saying something like that will be natural and easy. In a situation where you're faced with something immediately, and have an irrational reaction, try and look at the long term perspective of things. It won't literally kill you and you aren't that important to the world that traffic will stop even if they see 90% of your legs. And then just do it and talk about it later when there is opportunity.

Littlepita -> RE: Pissed at Dom (7/3/2006 10:20:21 AM)
Thank you LA. That is terrific advice and something I plan to take to heart and do with my Dom. We pride ourselves on our great ability to communicate and when I hold it in like I did yesterday, I realize what a big disservice I do to us both. I want a strong D/s relationship with this man and learning how to behave is paramount to our success. I will do better and be a good girl. [:)]

desertdancer -> RE: Pissed at Dom (7/3/2006 11:03:32 AM)
Dear Pita, I ran into a situation kinda like this last night with Master, as I posted before in this thread, Master always is asking me is there anything wrong, are you ok and as I posted this can irritate me because I feel that one I answer once, if he askes again he doesn't believe me. Last night I stubbornly and might I add brattily dug my feet in and told him I didn't like him asking me how I am all the time, which isn't nesacerily the truth, I think a big part of me loves it. Anyway he came back with asking " arent I important enough to you to always answer me and talk to me when I talk to you' And WHOAH that stopped me dead in my tracks. Of course he's important enough, not only that he is the most important person to me, ever. He deserves an answer to his questions, no matter how often he asks. He explained that he does believe me when I answer him, that it's not mistrust, but that he loves me so much that he just has to know how I'm doing and if we've changed the topic of conversation or changed doing one thing for another, he is asking how I feel about the new thing. Regardless of his whys for doing things, I learned that when Master asks a question, the important thing is that I answer and don't hold anything back. It's important in a relationship such as we have to always be open and be able to say anything your feeling. Good luck pita and I hope you had fun meeting yrou friend, and remember our thighs are never half as big as WE think they are [:)] ~dancer

justheather -> RE: Pissed at Dom (7/3/2006 1:33:38 PM)
1. It's ok to not want to do something. I think this is a valuable and handy concept to keep tucked in your pocket. 2. I cant quite get my head around the idea of posting something about my thoughts and feelings on a message board before my Dom knows about them. There have been times, especially once when we were dealing with something very new to me, that I have wanted to just go and post to the boards about it...sort of purge and work it out outisde my own head and get feedback (maybe validation even moreso than feedback) from people outside my relationship. So, what I did was compose a "post" to myself about the situation...all my fears and feelings...and tucked it away for later. I never posted it, but it served a few purposes. I had a recording of my thought processes and feelings at the time, in case I wanted to refer back to it in talking it over with my Dom, and reading it later on I was able to feel really validated in how far I had stepped out on a limb for the sake of "us" at a time I was really feeling quite afraid. I ended up deleting the email I had sent to myself in a mass mailbox purgeing but I did share the thoughts and feelings with him and I was glad I had already hashed them out in advance when I did. If my Dom had read those thoughts and feelings on a message board after I had already shared them with a bunch of people we dont really know (and some we do), I think he might have felt disappointed in me for not trusting him with my feelings and in himself for not inspiring my trust. It's tempting to run to the boards and vent, purge, whatever, but really in the long run I dont think it's the best place for me to work out my thoughts and feelings. Id rather bring something a little more formed to the group, after the fact, and ask for advice and feedback once Ive communicated as best I can with him about the situation. 3. I know I just said this wasnt the best place to do so, but it's been nice seeing you work through this and grow.

Daddysredhead -> RE: Pissed at Dom (7/4/2006 12:13:46 AM)
Dear Pita, I just wanted to say that while we are submissives or slaves, we are still human, with human emotions. I love Daddy with all my heart and sometimes I get frustrated at situations or when I don't think He understands me, but W/we talk. W/we do not live in the same house, so sometimes W/we make "dates" to go talk these things out, so hard feelings don't build up. He is amazing and I am fortunate to have someone who is willing to take the time to be with me and hash things out. It's those "emotional enemas" that purge the toxins out of the relationship. Highly recommended by this girlie and her Master. [:)] edited to add: PMS must be running rampant because I just read an e-mail from a fellow submissive/slave and she, like me, has been an emotional roller coaster of one this past week as well... poor Masters... lol... mine told me that I am so predictable this way... every four weeks I get aggitated at something really stupid (not at Him, though), then I cry for letting said stupid thing bother me... then a week later, His "babygirl" comes back to Him... smiling. (I didn't realize I was like clockwork, giggles)

ownedgirlie -> RE: Pissed at Dom (7/4/2006 12:16:33 AM)
Emotional enema - what a great term :)

Daddysredhead -> RE: Pissed at Dom (7/4/2006 12:23:05 AM)
thank you, OG... (hands her bottle of magic elixir... "use liberally") lol...

ownedgirlie -> RE: Pissed at Dom (7/4/2006 1:30:41 AM)
Hahahaha...um...thanks. :)

RavenMuse -> RE: Pissed at Dom (7/4/2006 3:25:52 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Littlepita What do you do when you're pissed at your dominant? Mine has decided I should do something today that I totally don't want to do, and I frankly think he is being insensitive to me about it. Normally he is beyond wonderful to me and I know I shouldn't feel pissy about this, but I DO!! My girl isn't you and I'm not him but all I can do in responce to this is state how I would expect my girl to act if put in a similar situation. I would expect (And frankly be disapointed in her if she didn't) come to me and appropriatly ask "Why?" as well as explaining her side of what she felt was unfair or insensitive. Chances are I would already know how difficult it was for her, how uncomfortable she would be and the answer would be a quick explination of why I wanted it done and her getting told to run along and get on with it. However, there is also the possibility that the point of what I was doing was to get her to come to me, to discuss what was making her uncomfortable. She wouldn't know which it was until she did so, all she knows is that I am not the type to tell her to do something I know to be difficult unless I have a reason to do so and it isn't always obvious to her what that reason is unless she asks.

truesub4u -> RE: Pissed at Dom (7/4/2006 8:36:16 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ownedgirlie Hahahaha...um...thanks. :) Don't look at me... She gave it too you...LOL

ownedgirlie -> RE: Pissed at Dom (7/4/2006 8:40:51 AM)
Keep it up, and we'll be sharing it [;)]

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