Does your doctor know what you do BDSM wise?

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Does your doctor know what you do BDSM wise? - 12/7/2013 10:01:02 AM

ChatteParfaitt

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Do you tell your doctor what you get up to?

Have you educated your doc about BDSM?

What help or advice would you give to someone wanting to tell their doc about what they do?

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RE: Does your doctor know what you do BDSM wise? - 12/7/2013 11:48:29 AM

ResidentSadist

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Yes. My doctors know that me and my slave(s) are poly and into BDSM.

Advice? Tell your doctor you live an alternative lifestyle and ask if they mind treating you. Ask if the occasional bruise, cuts or scrapes from "rough sex" bothers them. You will be surprised how many of them will confess to dabbling in BDSM or kink themselves.

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RE: Does your doctor know what you do BDSM wise? - 12/7/2013 11:52:56 AM

ChatteParfaitt

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When I told my doctor, I was concerned about what he'd think.

Then he told me about a few of his patient's 'oddities' -- and I realized I'm not that strange after all.

I've educated him about kink as well as my shrink, and now my shrink is using him for a doctor, after I recommended him.

What can I say? It's a small town.

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RE: Does your doctor know what you do BDSM wise? - 12/7/2013 12:07:26 PM

DesFIP

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I haven't but we're into bondage and sex, not s & m. So it's unlikely I'm ever going to show up covered in welts and slow healing bruises.

Should I have reason to go there with a play related injury, I would have no difficulty being factual about the cause.

However, when I was in therapy I did tell my therapist.

< Message edited by DesFIP -- 12/7/2013 12:13:02 PM >

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RE: Does your doctor know what you do BDSM wise? - 12/7/2013 12:27:15 PM

AthenaSurrenders

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No. But then I'm not having ongoing treatment for anything that makes it something they need to know. It's pretty rare I go to the doctor, and even more rare that I have any marks that might concern anyone.

Then again, with the NHS there's not really the same culture around doctors. You just get assigned to a practice, and that's where you go unless you have any problems. There would be none of this 'do you mind treating me' and certainly no interviewing to find a doctor who suits you. Perhaps it's different with private healthcare, I dunno. I've never had a relationship with my doctor beyond 'I feel sick'.

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RE: Does your doctor know what you do BDSM wise? - 12/7/2013 2:59:52 PM

angelikaJ

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I did tell my primary doctor that I engaged in impact play and might have bruises on occasion but they were consentual.
As long as they were consentual she had no issue with them.

My therapist knows, and I have had to educate her a bit about how a power exchange dynamic works.
She does not have an issue.

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RE: Does your doctor know what you do BDSM wise? - 12/7/2013 3:04:14 PM

ChatteParfaitt

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Thank you Des.

Can you elaborate on how you would go about telling the doctor at all?

I believe this is a really important thing to do, and I'll probably write an article about it.

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RE: Does your doctor know what you do BDSM wise? - 12/7/2013 3:53:27 PM

shiftyw

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No to both. A variety of personal reasons for the shrink(s) and there just hasn't been a reason to speak with a doctor about it, except when my thyroid goiter came about I guess we did ask if trauma to the thyroid could have caused it and he told us that unless he had throat punched me...it was most likely just something that developed.

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RE: Does your doctor know what you do BDSM wise? - 12/7/2013 4:03:47 PM

shadowborn61

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I am a Veteran and go to the V.A. hospital for treatment and since i started going to the V.A. i have had three different doctors and i have informed each that i live an alternative lifestyle so they know if i come in marked up (never have yet) that it is consensual.
They are really hot about Vets being abused so i want no repercussions if i happen to have an intense play scene right before seeing the Doc.

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RE: Does your doctor know what you do BDSM wise? - 12/7/2013 4:37:46 PM

DarkSteven

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I'm a Dom. No need to tell him.

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RE: Does your doctor know what you do BDSM wise? - 12/7/2013 5:01:26 PM

MistressDarkArt

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Nope, she doesn't know. I don't give or receive significant marks so there's no reason to tell her, or for my partner to his md. The only thing I do that could be a potential problem involves urethral electrodes, but I follow sterile protocol and offer prophylactic UTI prevention beforehand if there's a concern.

If there was a need, I'd tell her. I'm sure she's heard weirder stuff than mine. Hypothetically, I would probably say something like, "Dr. N, we've known each other a long time but there's something I haven't had to bring up before. When my back pain/sciatica acts up, sometimes I have my friend use a whip on my butt. It feels good to me and relieves the pain. Last night the tails wrapped in the wrong spot near my hip and you might see a pattern of bruises there. Nothing to worry about. Carry on."

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RE: Does your doctor know what you do BDSM wise? - 12/7/2013 5:50:50 PM

Moonlightmaddnes

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No, the only doctor I saw on a regular basis was my OB and when I was pregnant my husband will not play at all so no marks need explaining. Our family doctor I only see for flu's and colds.

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RE: Does your doctor know what you do BDSM wise? - 12/7/2013 5:56:23 PM

MalcolmNathaniel

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<y doctor thinks I am the Devil incarnate because I smoke. Mentioning BDSM would probably lead to her having a cardiac episode.

Come to think of it, I should probably get a new doctor.

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RE: Does your doctor know what you do BDSM wise? - 12/7/2013 6:19:02 PM

thezeppo

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No, but I regularly get bruises, bites, scratches and whatnot in my line of work anyway, I doubt my doctor would raise an eyebrow at a few more.

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RE: Does your doctor know what you do BDSM wise? - 12/7/2013 6:19:12 PM

ChatteParfaitt

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Thanks MDA, that's exactly what I was looking for.

I opened up to my md a bit at a time, he's been my doc for almost 15 years, so he has the full picture now.

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RE: Does your doctor know what you do BDSM wise? - 12/7/2013 6:42:32 PM

TNDommeK

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No, I'm with DS, no need to tell em.

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RE: Does your doctor know what you do BDSM wise? - 12/7/2013 7:00:49 PM

Onerat1

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I never told any of my doctors to earlier this year. I go to a health center so there is quit a few doctors. I told the last two I saw. I think it was in case they saw the marks. Did not tell either to much. Neither had a problem with it. Made sure I was clear that it is wanted, not abuse.

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RE: Does your doctor know what you do BDSM wise? - 12/7/2013 7:18:53 PM

DesFIP

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quote:

ORIGINAL: ChatteParfaitt

Thank you Des.

Can you elaborate on how you would go about telling the doctor at all?

I believe this is a really important thing to do, and I'll probably write an article about it.

The important thing to remember is that no matter what the doctor does in his own life, he's seen worse than anything you can tell him as an intern in a ER. They get guys with heavy metal rings around the dick that can't come off and have to cut off the skin of the penis to remove it and then sew it back on. They get guys who put a light bulb up their ass and had it break.

Me walking in and saying, "ignore the rope marks and welts. He had me tied up in high heels and I slipped and sprained my arm" is not something that any doctor is going to care about. As long as you are open and matter of fact about it, they won't think you're being abused. If you need, you could preface this by saying "We do s & m, entirely consensual. But I got hurt, please look at this and see if it needs stitches".

To the therapist, I asked her how familiar she was with alternate lifestyles, she said very. I said I was starting a d/s relationship as the sub. She said that considering the amount of stress then in my life, without me having any power to effect changes, it made a lot of sense to her that I would look for a break in having total responsibility.

I didn't discuss sex or bondage, because I had no problem with them that I needed to work out. I then went on discussing the issues that had brought me in.

And Malcolm, I'm sure your doctor would be much more upset by your smoking that your sex life.

< Message edited by DesFIP -- 12/7/2013 7:29:53 PM >

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RE: Does your doctor know what you do BDSM wise? - 12/7/2013 7:22:55 PM

MistressDarkArt

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quote:

ORIGINAL: ChatteParfaitt

Thanks MDA, that's exactly what I was looking for.

I opened up to my md a bit at a time, he's been my doc for almost 15 years, so he has the full picture now.

Glad to be of help, Chatte. Hopefully your doctor was understanding?

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RE: Does your doctor know what you do BDSM wise? - 12/7/2013 8:23:25 PM

sexyred1