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ResidentSadist -> RE: D/s connection, new to lifestyle (12/7/2013 7:57:16 AM)
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Well, since you aren't going to give us specifics, don't expect us to be able to give you any. How the hell can we advise you on this? You're asking what you can do to make your relationship better without telling us anything about the relationship? So, there are 101 things that come to mind off hand. Here they are from the Dominants point of view. Just reverse the idea for your situation.
101 ideas to make Your slave feel Owned (loved)
One of the main factors, for me in feeling truly Owned is to be constantly reminded throughout the day of Master's control. These reminders can be subtle or really obtrusive (heheheh). The more often a slave is reminded of her submission, the deeper it becomes....and the more fulfilling. So here are some ideas You might want to try... And no matter what rules You decide to make Your own, please....be consistent. If You are unwilling to take the time to enforce the rules You make, then there may as well be no rules at all. There is nothing in the world that will make a slave feel less loved than to have a Master/Mistress who ignores her transgressions and does not exert Their Dominance.
1. Have her wear slave bells. The constant soft jingling of the bells is soothing and a certain reminder of her submission.
2. When she has broken a rule, talk to her as You punish....and make her speak in detail about why what she did was wrong.
3. Make her take her shoes off every day as soon as she enters Your house.
4. A beautiful, special collar will make any slave joyous. Take the time to select the right one, and have her wear it as often as possible.
5. Have her call You each day at a specified time, no excuses.
6. Give her anklets and tell her she must wear one of them every day, no excuses.
7. Whenever possible (i.e. no curious young-uns about), have her kneel before You and ask to accompany You upon the furniture.
8. Choose her hairstyle and go with her to get it cut to Your specifications.
9. Whenever possible (i.e. no curious young-uns about), have her display herself whenever You come into the room.....legs spread, shirt unbuttoned. No matter what position You take, she is to be sure Your view is unobstructed
10. When around the kids or vanilla friends/family, make sure she has an alternative title for You besides Master.....such as "my Love" etc.
11. Use her sexually in a rough, selfish way when You feel like it....interrupting whatever she was doing.
12. Chose a food that she dislikes and have her eat a small portion every day for a week.
13. Have her crawl to bed each night.
14. Bring her a stuffed animal each time You go our of town. ~grin~
15. Choose her clothing each day.
16. Have her get Your daily wardrobe ready for You the night before....laid out, ironed etc.
17. After punishment, have her kiss Your boots and thank You for loving her enough to correct her.
18. Have her bring a warm towel and wash and massage Your feet each day after work.
19. Get her tattooed (Your choice of art and location).
20. Get her pierced (or preferably if You are trained, do it Yourself).
21. Get her branded.
22. Respect, but push her limits.
23. Ask her each night what she did that day that You would not have approved of. *grin* This gets her in the habit of being completely honest, and also makes her conscious of the things she could do better each day.
24. Teach her exactly how You want her to kneel, and demand perfection.
25. Reward her by allowing her to please You sexually.
26. Supervise her workout routine.
27. Each night she is to kneel next to the bed asking permission to sleep with her Master, and each night she does, she is to kneel by the bed in the morning and thank her Master for the privilege.
28. Have her polish Your boots weekly, on her knees at Your feet.
29. Negotiate until you are both comfortable with the terms and then sign a contract.
30. Giver her a writing assignment: "The definition of Pain - 1000 words"
31. Have her keep a diary of her journey into submission.
32. Instruct her that she may never get herself something to eat or drink in Your presence without first asking You if You want something.
33. Some evenings, keep her on a leash and take her with You no matter what You do....even if You do not speak to her or include her in Your activities.
34. When appropriate, she is to speak when spoken to.
35. Reward her by giving her delicious pleasure.
36. On occasion, share her.
37. When it suits You, instruct her not to make eye contact with You without Your command.
38. Have her keep her body clean shaven at all times.
39. Conduct random inspections of her body to make sure she keeps herself to Your specifications.
40. Make her wear a butt-plug under her clothes whenever she goes out alone.
41. For transgressions: have her write Your name on the bottom of her foot and tell her to remember she is walking on You with each step. (This is harder to do that You might think....)
42. Master the art of the meaningful piercing stare.....
43. Give her reading assignments.
44. Test her on the reading assignments, to make sure she learned the appropriate lessons from each.
45. Instruct her to keep her toenails painted perfectly everyday, and check to see that they are before bed
46. Make it her responsibility to put the toys away after play and punishment, and to keep them clean and neat.
47. Reward her by letting her name her favorite scene, toys, etc.
48. Call her Your slut, Your pet, etc.
49. Have her make a list of the 10 things that make her the most self-conscious, uncomfortable or embarrassed.
50. Work with her, having her do the things on the list (if possible), so that she conquers those fears and hesitations.
51. Sometimes, pamper her.....wash her body and hair, having her remain perfectly still as You turn her and move her about.
52. Hand feed her like a small child on occasion.
53. Have her eat from a dog bowl on occasion.
54. For transgressions: make her wear a sign to the next public function naming her crime. (ouch)
55. Praise her dedication when she has pleased You well.
56. Instruct her that she is never to touch Your body without permission.
57. Have her write a meditation about her submission, devotion and trust in You....to be said aloud each night before falling asleep.
58. Some days allow her no clothing whatsoever (when practical).
59. For transgressions: deny her play. No pain for you, bad girl....hehehe.
60. In the same ilk, For transgressions: deny her orgasm.....give her sex, but she can't cum.
61. For transgressions: Command that she is to be silent for a week. She may not speak, and will take whatever pain or pleasure You give as silently as possible.
62. Treat her like a pet in front of friends, making her present herself, turn herself, etc.
63. Giver her a writing assignment: "The definition of Obedience - 1000 words"
64. Have her wear a toe ring.
65. Tell her one morning that she must cum for You 15 times that day, and then write about the day.
66. Have her wear nipple clamps under her clothing out to dinner.
67. On Your birthday, let her receive Your spankings.
68. Spend time training her how to move gracefully to please You.
69. For transgressions: stand her in the corner like a 3 year old.
70. Always flog her after completion of a task, even if it was satisfactory. A well flogged slave is a happy slave.
71. Speak about her as if she were not present.
72. For transgressions: deny her any D/s at all for a week.....letting her do just as she pleases, not allowing her to serve You in any way, no punishment, no instruction, no play, banning titles of respect, etc. This will shame her and certainly make her strive to please You when it is over and she is in her place again.
73. Defend her honor to those who would disrespect Your prized possession.
74. Pet her often.
75. Make her be webMistress for Your huge site, DallasBDSM. hehehehe
76. Whenever possible (i.e. no young-uns about), have her sleep in a cage.
77. Buy her sexy or slutty clothes to Your liking.
78. Teach her things....expand her knowledge.....in a patient Fatherly way.
79. When You are away, call her and have her masturbate for You.
80. If You choose to play with others, make sure Your slave knows who is first in Your heart.....and that some things are just for her. 101 81. Remember her birthday.
82. Lead her with a loving fist in her hair.
83. Wake her each morning with an assigned task for the day.....and make sure it is done by day's end.
84. Teach her patience.
85. Videotape Your sessions and watch them together.
86. On long trips, have her wear double dildo latex underwear.
87. Hand feed her chocolate.
88. Have her place her regular wear shoes in a line by the front door. They should be in a straight line with the laces tucked inside, or the buckles buckled. Inspect them periodically.
89. Keep a list of her transgressions in a little book....let her slip for a while...thinking You are not noticing.....then one day, bring out the book and have a day of atonement.
90. Tickle her just because You can.
91. Have her be perfectly still and quiet while You bring her extreme pleasure.....when she moves or makes a sound punish her then return to the pleasure.
92. Keep her locked in her collar when You are home. You place it on her.....having her kneel. Wear the key to the lock around Your neck.
93. When possible, have her cook and serve Your dinner wearing nothing but an apron and collar.
94. Buy her a Polaroid camera and give her assignments to take pictures of herself for You in certain outfits or positions, etc.
95. Remember to kiss and caress away her tears.
96. Don't be afraid to bring her to tears, for they are Yours as well.
97. Take her and the dog to the park, both on leashes.
98. Caress her, whisper into her ear that You love her, nibble on her belly, lick her thighs and make love to her until she cries.
99. Have her fall asleep with Your cock in her mouth and tell her You expect it to be there when You awake.
100. Occasionally, fulfill her fantasy.
101. Master's word is the last word.
Addendum
102. Make sure that she is safe at all times....when with You and when You are apart (to the best of Your ability). Keep her vehicle in good working order, make sure she has emergency money and a cell phone to call for help if needed.
103. Be consistent.
104. Take the time to talk to her.....learn her fears, her dreams and fantasies. Use Your knowledge.
105. When You go out of town, forbid her to shave her sex. Shave her Yourself when You return.
106. Specify exactly how she will address You in private and in public.
107. If You are willing to correct her each time she forgets until it is a habit, have her refer to herself as "this slave" or "this girl" etc.
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