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RE: Sex over 40 - 12/17/2004 8:10:40 PM

Nvernilla

Posts: 303
Joined: 10/1/2004
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There is no I can think of for people to stop having sex at 40. Perhaps many years of repressing your sexual desires makes it not work anymore...like the old if you don't use it you lose it theory. I'm 51 and still going strong I've never tried the viagra trip, I heard its really not very good for you, I'd eat the hell out of it before I'd live a life of no sex though...Mike

(in reply to sweetpleaser)

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RE: Sex over 40 - 12/18/2004 3:04:21 AM

sterlingsweet

Posts: 180
Joined: 8/10/2004
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Speaking for myself, and I am 45...The more I Mature and Explore the Better it gets!
I am not however with men, I am a Lesbian...I don't know if that makes a difference because of my experience or not? I have always been with women.

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RE: Sex over 40 - 12/18/2004 7:03:37 AM

subbiejenn

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Joined: 7/12/2004
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*Laughs* i am not 40 yet but i don't see me stopping sex! i do think your asking the wrong group of people because i think all of us here love sex :) i have yet to see the "rant" saying all subs just want to much sex! its all they think about! can't i find a sub who wants to communicate and just be together sometimes... *giggles*

Seriously--

this reminded me of a girl at work.. she is no where near 40 more like in her 20's! Anyway she was telling me the other day how she doesn't want sex anymore and i was astonished of course. She says she allows her husband about once a month to have sex with her but she just doesn't do anything ! She says she lays there and moans but not moans from excitement just unmotivated moans. *shrugs* she says she gets no sexual desires from any other men either cause my 1st question was it just because it is hubby and not someone else. i found that really strange not to want sex even when my Ex husband and i were fighting and separating i still wanted Sex even if was with him! *LOL* I did tell her she needed to seek help because i didn't think it was normal but couple other co workers standing there didn't seem that shocked about it as i did... so who knows....

Maybe i have to add this question to my list for my search of a perfect Dom for me... if there is a possibility they will become uninterested in sex after 40?

JMO
~jenn~

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RE: Sex over 40 - 12/18/2004 8:18:52 AM

peppermint379

Posts: 111
Joined: 8/18/2004
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I know exactly what you mean by your sex life being better than ever and without intercourse. I was in the same position several years ago. Husband's health did not allow for intercourse, but we discovered so many other ways of pleasing each other. Well, anyway, i thought it was great. Husband sadly didn't think having sex without intercourse was good after a time. Eventually he said it "wasn't the same" and gave it up. I suspect the depression of being chronically ill made him feel this way.

It was during this time of new exploration that i discovered how great sensuality can be. There was a new purpose to our lovemaking. It was so much slower and we seemed to become more aware of the other and what the other was feeling.

Anyway...it was 6 months that i look back fondly upon.

(in reply to proudsub)

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RE: Sex over 40 - 12/18/2004 8:28:55 AM

peppermint379

Posts: 111
Joined: 8/18/2004
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I've been through menopause and it did a very strange thing to me. I am now perpetually horny!! Well, the docs have always told me that my hormones aren't within the norm. I do have the problem of vaginal drying, but a bit of bottled lube works wonders!!!

Only problem is that nature played a dirty trick on me. Just as i was hornier than ever, husband's health deteriorated and he lost interest. Oh well, sometimes we have to play the cards we are dealt.

Sex and sensuality, IMO, are things we can enjoy all our lives if we're willing to sometimes make a few compromises. There is no reason for our sex lives ended abruptly as we get older.

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RE: Sex over 40 - 12/18/2004 6:01:53 PM

harmony3709

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Joined: 11/15/2004
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I'm 45 and my sex drive is actually the strongest it's ever been for me, although I've always had a high sex drive. I have also had a hysterectomy, so forced into menapause and other than the dryness that has been mentioned by others......I agree with peppermint and for me it actually seemed to turn up the drive, not slow it down!!

harmony

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RE: Sex over 40 - 12/18/2004 6:30:25 PM

FangsNfeet

Posts: 3758
Joined: 12/3/2004
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interesting topic. Back when I use to be a CNA in a nurseing home, we had an elderly couple who lived together in the same room. One day I was passing ice to each room and the Wife steped out asking "excuse me but my husband and I have shaky hands and I need my husbands dentures cleaned." She handed me a pair of dentures that had hair caught within the teeth.

Needless to say I'm not going to get into the whole psychological aspects of sex for the middle age and up. There are too many reasons and posibilities that sex therapist and psychiatrist have come up with.

Maybe it's this, mabye it's that, maybe someone needs to start taking the blue pill

Who knows as every couple is different as to why the sexual appitite within the relationship has changed.

Best advice, Use It or Loose it! Keep having and enjoying sex as much as possible and hopefully it'll never get boring. God I hope it never gets boring for me.