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San Diego Woman - 1/12/2014 10:09:11 AM   
Cronusfor2


Posts: 5
Joined: 10/3/2012
Status: offline 		Hello CM,
I have been dating/seeing a few woman here, but I met a woman, who expressed needs and desires aligning to my own strong needs and desires. We went on one date, laughing and enjoying ourselves. Conversing in both vanilla and lifestyle topics. We discovered we both share opinions of subs/slaves. Although we both have issues with the word slave, she is more slave if a title must be used and that is the woman my own journey has led me to understand about myself that I need even more than desire. Being a single mother, finding time to communicate, let alone be together is extremely difficult. So as much as we continue to say we want to develop together and she has asked to begin her training, I'm finding inner battles with my Dom that I am, while respecting the time she needs for the dual roles she has. If there are others that have experienced this, feel free to comment.

Enjoy a safe and wonderful day
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: San Diego Woman - 1/13/2014 2:18:56 PM   
Blankpain


Posts: 127
Joined: 5/20/2010
Status: offline 		I'm confused.

(in reply to Cronusfor2)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: San Diego Woman - 1/13/2014 2:26:31 PM   
Rawni


Posts: 1175
Status: offline 		What do you mean you are struggling with your dom... self... what is the issue?





(in reply to Blankpain)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: San Diego Woman - 1/13/2014 2:35:15 PM   
booklover13


Posts: 78
Joined: 3/20/2013
Status: offline 		What inner battles?

_____________________________

"Anyone who isn't confused really doesn't understand the situation."
~Edward R. Murrow

(in reply to Cronusfor2)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: San Diego Woman - 1/13/2014 2:38:26 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		If you can't put the demands of your dick aside so that she can support her kids, then you need to grow up.

Yeah, you want someone available to run over and suck you nightly, ain't going to happen.

This is why I strongly recommend that single mothers date single fathers who are actively involved with their own kids. You don't get this.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to booklover13)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: San Diego Woman - 1/13/2014 2:58:33 PM   
Iknowyoursecrets


Posts: 6
Joined: 11/13/2012
Status: offline 		Ok, I get it.

Been there myself. As Im sure you know, setting aside time that is going to be 100% interruption free is almost impossible with a single mom. There is no one else to pick up the slack, no on else to make sure that the little person/teen age monster eats, is safe etc.

That being said she is going to feel really bad and hyper sensitive about the issue as well. Perhaps using "Real Life" as a quick safe word or text is helpful. For me it worked. The fact that she took a few seconds to text RL when she couldn't meet for our date is enough. I get that kid issues are going to switch the most wonderful slave into attack mode if you step in the way.

Im sure you can create a safe environment where she feels that she is able to meet both her roles. Frankly, its YOUR job as a dom to do so. (which you most likely do...seeing as you posted ). Focus on the intensity of the time not the amount of the time.

Before I go on about stuff I have done... Perhaps you could share some of the things you are thinking about doing to help her feel secure in her service?

That way Im not being an asshat giving you obvious advice and you also will get the benefit of the single moms here.

As you can see its a sensitive issue to them as well. I will check back... I am always interested in picking up good tips.

Best,

Michael

(in reply to DesFIP)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: San Diego Woman - 1/13/2014 4:07:48 PM   
onenaughtyplease


Posts: 3
Joined: 5/16/2013
Status: offline 		Do I understand correctly, they are having difficulty finding time to both speak and be together?

< Message edited by onenaughtyplease -- 1/13/2014 4:09:37 PM >

(in reply to Iknowyoursecrets)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: San Diego Woman - 1/13/2014 4:13:36 PM   
Rawni


Posts: 1175
Status: offline 		I was a single mother of more than that. I worked, I played and I was a good parent cooking everything from scratch and you wouldn't find a dirty spot on floors or walls. I still managed to have an adult life. I talked on the phone while they were awake playing or doing homework that I wasn't needed for and after they went to bed.

Pay for a quality sitter once or twice a month.

Find a friend to exchange times of sitting for the kids.

You have already included the kids... so they know about you which allows for a bit more freedom.

There is no reason other than severe handicap of a child that warrants no life for an adult.

(in reply to onenaughtyplease)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: San Diego Woman - 1/13/2014 4:15:17 PM   
Rawni


Posts: 1175
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: onenaughtyplease

Do I understand correctly, they are having difficulty finding time to both speak and be together?


LOL It was one thing to post as the op from another profile... completely another, when you try to act like you are someone else commenting, by deleting your message.

(in reply to onenaughtyplease)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: San Diego Woman - 1/13/2014 4:35:31 PM   
Cronusfor2


Posts: 5
Joined: 10/3/2012
Status: offline 		Iknowyoursecrets, onenaughtyplease & Rawni,
Yes, you all got it. She is filling two roles, has two jobs and we are having a hard time even speaking on the phone without 'ears' being able to listen, let alone find 100% interruption time. Don't get me wrong. Both children are wonderful. We went to dinner at a local restaurant, carried on conversations together, laughed and enjoyed ourselves. Her son performed and amazing magic trick sitting right next to me, that I have no idea how he made the quarter disappear. To save her time, I've been driving to her work at the restaurant, where we talk after she gets off.

Thank you all

(in reply to Rawni)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: San Diego Woman - 1/13/2014 4:35:42 PM   
kalikshama


Posts: 14805
Joined: 8/8/2010
Status: offline
quote:

Being a single mother, finding time to communicate, let alone be together is extremely difficult.


My first thought was to suggest you pay for her babysitter but I would also like to know how many kids she has and their approximate ages.

(in reply to Cronusfor2)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: San Diego Woman - 1/13/2014 4:40:06 PM   
LookieNoNookie


Posts: 12216
Joined: 8/9/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Cronusfor2

Hello CM,
I have been dating/seeing a few woman here, but I met a woman, who expressed needs and desires aligning to my own strong needs and desires. We went on one date, laughing and enjoying ourselves. Conversing in both vanilla and lifestyle topics. We discovered we both share opinions of subs/slaves. Although we both have issues with the word slave, she is more slave if a title must be used and that is the woman my own journey has led me to understand about myself that I need even more than desire. Being a single mother, finding time to communicate, let alone be together is extremely difficult. So as much as we continue to say we want to develop together and she has asked to begin her training, I'm finding inner battles with my Dom that I am, while respecting the time she needs for the dual roles she has. If there are others that have experienced this, feel free to comment.

Enjoy a safe and wonderful day


I presume you had a question?

(in reply to Cronusfor2)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: San Diego Woman - 1/13/2014 4:45:06 PM   
Spiritedsub2


Posts: 3316
Joined: 7/18/2012
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LookieNoNookie


quote:

ORIGINAL: Cronusfor2

Hello CM,
I have been dating/seeing a few woman here, but I met a woman, who expressed needs and desires aligning to my own strong needs and desires. We went on one date, laughing and enjoying ourselves. Conversing in both vanilla and lifestyle topics. We discovered we both share opinions of subs/slaves. Although we both have issues with the word slave, she is more slave if a title must be used and that is the woman my own journey has led me to understand about myself that I need even more than desire. Being a single mother, finding time to communicate, let alone be together is extremely difficult. So as much as we continue to say we want to develop together and she has asked to begin her training, I'm finding inner battles with my Dom that I am, while respecting the time she needs for the dual roles she has. If there are others that have experienced this, feel free to comment.

Enjoy a safe and wonderful day


I presume you had a question?

So presumptuous!

_____________________________

Don’t grieve. Anything you lose comes round in another form.
~ Rumi

Laughing Dolphin

(in reply to LookieNoNookie)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: San Diego Woman - 1/13/2014 5:29:40 PM   
LookieNoNookie


Posts: 12216
Joined: 8/9/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Spiritedsub2


quote:

ORIGINAL: LookieNoNookie


quote:

ORIGINAL: Cronusfor2

Hello CM,
I have been dating/seeing a few woman here, but I met a woman, who expressed needs and desires aligning to my own strong needs and desires. We went on one date, laughing and enjoying ourselves. Conversing in both vanilla and lifestyle topics. We discovered we both share opinions of subs/slaves. Although we both have issues with the word slave, she is more slave if a title must be used and that is the woman my own journey has led me to understand about myself that I need even more than desire. Being a single mother, finding time to communicate, let alone be together is extremely difficult. So as much as we continue to say we want to develop together and she has asked to begin her training, I'm finding inner battles with my Dom that I am, while respecting the time she needs for the dual roles she has. If there are others that have experienced this, feel free to comment.

Enjoy a safe and wonderful day


I presume you had a question?


It's been said previously.

(in reply to Spiritedsub2)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: San Diego Woman - 1/15/2014 5:37:37 PM   
LookieNoNookie


Posts: 12216
Joined: 8/9/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Cronusfor2

Hello CM,
I have been dating/seeing a few woman here, but I met a woman, who expressed needs and desires aligning to my own strong needs and desires. We went on one date, laughing and enjoying ourselves. Conversing in both vanilla and lifestyle topics. We discovered we both share opinions of subs/slaves. Although we both have issues with the word slave, she is more slave if a title must be used and that is the woman my own journey has led me to understand about myself that I need even more than desire. Being a single mother, finding time to communicate, let alone be together is extremely difficult. So as much as we continue to say we want to develop together and she has asked to begin her training, I'm finding inner battles with my Dom that I am, while respecting the time she needs for the dual roles she has. If there are others that have experienced this, feel free to comment.

Enjoy a safe and wonderful day



Here's what I read:

"I have been dating/seeing a few woman here, but I met a woman........."

Which means there's a conflict between the woman you were dating and....this other person.

(Did I miss something?)

(in reply to Cronusfor2)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: San Diego Woman - 2/9/2014 2:59:55 PM   
onenaughtyplease


Posts: 3
Joined: 5/16/2013
Status: offline 		I know how difficult it is. My own life was very similar. But if didn’t have adult time, I fried. Even if they were short times of of adult time, I needed it. You are new to one another and she is uncomfortable with your paying anything. I get that too, as I am this way myself. However, if the children’s daddy isn't around and she is working two jobs, she has to make some choices. I worked 12-20 hour days at times and still found time for an hour away, drinking tea with someone or a day when I could get half a day. I always had time for shorter phone calls and sometimes longer ones. I worked seven days a week and still found time to balance my life. It wasn't easy, but it can be done. When I did meet the man that guided me, I had to be more open, listen and communicate. It took me time, but I worked through it. Something has to break... before she does and if she trusts you enough to have met the kids and start whatever training... then she will have to find her own way to make sure you stay in her and their life. It was not easy... and it was hell at times... but there is a way if she chooses it.
 Good luck.

(in reply to LookieNoNookie)
Profile   Post #: 16
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