LDR Tasks

LDR Tasks (Full Version)

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EasyE -> LDR Tasks (11/1/2013 5:48:17 PM)
I have a potential sub and we have been talking for several weeks. I have verified her in several ways and she's cleared all the usual red flags.I NEVER wanted to get into a LDR, because all I want is RT. Her profile zip was old and is now a few states away. We will start seeing each other soon, with the understanding she will move out here if things are going that well. Now I know you're thinking that's not fair. I am tied down by a career and she isn't yet, hers will be in healthcare so she is more adaptable too. Her interests are Anal, Outdoor, Discreet Public, Toys, Vibrators, Breast Bondage, Biting, Hair pulling, Nipple Torture, Pussy Torture, Swallowing, High Heels, Following Orders, Housework, Orgasm Control and Denial, Oral, Riding Horse, Tens (she has one too), Whipping, Severe Pain Very high sex drive as well. She isn't too interested in the service aspect per say. She is more interested in the aspect of being used, pain, rough sex, and humiliation. So my goal is not to train her, but to give her something to remind her of those interests and make her wet when she thinks of it throughout the day. Any help is appreciated.

SeekingTrinity -> RE: LDR Tasks (11/1/2013 6:19:32 PM)
Dude, you are in a relationship with her. You've talked with her, you know her, she looks to you. It's YOUR relationship. You talked with her, I haven't. Do you honestly want to represent yourself as nothing more than the user of everyone else's ideas? To me, that is being misleading because the reality is Im not going to be in the bed with the both of you for however long your relationship lasts...telling you what to do...and you performing like my trained monkey. I don't know shit about her, nor anything about you. How on Earth am I going to know anything about what would work or fail on an epic level? You dig what Im saying?

lizi -> RE: LDR Tasks (11/1/2013 6:56:55 PM)
We've had threads like this before, and I have to say that usually it's brought up that the sub has to work, and making her crotch wet at work is interfering with her ability to perform her job well - especially as it is in the medical field. If she's got to have the titillation factor, then set it up so it's outside of work hours. Anything during work has the potential as well to set her up for not doing the very best at her job and potentially interfering with her livelihood. I dunno, I'm kind of bad at this as I've never had to do it for sexual stuff, my tasks as a submissive have always been rooted in daily life instead (packing, researching, shopping, going back to school, etc). How about the usual, scheduled masturbation, forced chastity, journaling, taking selfies for you during whatever she's doing as 'proof', writing erotic fiction, etc.

DesFIP -> RE: LDR Tasks (11/1/2013 10:09:09 PM)
Make her set up a study schedule and do well in her courses. Because playing with herself isn't helping to prepare her to be able to move to you with a good job ahead.

EasyE -> RE: LDR Tasks (11/2/2013 5:07:04 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SeekingTrinity Dude, you are in a relationship with her. You've talked with her, you know her, she looks to you. It's YOUR relationship. You talked with her, I haven't. Do you honestly want to represent yourself as nothing more than the user of everyone else's ideas? To me, that is being misleading because the reality is Im not going to be in the bed with the both of you for however long your relationship lasts...telling you what to do...and you performing like my trained monkey. I don't know shit about her, nor anything about you. How on Earth am I going to know anything about what would work or fail on an epic level? You dig what Im saying? I agree using the term relationship at this stage is false. We haven't met yet. So I have no disillusions about that. I belive asking for ideas and brainstorming is a far cry from misrepresenting yourself and creativity. I've never done long distance, so its natural to seek ideas. I'm the one filtering them and making them my own. I don't need any help in RT.

EasyE -> RE: LDR Tasks (11/2/2013 5:12:53 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: lizi We've had threads like this before, and I have to say that usually it's brought up that the sub has to work, and making her crotch wet at work is interfering with her ability to perform her job well - especially as it is in the medical field. If she's got to have the titillation factor, then set it up so it's outside of work hours. Anything during work has the potential as well to set her up for not doing the very best at her job and potentially interfering with her livelihood. I dunno, I'm kind of bad at this as I've never had to do it for sexual stuff, my tasks as a submissive have always been rooted in daily life instead (packing, researching, shopping, going back to school, etc). How about the usual, scheduled masturbation, forced chastity, journaling, taking selfies for you during whatever she's doing as 'proof', writing erotic fiction, etc. She is only working part time. I of course would take this into account. I make life and death decisions everyday and have seen first hand the consequences of these distractions. I was thinking some simple reminders like a piece of jewelry or doing a daily task different than normal as a reminder. Sure I am going to totally order a vibease for morning makeups but would ensure not to activate it while driving or working for instance. DESFip, she's done with college for now, has BS just needs to get a few more classes for the specialty she wants and is having a tough time getting that going. I agree with school coming first. Limiting distractions is the only way I got to my career.

OsideGirl -> RE: LDR Tasks (11/2/2013 9:45:17 AM)
[8\|]

AthenaSurrenders -> RE: LDR Tasks (11/2/2013 10:01:51 AM)
You're not together physically, and have not yet met, so you aren't yet working on the practical arrangements to get together. She's not interested in service, and you're not looking to train her to do anything specific for you. So what's left here is essentially web-cam sex sessions, right? Nothing wrong with that, but I don't know how we can possibly help you out. Only you know what turns her on, and what turns you on, and what is realistic for her situation. You already have a list of activities right there in your OP. I'm not being awkward, I just can't think what kind of suggestions you are hoping to get. It's pretty much going to be masturbating for each other, exchanging dirty stories and fantasies, or performing self-bondage or self-inflicted pain for you to watch. How you do it depends entirely on what gets you both off.

OsideGirl -> RE: LDR Tasks (11/2/2013 11:19:35 AM)
Thank you Athena. You put into words what would have come out as very snarky from me.

littlewonder -> RE: LDR Tasks (11/2/2013 12:09:14 PM)
She's not into service you said so basically she likes to play. Nothing wrong with that but the only thing that's gonna get her wet is playing with herself, bondage, anal, whatever her other favorites are. I personally don't know except telling her to put in a plug or something. Then again, I never really did any of this stuff while we were long distance.

DesFIP -> RE: LDR Tasks (11/2/2013 12:50:32 PM)
So you know that she needs to work on getting her classes to get the job she wants. But you aren't demanding she goes to visit all the local schools to find out who has these courses? You know that distraction will prevent her from accomplishing this yet you want to cater to her desire to be distracted? And I'm assuming that the verification was web camming. You do know that she can send you a porn web cam session instead of doing it herself? If you like her as a person, then plan a long weekend in her town and meet for coffee. Stay in a hotel and have a list of local sights you want to see. If you get along, she can visit them with you. If not, you still have a weekend vacation. Right now you've got the cart so far ahead of the horse, that the horse has given up and gone back in his stall.

SeekingTrinity -> RE: LDR Tasks (11/2/2013 3:15:03 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: EasyE quote: ORIGINAL: SeekingTrinity Dude, you are in a relationship with her. You've talked with her, you know her, she looks to you. It's YOUR relationship. You talked with her, I haven't. Do you honestly want to represent yourself as nothing more than the user of everyone else's ideas? To me, that is being misleading because the reality is Im not going to be in the bed with the both of you for however long your relationship lasts...telling you what to do...and you performing like my trained monkey. I don't know shit about her, nor anything about you. How on Earth am I going to know anything about what would work or fail on an epic level? You dig what Im saying? I agree using the term relationship at this stage is false. We haven't met yet. So I have no disillusions about that. I belive asking for ideas and brainstorming is a far cry from misrepresenting yourself and creativity. I've never done long distance, so its natural to seek ideas. I'm the one filtering them and making them my own. I don't need any help in RT. Sweetie, I honestly wasn't down on you at all for the term "relationship." Far be it from me to judge how you choose to live your life. Long distance isn't easy. I've got that going on myself. He and I live about 4 hours apart with no plans on either side to relocate. We see each other about once a month and have been doing this for almost 2 years. So Im the last person who would call anything you say about what you have as false. It's not really anything just yet. Could turn into nothing. Could turn into something great. What I was trying to point out is that you know her better than I do. I also happen to not see the whole point of online BDSM and D/s, but far be it from me to judge you on that either. It's your connection and you claimed the dominant role. So your ideas have to come from you, not from me or from anyone else. That's the point I was trying to make.

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