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CM specific question - 11/18/2013 9:50:51 PM

Soulbinder

Posts: 11
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If a former dominant or submissive of yours keeps you on their favorites list, how do you feel about it if you are no longer speaking?
What might you assume their reason is for not removing you from their favorites list after things ended?

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RE: CM specific question - 11/18/2013 10:07:14 PM

peppermint

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From: Montana
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I would assume that they didn't realize I was still on the list, that they didn't know how to remove me from their list, that they didn't give a shit if I were on the list or not, or they never look at their list. Those are only my first guesses. Then I would quit checking on what my ex does or doesn't do with his/her profile and get on with my own life.

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RE: CM specific question - 11/18/2013 10:07:55 PM

directiveerror

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hmmm well i block all the ones i remember but i've had some add me (which reminded me to block them) after the fact. the ones im still semi friendly with even if i dont speak to them often i dont mind, they just like to see how my life is going(i dont have my profile connected to the forums).... the ones that i block and then they make new profiles to (i assume) see what i might say about them after i leave i just find sad... but then i find most people kinda sad so its not a big jump. i just block them whenever i come across them and dont really put much thought into it for the most part... though i have been known on occasion to out all their secrets just since i know they are watching and will think its a much bigger deal than it is(who really believes or cares about stuff that is written in cm journals)

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RE: CM specific question - 11/18/2013 10:20:39 PM

Toysinbabeland

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quote:

ORIGINAL: directiveerror

.. but then i find most people kinda sad so its not a big jump. i just block them whenever i come across them and dont really put much thought into it for the most part...

You illustrate your own point so very well

Something to consider:
Perhaps they don't really care who they "favorite" and this is simply a website and not all that important in the long run.

(in reply to directiveerror)

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RE: CM specific question - 11/18/2013 10:21:55 PM

Rochsub2009

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Personally, I never think about my favorites list. I couldn't even tell you who is on it. At the time I added them, I wanted to remember them for one reason or another. But I've long since forgotten what that reason was.

If they think their presence on my favorites llist is meaningful, they are wrong.

(in reply to Soulbinder)

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RE: CM specific question - 11/18/2013 10:22:18 PM

DarkSteven

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Why would I no longer speak with them? I try to remain on good terms with exes.

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RE: CM specific question - 11/18/2013 11:21:46 PM

SailingBum

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Hell One of my ex's is coming in from out of town...we've been ex's for prolly over 15 years. I'm having a party for her. Hate/dislike is a wasted emotion. You're only hurting yourself.

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RE: CM specific question - 11/18/2013 11:23:52 PM

stef

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Soulbinder

If a former dominant or submissive of yours keeps you on their favorites list, how do you feel about it if you are no longer speaking?
What might you assume their reason is for not removing you from their favorites list after things ended?

I wouldn't assume. I suppose if it really bothered me I would ask them to remove it, but I don't know that it would ever bother me enough to care.

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RE: CM specific question - 11/19/2013 12:03:57 AM

lizi

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The favorites list always seemed to me to be a tool used for convenience rather than something that was emotionally significant. They probably forgot you were on there and haven't checked it in a while. It wouldn't bother me if I were on their list, and I wouldn't put any special meaning on it.

(in reply to Soulbinder)

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RE: CM specific question - 11/19/2013 7:13:24 AM

lovethyself

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quote:

ORIGINAL: directiveerror
>snip<
i just block them whenever i come across them and dont really put much thought into it for the most part... though i have been known on occasion to out all their secrets just since i know they are watching and will think its a much bigger deal than it is(who really believes or cares about stuff that iswritten in cm journals)

I find it disconcerting that you feel it is acceptable to out other people's secrets. You don't know if it's a big deal for them or not.

I'm not sure what specifics you put in your journal, but blacklisting is not allowed here, and even if it was, I would hesitate to do it, because of what it says about me. If I read something like that in someone elses profile, I would not want to correspond with that person. I'd be wondering which of my secrets would get posted without my consent.

(in reply to directiveerror)

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RE: CM specific question - 11/19/2013 8:45:55 AM

thishereboi

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quote:

ORIGINAL: lovethyself

mI

quote:

ORIGINAL: directiveerror
>snip<
i just block them whenever i come across them and dont really put much thought into it for the most part... though i have been known on occasion to out all their secrets just since i know they are watching and will think its a much bigger deal than it is(who really believes or cares about stuff that iswritten in cm journals)

I find it disconcerting that you feel it is acceptable to out other people's secrets. You don't know if it's a big deal for them or not.

I'm not sure what specifics you put in your journal, but blacklisting is not allowed here, and even if it was, I would hesitate to do it, because of what it says about me. If I read something like that in someone elses profile, I would not want to correspond with that person. I'd be wondering which of my secrets would get posted without my consent.

According to his post he doesn't have a profile on the other side and if he does it comes up profile not found. He also goes on to say that "the ones that i block and then they make new profiles to (i assume) see what i might say about them after i leave i just find sad..." so I have to wonder if he is talking about a chat room somewhere and doesn't understand what the op means by adding to favorites. Now I suppose he might know someones secrets and could tell all but if I had to guess I would say he is talking out of his ass and hasn't actually met anyone offline. But he is right about one thing. No one cares what he writes in his journal except him.

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RE: CM specific question - 11/19/2013 8:48:37 AM

thishereboi

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Rochsub2009

Personally, I never think about my favorites list. I couldn't even tell you who is on it. At the time I added them, I wanted to remember them for one reason or another. But I've long since forgotten what that reason was.

If they think their presence on my favorites llist is meaningful, they are wrong.

That pretty much sums up my list also. I do have an admin on there in case I ever need to contact them but that has only happened once.

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(in reply to Rochsub2009)

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RE: CM specific question - 11/19/2013 8:50:41 AM

thishereboi

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quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

Why would I no longer speak with them? I try to remain on good terms with exes.

My ex is on cm and I don't have her profile marked on my favorites. But then again if I want to talk to her, I can just pick up the phone and call. I don't need cm for that.

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RE: CM specific question - 11/19/2013 8:54:50 AM

kalikshama

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I tried to remove myself from my ex's Friend list on Fet and don't think I ever succeeded. I don't care enough to figure this out.

(in reply to Soulbinder)

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RE: CM specific question - 11/19/2013 9:42:45 AM

Missokyst

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*FR*
I view the favorites list as a bookmark. It might be someone I find interesting or someone who might be a person I want to know. If I used it, it would be just a marker of interest, not a way to track someone. To remove someone that I had lost contact with for whatever reason would be giving it more importance than our time together. Bookmarks grow over time and fall off the radar, I would like to think I am more than a bookmark

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RE: CM specific question - 11/19/2013 4:56:19 PM

TNDommeK

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There's a favorites list? I wonder if I have anyone added to it?
I like reading the journals. They're entertaining.

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RE: CM specific question - 11/19/2013 7:35:17 PM

petitespot

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From: Surfside Beach, SC
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Soulbinder

If a former dominant or submissive of yours keeps you on their favorites list, how do you feel about it if you are no longer speaking?
What might you assume their reason is for not removing you from their favorites list after things ended?

I do it because I like to stalk him.
I'm pretty sure he likes stalking me too.

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RE: CM specific question - 11/19/2013 7:42:53 PM

NuevaVida

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Soulbinder

If a former dominant or submissive of yours keeps you on their favorites list, how do you feel about it if you are no longer speaking?
What might you assume their reason is for not removing you from their favorites list after things ended?

I don't feel anything about it. I've moved on. If he hasn't, that's his issue. I don't give any thought about his reason, because I don't care.

Maybe I was just that awesome to him.