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Mistresses Profiles, or lack thereof. - 7/3/2006 8:15:23 AM

GhostDance

Posts: 5
Joined: 5/22/2006
Status: offline

First of all everybody, hello. Im relatively new to the community so I figured I would post on the board and get to know everybody. I just love how everybody is so open on this board.

This is a question I have been wanting to ask. I had a rather interesting message this morning from a Domme in California. I click on it, open it, and it's about two sentances, literally. Basically, hello, Im in California, Im looking for somebody in Houston. Send cock pics. Later.

Now, Im sure any other guy would just jump on that opportunity, however, I tend to show a bit more tact when it comes to xeroxing my genitelia all over the world, especially when the recieving party is in question as is.

I tried to check out the senders profile, and they literally had nothing on there. Just a name, and what they were looking for as in Sub Men, etc. No description, no interests, no picture, nothing.

Doesn't anybody find it interesting that a Domme is going to be scouting out subs, yet not even attempt to fill out the profile in its entirety? I tend to reciprocate the equal level of interest that the other party exhibits, but its a bit hard when you don't know who Im talking to.

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RE: Mistresses Profiles, or lack thereof. - 7/3/2006 8:25:18 AM

MsSonnetMarwood

Posts: 1898
Joined: 2/10/2005
From: Eastern Shore, Maryland
Status: offline

You will probably find all the discussion you need on this recent thread:

http://www.collarchat.com/m_447630/tm.htm

_____________________________

~Ms. Sonnet Marwood~

Deja Moo: The feeling you've heard this bull somewhere before.

(in reply to GhostDance)

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RE: Mistresses Profiles, or lack thereof. - 7/3/2006 8:25:24 AM

gooddogbenji

Posts: 5094
Joined: 11/15/2005
From: Toronto
Status: offline

Yes. Domme. Of course it was a real woman, not a horny old man. Why would someone even suggest that?

Yours,

benji

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Prevent global warming. Stop burning patchouli.

(in reply to GhostDance)

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RE: Mistresses Profiles, or lack thereof. - 7/3/2006 8:54:06 AM

MsKatHouston

Posts: 1909
Joined: 6/7/2006
From: Houston, TX
Status: offline

You'll find all kinds

I take someone's profile as well as their initial email to me as an indication of a lot of things and it is definitely a first impression. herefore I would think people who are looking for quality would try to portray a positive first impression.

That won't always happen though...in fact it might not happen often at all...just move on and don't sweat it.

_____________________________

-Kat

~If you can't be a good example, you'll just have to serve as a horrible warning~

(in reply to GhostDance)

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RE: Mistresses Profiles, or lack thereof. - 7/3/2006 8:54:56 AM

ShiftedJewel

Posts: 2492
Joined: 12/2/2004
Status: offline

GhostDance, there is an incredible lack of filled out profiles here on both sides of the kneel. I don't understand it either... if you are looking for something then one would think it a good idea to "sell" yourself. At least put more then "looking for a Domme" or "looking for a sub/slave" in your profile.

Yours is a very well written profile and it speaks volumns about you as a person. That's about the only kind I will reply to with any seriousness. I feel the same way about pictures, I don't like talking to someone if they don't have pics... and I mean casual pics, not magazine cutouts. It's hard enough to get to know someone online as it is let alone when the person tells you nothing about themselves.

Jewel

PS... welcome to the forums!!

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Don't ask, trust me, you won't like the answer... no one ever does.

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RE: Mistresses Profiles, or lack thereof. - 7/3/2006 9:03:43 AM

littlesarbonn

Posts: 1710
Joined: 12/3/2005
From: Stockton, California
Status: offline

For me, I figure if someone contacts me and has a profile with two sentences on it, chances are pretty good I'm going to send a generic response of "thanks" and not think anything further of it. I put a lot of work into my profile to make sure that someone reading it gets a good insight into me, and if someone can't do that on the other end, and I don't already know them or about them, then they're obviously looking for someone who is willing to jump into something without thinking about it. That's most definitely not me.

My problem has tended to be that of the few people I have contacted, I've received no response whatsoever. I've read through their profile and I'm convinced we're right for each other, and then nothing. That's why I rarely contact anyone anymore. People either have expectations that far surpass me, or they get so many responses that I'm just part of the noise rather than someone they'd like to pursue.

We've set up so many roadblocks in between each other these days that I often wonder how people actually connect anymore. I know they do because I keep reading about their successes, so I know people are doing something right. With today's atmosphere for submissive males, it seems that any ONE mistake automatically disqualifies you from any further contact, and it's so easy to make that one mistake, even if one isn't trying. It's like people put up such high standards for everyone else around them but reserve the right to be human for themselves only. And then we complain because we can't find someone compatible.

(in reply to ShiftedJewel)

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RE: Mistresses Profiles, or lack thereof. - 7/3/2006 11:39:15 AM

ShiftedJewel

Posts: 2492
Joined: 12/2/2004
Status: offline

quote:

We've set up so many roadblocks in between each other these days that I often wonder how people actually connect anymore. I know they do because I keep reading about their successes, so I know people are doing something right. With today's atmosphere for submissive males, it seems that any ONE mistake automatically disqualifies you from any further contact, and it's so easy to make that one mistake, even if one isn't trying. It's like people put up such high standards for everyone else around them but reserve the right to be human for themselves only. And then we complain because we can't find someone compatible.

Granted, there are a lot of jaded people here.. with good reason most of the time. But then again there are those of us that have set a standard that if you at least stay in touch and show up when you say you will, or call when you say you will... well... that's half the battle (you, being the generic you). I swear that's probably one of the biggest issues... it's like all of a sudden things get too real and one of the people runs for the hills. I don't get it myself, honestly, there really isn't anything to lose by showing up... except maybe a fantasy.

Sorry, didn't mean to hijack the thread.

Jewel

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Don't ask, trust me, you won't like the answer... no one ever does.

(in reply to littlesarbonn)

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RE: Mistresses Profiles, or lack thereof. - 7/3/2006 12:34:26 PM

joyinslavery

Posts: 955
Joined: 6/21/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlesarbonn

For me, I figure if someone contacts me and has a profile with two sentences on it, chances are pretty good I'm going to send a generic response of "thanks" and not think anything further of it. I put a lot of work into my profile to make sure that someone reading it gets a good insight into me, and if someone can't do that on the other end, and I don't already know them or about them, then they're obviously looking for someone who is willing to jump into something without thinking about it. That's most definitely not me.

My problem has tended to be that of the few people I have contacted, I've received no response whatsoever. I've read through their profile and I'm convinced we're right for each other, and then nothing. That's why I rarely contact anyone anymore. People either have expectations that far surpass me, or they get so many responses that I'm just part of the noise rather than someone they'd like to pursue.

We've set up so many roadblocks in between each other these days that I often wonder how people actually connect anymore. I know they do because I keep reading about their successes, so I know people are doing something right. With today's atmosphere for submissive males, it seems that any ONE mistake automatically disqualifies you from any further contact, and it's so easy to make that one mistake, even if one isn't trying. It's like people put up such high standards for everyone else around them but reserve the right to be human for themselves only. And then we complain because we can't find someone compatible.

I agree littlesarbonn. What you describe has pretty much been my experience too. I don't get contacted often but when I do it's typically a one or two liner like, "Interested in you, send a pic" or "I liked your profile, please send a pic". Then I pull up their profile and it states they will not respond and/or even block users that send one-liners (?!?!). Does make you wonder but of course a lot of it goes back to that old tired sing-song of supply and demand. Just too many of us out here so what do you do, right? I know a lot of Dommes get flooded with messages too so they have to wade through quite a few to find the ones that might be good prospects but I'd take that 'problem' any day over the desolate wasteland that is my inbox.

(in reply to littlesarbonn)

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RE: Mistresses Profiles, or lack thereof. - 7/3/2006 12:53:37 PM

Contesaluv

Posts: 173
Joined: 3/11/2006
Status: offline

GhostDance,

Life is really about choices. At any given time you can choose to answer or not answer an email sent to you in this manner, especially when it's not backed up by a thorough enough profile for you. So, you can choose to write her back or show no interest at all by not writing back. Who knows what reason she may have for not completing that profile more thoroughly. Some are still in the back of the closet. Some have stepped towards the door and others are fully out there. This may possibly be why but I'm not trying to make excuses for her but rather to state, don't sweat the small stuff. Just find what you like and what you don't like keep moving past it.

Welcome to the lifestyle! Hope you have a BALL of a good time!...lol

_____________________________

Mistress C.

It is not in the stars to hold our destiny but in ourselves.
William Shakespeare
------------------------
In a world of so many variables, why do you have to be the norm? Anonymous

(in reply to GhostDance)

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RE: Mistresses Profiles, or lack thereof. - 7/3/2006 1:27:43 PM

ZombieStitches

Posts: 10
Joined: 3/29/2006
From: Spokane, WA
Status: offline

A lot of people in general tend to not have profiles filled out...something like "Hi I like doms" or "I want to tie peoples up" *shrug*
My guess is they don't want to reveal thier identity. I like everything to be upfront myself...but I can understand why some would leave it blank... (maybee not comfortable with the whole thing yet?)
I'm surprised at how many people that message me don't read my words at all... and start off every email with "greetings mistress lets do webcam"
So maybee words don't do as much as we think. *grumble*

<3 Corpsey

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RE: Mistresses Profiles, or lack thereof. - 7/3/2006 1:54:01 PM

MistressWolfen

Posts: 578
Joined: 6/20/2005
Status: offline

I can't speak for others, but I often deactivate mine when I get sick of receiving one liners, obscene pics depicting intimate acts or closeup shots of todgers.

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RE: Mistresses Profiles, or lack thereof. - 7/3/2006 3:59:19 PM

cynthiamarie

Posts: 205
Joined: 3/11/2005
From: Bluefield, WV, USA
Status: offline

Asking for nakies of male subs in the first letter???

Um...maybe a polite recommendation that she go go ALT where about every 3rd pic in a profile is...of dangly bits.

I'm impressed when someone has read my profile and/or journal and made some comment to make me aware that they've actually done so...the letter from this person sounds like one that could have been sent out to hundreds.

I usually say that I'm not looking in my profile, to stop the form letters and "how r u? a/s/l plz" instead of deactivating mine. If we chat in the lobby or start off as friends through letters, I prefer that to declaring open season on myeslf. Unless I'm really bored and wanting to scene r/t, then I troll for bottoms.

Someone was crass enough to send me nakie pix uninvited one time in the past year and a half, so it hasn't been a problem for me.

(in reply to MistressWolfen)

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