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Old sayings - 12/11/2013 6:20:30 PM

Missokyst

Posts: 6041
Joined: 9/9/2006
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As I get older I find more and more that the old sayings really are true. Things like:
"A fool and his money are soon parted"
"Birds of a feather, flock together."
"You don't know what you've got until it's gone."

But every now and then one of those old sayings gets a pretty decent update.. like this one

“Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free,” here’s an update for you.
Now 80 percent of women are against marriage, why?
Because women realize it’s not worth buying an entire pig, just to get a little sausage.

Are there any old sayings you want to update?

_____________________________

pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding ~Gibran, Kahlil

“The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth suffering for.”
― Bob Marley

Post #: 1

RE: Old sayings - 12/11/2013 8:03:54 PM

MistressDarkArt

Posts: 5178
Status: offline

I heard a similar version of that:

'Why buy the entire pig when you just want 4 ounces of sausage?'

Attachment (1)

(in reply to Missokyst)

Post #: 2

RE: Old sayings - 12/11/2013 9:24:59 PM

sloguy02246

Posts: 534
Joined: 11/5/2011
Status: offline

FR

As I have grown older, what I have found totally amusing is that for almost every one of those "wise" old proverbs, there is another "wise" old proverb that states the exact opposite.

Examples:

Look before you leap. (BUT) He who hesitates is lost.

A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush. (BUT) Nothing ventured, nothing gained.

Curiosity killed the cat. (BUT) What you don't know can't hurt you.

Absence makes the heart grow fonder. (BUT) Out of sight, out of mind.

I'm sure there are a ton more that contradict each other.

(in reply to MistressDarkArt)

Post #: 3

RE: Old sayings - 12/11/2013 9:26:09 PM

tommonymous

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Joined: 1/21/2013
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"A bush on the hand is worth two birds in the bar."

EDIT: I forgot a word.

_____________________________

"Remember kids. Just because it hasn't happened to you doesn't mean it doesn't happen at all." --Hillwilliam

And just because it worked for you, doesn't mean it will (or ought to) work for everyone.

(in reply to MistressDarkArt)

Post #: 4

RE: Old sayings - 12/12/2013 2:51:56 AM

areallivehuman

Posts: 277
Joined: 1/16/2010
Status: offline

A couple more updated ones:

"A fool and his money are soon partying."

" People who live in grass houses shouldn't get stoned."

(in reply to tommonymous)

Post #: 5

RE: Old sayings - 12/12/2013 3:51:43 AM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
Status: offline

Still the best one of all time......

"You can't make chicken salad out of chicken shit."

Think about it.

_____________________________

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Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

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(in reply to areallivehuman)

Post #: 6

RE: Old sayings - 12/12/2013 6:04:31 AM

DarkSteven

Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
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I can remember when they were all new sayings.

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to LadyPact)

Post #: 7

RE: Old sayings - 12/12/2013 9:02:04 AM

LorraineCA

Posts: 114
Joined: 12/10/2013
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"Never look a gift horse in the mouth."
"Never accept gifts from strangers."

(in reply to DarkSteven)

Post #: 8

RE: Old sayings - 12/12/2013 9:04:22 AM

mnottertail

Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
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Never pee on an electric fence....

should be updated to:

Never pee on an electric fence, when it is on.

_____________________________

Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30

(in reply to LorraineCA)

Post #: 9

RE: Old sayings - 12/12/2013 3:23:21 PM

Missokyst

Posts: 6041
Joined: 9/9/2006
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Two steps forward, one step back.

...means you won't pass your sobriety test.

_____________________________

pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding ~Gibran, Kahlil

“The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth suffering for.”
― Bob Marley

(in reply to mnottertail)

Post #: 10

RE: Old sayings - 12/12/2013 7:40:41 PM

playfulotter

Posts: 2195
Joined: 6/27/2005
Status: offline

A few that I have liked through the years are:

"Don't bite the hand that feeds you."

"Beauty is only skin deep."

"A broken clock is right twice a day."

So many more.....

< Message edited by playfulotter -- 12/12/2013 7:48:04 PM >

_____________________________

We are all born ignorant, but one must work hard to remain stupid.” ― Benjamin Franklin

"Some people are otters, some people are rocks." ~Sheldon Cooper

(in reply to Missokyst)

Post #: 11

RE: Old sayings - 12/12/2013 10:12:16 PM

MistressDarkArt

Posts: 5178
Status: offline

My dad had some great old chestnuts:

1. Lie down with dogs, wake up with fleas
2. Don't sweat the small stuff (it's all small stuff)
3. Money buys convenience

I continue to strive for #2. I totally believe #1 and #3.

(in reply to playfulotter)

Post #: 12

RE: Old sayings - 12/12/2013 10:56:31 PM

BecomingV

Posts: 916
Joined: 11/11/2013
Status: offline

"A good man is hard to find."

turned into

"A hard man is good to find."

to the post-viagra

A hard man is easy to find... in about 20 minutes." (but take him to the ER if he's still hard after 4 hours)

_____________________________

Talk about loving travel!!! My BDSM journey to Switch took me to these places...
Previously known as:
sub - TwoHeartsBeatOne
Domme - Lady Q

(in reply to MistressDarkArt)

Post #: 13

RE: Old sayings - 12/13/2013 9:57:16 AM

MasterCaneman

Posts: 3842
Joined: 3/21/2013
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"Life is a like a shit sandwich. The more bread you have, the less shit you have to eat." I believe that was George Carlin.

_____________________________

Age and treachery will always overcome youth and ambition.

The supreme art of war is to subdue the enemy without fighting. ~ Sun Tzu

Goddess Wrangler

(in reply to BecomingV)

Post #: 14

RE: Old sayings - 12/13/2013 10:23:15 AM

jlf1961

Posts: 14840
Joined: 6/10/2008
From: Somewhere Texas
Status: offline

'You never worry about the bullet that has your name on it, worry about the one addressed "to whom it may concern".'

_____________________________

Boy, it sure would be nice if we had some grenades, don't you think?

You cannot control who comes into your life, but you can control which airlock you throw them out of.

Paranoid Paramilitary Gun Loving Conspiracy Theorist AND EQUAL OPPORTUNI

(in reply to MasterCaneman)

Post #: 15

RE: Old sayings - 12/13/2013 10:57:27 AM

Zonie63

Posts: 2826
Joined: 4/25/2011
From: The Old Pueblo
Status: offline

"Nobody forgets where they buried the hatchet."

(in reply to jlf1961)

Post #: 16

RE: Old sayings - 12/13/2013 4:26:16 PM

LookieNoNookie

Posts: 12216
Joined: 8/9/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Missokyst

As I get older I find more and more that the old sayings really are true. Things like:
"A fool and his money are soon parted"
"Birds of a feather, flock together."
"You don't know what you've got until it's gone."

But every now and then one of those old sayings gets a pretty decent update.. like this one

“Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free,” here’s an update for you.
Now 80 percent of women are against marriage, why?
Because women realize it’s not worth buying an entire pig, just to get a little sausage.

Are there any old sayings you want to update?

My Father once told me;

"You can lead a horse to water but....if you think you can get him to mow your lawn, your as stupid as your Mother once told me you were"

(in reply to Missokyst)

Post #: 17

RE: Old sayings - 12/13/2013 4:27:35 PM

LookieNoNookie

Posts: 12216
Joined: 8/9/2008
Status: offline

No.....wait a second....that wasn't my Father....that was my uncle in Cincinnati....my Father once told me.....

"Son, there are two kinds of women....and you'll never get either one".

(in reply to LookieNoNookie)

Post #: 18

RE: Old sayings - 12/13/2013 4:29:36 PM

LookieNoNookie

Posts: 12216
Joined: 8/9/2008
Status: offline

Wait....no....that was my Aunt from Syracuse (she always hated me)....my Father always told me.....

"Never look a gift horse in the mouth because....well....there's no such thing as a gift horse....it's a fucking horse you moron".....

(in reply to LookieNoNookie)

Post #: 19

RE: Old sayings - 12/13/2013 4:31:02 PM

LookieNoNookie

Posts: 12216
Joined: 8/9/2008
Status: offline

Gawdaammmmmit....that was my cousin from St Louis.....my FATHER always told me......

"Never count your chickens....before they rip your lips off".

Yeah....that's what my Father always told me.

(in reply to LookieNoNookie)

Post #: 20

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