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RE: Are more women submissive the men? - 1/11/2014 8:54:17 PM   
sexyred1


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quote:

ORIGINAL: TieMeInKnottss


quote:

ORIGINAL: NiceButMeanGirl

TieMeInKnotts, that's funny you say that because I've been on POF and OKC and it seemed like the vast majority of men I met on both sites were apparently Dominant. I was really really obvious about my Dominant "tendencies" on my profiles, too, and still the men I found on there weren't at all compatible.

NBMG


Honestly? I believe it is the area I live in... This part of MD (the MD/DC/NOVA) area is very affluent and very educated..very much "politically correct". I believe that many of the men have just been conditioned to act that way. The other thing that makes it tough is it seems like dominant men around here prefer "power chicks"-equally dominant mates to rule the world with!!


no, it's not just your area. I have a subtle reference in my vanilla profile that says, a man who likes taking control and I get guys writing me saying they want a strong, domineering woman.

(in reply to TieMeInKnottss)
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RE: Are more women submissive the men? - 1/12/2014 10:48:41 AM   
Apocalypso


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Blueswordsman

The following are a few articles I looked at. Understand I am curious and looking for opinions not debate or expressing an opinion. I appreciate you taking the time to explore the topic. Blue http://www.collarchat.com/micons/m25.gif

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Female_submission A 1985 study suggests that about 30% of participants in BDSM activities are females.[1][2] A 1995 study indicates that 89% of heterosexual females who are active in BDSM expressed a preference for a submissive-recipient role in sexual bondage, suggesting also a preference for a dominant male, and 71% of heterosexual males preferred a dominant-initiator rol


I'd have to read the studies firsthand to be able to look at the methodology in detail, although I've found some basics through a bit of digging online. I'll tackle the first two studies together as they seem to be similar in their methodology.

It's important to note that the Wiki summary of the first two studies is inaccurate. They're specifically looking at female submission within the s/m subculture. That's a very different thing and you can't necessarily extrapolate a conclusion about the prevalence of female submission in general.

On methodology, the Breslow; Evans; Langley study is based on questionnaires. There were 182 replies all together, 132 males and 50 females. They got those via advertisements in two sadomasochistic magazines, plus contacting advertisers in a third sadomasochistic contact magazine.

Some obvious questions arise about which magazines they used; are these magazines targeted more at one group of s/m practioners then others, do they have a bigger readership in some geographical areas then others, how easy are they to obtain for people outside the big cities etc. The third also has the issue that it will have got replies specifically from people looking for s/m partners. That may be a very different demographic group then those who already have partners and don't feel the need to seek out more.

The Levitt; Moser; Jameson study is more specifically focused on women. 45 women from the s/m subculture took part, of which 34 were non-prostitutes. That's harder to look at the specific methodology because the summary only suggests that this sample group was "obtained", but doesn't say how. My instinct suggests this was probably more in-depth (possibly face to face) interviews, although I could be wrong on that. That's both based on the smaller sample and the fact they seem to have gone into more detail with their data. This study then compared its data with the first one to draw its conclusions. Again, there's an issue of how representative the sample group was; were they drawn from a specific geographical area or even a specific s/m club etc. It's harder to say there, because of having less information.

A definite problem with the first study and probably with the second is the issue of self-selection bias. (That's always a major issue in the social sciences). This data has been specifically gathered from those s/m practitioners willing to take part in academic research. That could skew the results quite heavily. Especially when, as shiftyw has pointed out, male submissiveness and female dominance go against societal expectations of gendered behaviour. That means there's a real danger that people in those groups are less likely to reply or participate in this kind of research.

The third study is somewhat different and recent enough (1995) to take the Internet into account. But it is specifically, and only, a study of sexual bondage. They studied 514 messages posted to a discussion group on bondage. So that has a lot of the same issues I outlined above, in terms of questions about how representative that discussion group is of the whole, self-selection bias etc. I also don't think you can validly make conclusions about submissiveness in general from that specific a study. Note that the most common reason for bondage they found was "playful use of bondage to explore new areas of sexual pleasure" which is a very different motivation then submission.

Those are the most serious studies so needed to be dealt with in more depth. People may be glad to know the rest will be a lot shorter!


quote:

http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/psyched/200805/why-do-women-have-erotic-rape-fantasies A recent analysis of 20 studies over the last 30 years indicates that between 31% and 57% of women have rape fantasies, and these fantasies are frequent or preferred in 9% to 17% of women. Considering that many people are ashamed to report rape fantasies, these stats are most likely lowball figures.


As ChatteParfaitt says, that's about rape fantasies, not submission. And fantasies are not necessarily tendencies, let alone actively promised. More women do have rape fantasies then men, that's pretty well established by research. But we can't really say anything more than that.

Apart from that, the author's "personal experience" isn't that useful for this kind of academic desires.

From my "personal experience" of women I've been involved with, at least 70% of the female population have tattoos. I'm pretty sure that isn't actually the case.

quote:

http://enslaveher.wordpress.com/2013/04/01/snsd-natural-submissive-women/


Useless as a source. No citations and has the obvious intention of selling the author's book. And, in my subjective opinion on reading some of the posts, the author is the kind of moron that gives male dominance a bad name. I kinda hope someone points him in the direction of my comment. I haven't had a blustering impotent online threat for ages.

quote:

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2131722/How-women-fantasize-sexually-submissive-Female-domination-desires-highlighted-TV-Girls.html
Newsweek reported that an analysis of 20 studies that were published in Psychology Today found that up to 57per cent of women entertain fantasies where they are forced to have sex.


Same study on rape fantasies I previously covered. And the mainstream media isn't generally great at covering the social sciences properly (although they're better at it then they are the hard sciences). The Daily Mail, a mid market tabloid, certainly isn't.

quote:

http://marriedmansexlife.com/2010/08/if-women-are-naturally-submissive-dominance-doesnt-need-to-be-forced/ If Women Are Naturally Submissive, Dominance Doesn’t Need To Be Forced

Again, unhelpful source looking to sell a book. He's at least far less obnoxious then the other one though.

To conclude, note that I'm not saying that there definitely a gender imbalance in submission. However, I don't think we currently have the data to make a conclusion either way. There's simply not enough research in the area to do so.

_____________________________

If you're going to quote from the Book of Revelation,
Don't keep calling it the "Book of Revelations",
There's no "s", it's the Book of Revelation,
As revealed to Saint John the Divine.

(in reply to Blueswordsman)
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RE: Are more women submissive the men? - 1/13/2014 1:25:33 PM   
Theservileone


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I've always felt it was about even.

(in reply to DesFIP)
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RE: Are more women submissive the men? - 1/13/2014 1:26:09 PM   
MercTech


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I would think you need to put the question into sociological context.
Or, is the question of submissive behavior in the BDSM subset of social communities.

Anthropological thought varies but tends to document differences in survival behavior between female male parts of the species. Also, the view of sexual roles varies over time. i.e. The move from having female lawyers during the Roman Republic contrasted with when Rome became a christian empire where women were forbidden from speaking in official capacity in any office.

(in reply to Apocalypso)
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RE: Are more women submissive the men? - 1/18/2014 5:45:55 PM   
cloudboy


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YES

Reason: whoever is geared for penetration tends to be submissive.


< Message edited by cloudboy -- 1/18/2014 5:50:31 PM >

(in reply to Blueswordsman)
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RE: Are more women submissive the men? - 1/18/2014 5:54:32 PM   
GoddessManko


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SO AGREED! I had this convo earlier with a sub, how I rather top than be topped :)


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The Bird of Hermes is my name, eating my wings to make me tame.

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RE: Are more women submissive the men? - 1/21/2014 4:00:45 PM   
SirJohn008


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The Male. the strong provider. being the Dominant and the Female, the caring producer of offspring, being the Submissive has been that way for 4 or 5 hundred, thousand years. By now, it is genetic, purely natural and normal.

(in reply to DesFIP)
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RE: Are more women submissive the men? - 1/21/2014 4:23:54 PM   
PeonForHer


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quote:

ORIGINAL: SirJohn008

The Male. the strong provider. being the Dominant and the Female, the caring producer of offspring, being the Submissive has been that way for 4 or 5 hundred, thousand years. By now, it is genetic, purely natural and normal.


Excellent. Thanks for the humour, John, and welcome to CM's forums.

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RE: Are more women submissive the men? - 1/21/2014 5:43:10 PM   
slavekate80


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For all the talk about societal expectations - I've always had the impression that female submission is something to be avoided, and I felt ashamed of it for a long time because I was taught that it's bad to want to submit to men and there was something wrong with me if I liked that. 50/50 was what was drilled into my head, egalitarian at all costs, but had I been dominant, it would have been more acceptable - or at least less unacceptable - than being a female sub. I'm not sure if I was just extra sensitive to those messages, the people closest to me weren't representative of the majority, or if it reflects a shift in culture.

(in reply to PeonForHer)
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RE: Are more women submissive the men? - 1/31/2014 6:50:13 PM   
Blueswordsman


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After reading all the post and thinking of my own vanilla and sub experiences. I concluded that most heterosexual women tend to be more sexually submissive then men.

I believe they are biologically built to submit during intercourse. It probably has something to do with only the strong procreate. The maternal instinct drives women to please a man inorder to obtain his assistance in razing a child..

Thought history men enslaved everyone they could. Women did what ever it took to keep their children safe. I think those were the two dominating human factors in molding society.

As humans we are all different. We feel differently. We think differently. We all individually imprinted our sexual kinks. So no one rule applies to us all.

Blue


(in reply to slavekate80)
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RE: Are more women submissive the men? - 1/31/2014 7:40:44 PM   
FieryOpal


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Blueswordsman

After reading all the post and thinking of my own vanilla and sub experiences. I concluded that most heterosexual women tend to be more sexually submissive then men.

I believe they are biologically built to submit during intercourse. It probably has something to do with only the strong procreate. The maternal instinct drives women to please a man inorder to obtain his assistance in razing a child..



This isn't a simple question to answer, but going by generalizations, I would have to agree that this is indeed the case. As a matter of fact, an inherently submissive disposition would extend to the entire human race, not those of one gender over the other. Not everyone can assume a leadership position or take on the role of leader. Most people are followers and not independent thinkers. Who steps up to intervene when humans get caught up in a groupthink mob mentality? If males did not possess a natural capacity for submission, how could they follow orders or act in a subordinate role, particularly during warfare?

As pertaining to aggression, male hormones assist males, and I don't think anyone would dispute that higher testosterone levels are linked to higher aggression. Nonetheless, one cannot necessarily polarize aggression with submission. Passivity is more often paired with being the flipside of aggression, and being submissive has little to do with being passive or with having a passive personality, in the same manner that dominance does not equate to aggressiveness, but more to assertiveness.

Re maternal instinct, this is a fiercely protective instinct. Cross a mother bear and you'll be climbing the nearest, tallest tree for safety in no time. (And you'd be SOL if she happens to be a tree-climbing bear.) Maternal instinct overrides the basic, primal instinct for self-preservation and crosses over into the no-fear zone of self-sacrifice. It is this same no-fear zone which makes for truly heroic actions. I would even go so far as to say that the greatest hero is capable of the noblest act of self-sacrifice. (Go watch the movie "Elysium," which although fictional, represents an archetypal anti-hero-turned-hero submissive male.)

Getting back to what is "natural" or what Nature has shown us, if you have ever been around a female in heat, there is nothing totally submissive about estrus (pre-penetration). Rather, it is more of a mating-ritual dance where the female displays dominance/territorialism, indifference to her suitor(s), then may or may not decide to submit to the male's advances. Male mammals are also instinctively drawn to approach the female from behind and attempt to prep her by licking her vulva. THIS is the natural order of things; you don't see females going around doing this to sexually mature males of their species.

[Edited to remove bolding & to add sentence]

< Message edited by FieryOpal -- 1/31/2014 7:53:05 PM >


_____________________________

Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage. - Lao Tzu
There is no remedy for love but to love more. - Thoreau

(in reply to Blueswordsman)
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