RE: In your expert opinion...

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DsCouple23 -> RE: In your expert opinion... (12/24/2013 11:25:14 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: sexyred1 quote: ORIGINAL: DsCouple23 quote: ORIGINAL: crazyml Sure, as others have said I'm sure there are plenty of gals who are interested in a little sub play, butnomore than that. In this case I'm guessing she wasn't that into you. That doesn't necessarily mean she's not sub, just that she's not sub to you. This isn't a judgement of your domliness, just your compatibility with this sub Perhaps. But to be honest, she reminded me a lot of my ex-gf, prior to embracing my Dom. Very hard to control, all about herself, and just flaky and dishonest. These qualities i have noticed are more common with women who are exceptionally beautiful and know it. Which.. unfortunately she was and is. She works about 20 hrs a week if that on Cam, and makes 5 figures every month or more... imagine the power a 20 yr old feels when she is able to do that. J You seem so shocked at her behavior, yet you say she reminds you of your ex-gf prior to embracing your Dom. It sounds like an attraction to something unattainable which is challenging to you. That speaks volumes to me about you. I suspect that you decided to try being a Dom, so you would magically be able to control some young ,hot sex worker who deals with all sorts of men and is not likely to be seeking a relationship. Also, you say you rarely say please, thinking that is a dominant attribute. In fact, it shows a lack of manners. Finally, as everyone else said, you need to meet in person to decide on this type of relationship. Everything else is just fantasy without the reality. In real life i have phenomenal manners, i believe my quote was "i don't say please when it's unecessary". Which in this case it was highly unecessary. I do find myself attracted to challenges, but not the unattainable. And i don't "try to be a Dom", it's who i am. I have been this way since i can remember. I suppressed it for quite a while to fit into society. No more suppression. And yes i am aware the difference between Dominant and Domineering. Very different. There is no "magic control" over anyone IMO, the control is earned, and in your post you are disregarding a bit of history. It's interesting to me that this one interaction with one prospect, suddenly means i am this or i am that. In simple terms, she isn't/wasn't a match. In my moderately experienced opinion (knowing far more detail than anyone on here about her personal scenario), she is too wild to be controlled. I feel that a Dom will for sure have his hands full, and quite frankly my instincts told me after our failed meetup, even prior to knowing why she failed to meet me, that she was not trustworthy. I most likely could of manipulated her into a meeting after she screwed up... but it would be to no avail, because the chemistry wasn't there, and i need absolute trust. Too many red flags on her end that she couldn't be trusted. Anyhow, i'm on 3 day probation, so i'll post more after it's lifted.

DsCouple23 -> RE: In your expert opinion... (12/24/2013 11:27:42 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SeekingTrinity ~FRing it~ No offense intended, but it's fairly easy to snow a guy who is focused on bright shiny objects (or really pretty women)...much like the boy in the book "Where The Red Fern Grows" caught raccoons by putting a shiny object in a hole carved out of a fallen tree studded with nails to trap the coon's paw after it reached in to get the object. Get them thinking with the small head more than the big one...and vóila. It's a veritable winter wonderland of snow. She might be submissive, it's not guaranteed that she is YOUR submissive. Submissive doesn't mean blanket obedience to any person who thumps their chest and proclaims themselves dominant. Now before undies go spelunking in the rectal cavern system, I am in no way questioning your dominant street cred or demanding to see your über DOM card. But obedience is inspired, not demanded or taken by force. Not sure why the obsession with asking for a pic after Facetiming so much, but to each their own. Honestly any advice I give would probably fall on deaf ears anyway. The defensiveness and confrontational tone runs way too deep...based on responses so far to what people have said. Offering advice in this situation feels like it would be the equivalent of grabbing an electric fence while peeing on a wasp's nest. The wasps aren't going to listen either and are guaranteed to become highly defensive and confrontational. Wasn't looking for advice, just was looking for similar situations and how other people handled them, so as to broaden my horizons.

WorldsWorstMan -> RE: In your expert opinion... (12/25/2013 5:11:16 AM)
In the situation where they want to trade pictures, I let the woman send hers first. That way you keep the upper hand a bit longer.

OsideGirl -> RE: In your expert opinion...10 (12/25/2013 9:13:53 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyPact quote: ORIGINAL: OsideGirl Add oddly enough, they're sometimes the same topic from the same person.... http://www.collarchat.com/m_4410952/mpage_1/key_/tm.htm#4410952 Nice catch. And the speech pattern is similar to this one too: http://www.collarchat.com/fb.asp?m=4354302

sexyred1 -> RE: In your expert opinion... (12/25/2013 9:32:10 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: WorldsWorstMan In the situation where they want to trade pictures, I let the woman send hers first. That way you keep the upper hand a bit longer. And since at that point no one has met in real life, nor has any dynamic been agreed upon, assuming you have an "upper hand" is just wishful thinking and immature.

WorldsWorstMan -> RE: In your expert opinion... (12/25/2013 9:45:35 AM)
No, I dont think it is.. Its not a very big hand, but to have her show you hers before you show her yours is a classic move. Maybe you can say its slightly immature, since its something we learn in the playgrounds as kids, if we try to learn those kinds of things, but there are lots of things you pick up there that can be used later in life too.

OsideGirl -> RE: In your expert opinion... (12/25/2013 9:46:16 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: sexyred1 quote: ORIGINAL: WorldsWorstMan In the situation where they want to trade pictures, I let the woman send hers first. That way you keep the upper hand a bit longer. And since at that point no one has met in real life, nor has any dynamic been agreed upon, assuming you have an "upper hand" is just wishful thinking and immature. I would also consider it to be a game player. That's one of those posts that any prospective partners should be thankful for the "Forum Posts" button.

sexyred1 -> RE: In your expert opinion... (12/25/2013 10:11:40 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: WorldsWorstMan No, I dont think it is.. Its not a very big hand, but to have her show you hers before you show her yours is a classic move. Maybe you can say its slightly immature, since its something we learn in the playgrounds as kids, if we try to learn those kinds of things, but there are lots of things you pick up there that can be used later in life too. Classic move? This is not a game of chess, it is ostensibly a possible relationship. Games are fine for play, but anyone who behaves like this would never get anywhere with me. The fact that you find playground lessons apt in the adult world is very telling. Do you also throw sand at people who annoy you?

WorldsWorstMan -> RE: In your expert opinion... (12/25/2013 10:39:44 AM)
In some ways I think it can be a bit like a game of chess. You test and feel each other out and so on.. But this might be different for you, I dont know. It seems to me like some women like to make the rules, and the can get away with that as long as the net is the way it is. But for me, I find that I dont want to play by those rules, I want to make my own. I also know that many women will dislike it, but thats fine too. As "The Worlds Worst Man" you cant hope to be liked by all. But back to the point. I just like to say "ok, you want to see my face and for me to see yours ?, then feel free to send it". If this person sends the picture I get a little upper hand for a short while, as I now decide what to do, if I want to be a jerk and not send one back or play fair and send one back. I belive its putting a woman in a posittion men on online dateing sites are used to getting put in, like the man who started this tread. I will send a picture back and be fair all the time, unless the picture is one I have seen in porn or something like that. Maybe you can see it as a form of role-reversal. And I guess I put it up here as a tip to young men who wants to be some kind of "master" not to be so easy to get all the time. And no, I dont throw sand. We learnt that it was the wrong thing to do in my kindergarten, so there is another piece socialskill from those days I can lean on still

DsCouple23 -> RE: In your expert opinion... (12/25/2013 11:06:43 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: WorldsWorstMan In some ways I think it can be a bit like a game of chess. You test and feel each other out and so on.. But this might be different for you, I dont know. It seems to me like some women like to make the rules, and the can get away with that as long as the net is the way it is. But for me, I find that I dont want to play by those rules, I want to make my own. I also know that many women will dislike it, but thats fine too. As "The Worlds Worst Man" you cant hope to be liked by all. But back to the point. I just like to say "ok, you want to see my face and for me to see yours ?, then feel free to send it". If this person sends the picture I get a little upper hand for a short while, as I now decide what to do, if I want to be a jerk and not send one back or play fair and send one back. I belive its putting a woman in a posittion men on online dateing sites are used to getting put in, like the man who started this tread. I will send a picture back and be fair all the time, unless the picture is one I have seen in porn or something like that. Maybe you can see it as a form of role-reversal. And I guess I put it up here as a tip to young men who wants to be some kind of "master" not to be so easy to get all the time. And no, I dont throw sand. We learnt that it was the wrong thing to do in my kindergarten, so there is another piece socialskill from those days I can lean on still Good advice :)

lilcracker -> RE: In your expert opinion... (12/25/2013 11:40:27 AM)
So she never sent you a picture yet you did face to face cam....did she do this before or after the asking of the picture? If before why did you need a pic AND if after...are you saying you just let it slide that she was not submissive because she did not follow through with the pic...also this was online...many don't have that Dom/sub connection until it's real time. You said you could have met her but didn't...I've met those type too that played they wanted real time until it came to the meeting and then it was my fault they did not want to meet...I had failed to meet some expectation of some guy I met on the net.

littlewonder -> RE: In your expert opinion... (12/25/2013 6:44:22 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: WorldsWorstMan As "The Worlds Worst Man" you cant hope to be liked by all. Looks like your name fits you quite well. At least it gives a warning to all the women out there.

SeekingTrinity -> RE: In your expert opinion... (12/25/2013 7:25:32 PM)
~FRing it~ In my honest opinion...this clearly meets the standard of Worst. Advice. Ever. When one is preoccupied with maintaining some imagined upper hand, they've already lost before they even got started. Not many aside from similar manipulators and game players have time or patience for it. I'm also not convinced that little mind games is healthy either. But if that's what floats a sinking ship...for a bit, more power to you.

searching4mysir -> RE: In your expert opinion... (12/26/2013 6:15:30 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: WorldsWorstMan In the situation where they want to trade pictures, I let the woman send hers first. That way you keep the upper hand a bit longer. And, even as a slave, I would have told you to go fuck yourself. I have nothing to prove to anyone. When I was searching there was a bevy of pictures on my profile. When the men outnumber the women, we can choose to be picky and not play childish games.

Kana -> RE: In your expert opinion... (12/26/2013 7:00:20 AM)
quote: In the situation where they want to trade pictures, I let the woman send hers first. That way you keep the upper hand a bit longer. If I ever had to resort to cheap tawdry parlor tricks to retain dominance, I'd shave my head, buy a dress and a wig and become a taking it up the ass TG slaveslut out of shame. I don't do pics, but if I did I would send first and have no issues about it. Leadership comes from, well, leading. That means in faith, trust, courage, minor shit like that. I gain trust from her by extending it first. I earn respect by taking the risk straight up. And I don't play mind games with people who are already in a skittish quasi vulnerable situation. And speaking of hand, a few quotes for you: GEORGE: No everything is not going good. I'm very uncomfortable. I have no power. I mean, why should she have the upper hand. Once in my life I would like the upper hand. I have no hand-- no hand at all. She has the hand; I have no hand... GEORGE: How do I get the hand? JERRY: We all want the hand. Hand is tough to get. You gotta get the hand right from the opening."

LadyPact -> RE: In your expert opinion... (12/26/2013 7:14:04 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Kana If I ever had to resort to cheap tawdry parlor tricks to retain dominance, I'd shave my head, buy a dress and a wig and become a taking it up the ass TG slaveslut out of shame. Kana, you have a very entertaining way with words.

RedMagic1 -> RE: In your expert opinion... (12/26/2013 9:32:50 AM)
I dunno guys, the "you first" idea doesn't seem so ridiculous to me. My personal style is more judo-y maybe. I've said something like "May I send you my phone number?" and gotten her phone number in response. But some women enjoy feeling vulnerable, slightly at risk, even if they are big picture safe at the same time. (And, let's face it, a lot of people on this site, male and female, aren't looking at the big picture.) Anyway, I don't see why you're trashing the guy's technique. I'm pretty sure it could be a good move for flirting with some women, in the right context. I will say, though, WorldsWorstMan, that I never ask for pics and I receive them anyway. There's something to be said for getting a woman interested enough that she really wants to hear you compliment her body, or call her sexy, so she decides on her own to move the conversation in that direction.

OsideGirl -> RE: In your expert opinion... (12/26/2013 9:49:55 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: RedMagic1 I dunno guys, the "you first" idea doesn't seem so ridiculous to me. It's not the "you first", it's the reason for the "you first".

MariaB -> RE: In your expert opinion... (12/26/2013 2:09:43 PM)
Why is the op of this thread waiting approval? Oh hang on a minute, he just deleted his profile.

SweetAnise -> RE: In your expert opinion... (12/26/2013 3:02:24 PM)
Shame he deleted his profile.

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