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Online subs - 2/9/2014 7:56:04 AM

LADYTA

Posts: 1
Joined: 6/6/2012
Status: offline

I have been in the life and on this site for a few years now and I have always been asked if I would accept an online sub/slave. I have always wanted a real life situation but I am in a wonderful relationship now, some what vanilla, but I do still enjoy the total control that being a Domme gives me. What I want to know is how do I have an online sub? Where can I obtain information on how to do this so that I can have that additional control I seek? Not being able to actually inflict that pain and be there to receive the benefits of having that sub work for me, how can have that feeling I seek with an online sub?

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RE: Online subs - 2/9/2014 8:17:59 AM

Blueswordsman

Posts: 173
Joined: 10/3/2011
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I enjoy turning vanilla ladies. It takes time but the seduction gives you an unmatchable erotic shower of power. If you like your vanilla mate and D/s....seduce her. Start with a strip teas and a sexy hair pull. If she dosen't like doing something, Tell her how much you love it. Win her to you will.

(in reply to LADYTA)

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RE: Online subs - 2/9/2014 8:24:42 AM

windchymes

Posts: 9410
Joined: 4/18/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LADYTA

Not being able to actually inflict that pain and be there to receive the benefits of having that sub work for me, how can have that feeling I seek with an online sub?

I don't see how you can, not completely. If you both are prolific writers, able to describe your scenarios, your activities and reactions and emotions, you can get some sense of momentary satisfaction or thrills or extreme turn-on, which can be great at the time. Even for the long term if that fulfills you. But I'm going to dare to speak for many when I say that nothing is really as good as the real thing, and the online thing can wear very thin after awhile. But that's no reason not to give it a try.

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RE: Online subs - 2/9/2014 12:07:39 PM

littlewonder

Posts: 15659
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What does your current real life guy feel about it? You may want to talk to him first if you haven't already.

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RE: Online subs - 2/9/2014 12:57:22 PM

smileforme50

Posts: 1623
Joined: 1/24/2013
From: DelaWHERE(?)
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: windchymes

quote:

ORIGINAL: LADYTA

Not being able to actually inflict that pain and be there to receive the benefits of having that sub work for me, how can have that feeling I seek with an online sub?

I don't see how you can, not completely. If you both are prolific writers, able to describe your scenarios, your activities and reactions and emotions, you can get some sense of momentary satisfaction or thrills or extreme turn-on, which can be great at the time. Even for the long term if that fulfills you. But I'm going to dare to speak for many when I say that nothing is really as good as the real thing, and the online thing can wear very thin after awhile. But that's no reason not to give it a try.

Personally I agree....the thought of being an "online sub" really does nothing for me. Although I have heard that some folks have fun with it when they have Skype or a webcam. To each his own.....

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RE: Online subs - 2/9/2014 3:59:25 PM

JeffBC

Posts: 5799
Joined: 2/12/2012
From: Canada
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LADYTA
but I do still enjoy the total control that being a Domme gives me. Not being able to actually inflict that pain and be there to receive the benefits of having that sub work for me, how can have that feeling I seek with an online sub?

So I gather from this there is some sort of "total control" that you wish along with the infliction of pain. I don't readily see how you can do the sadism/masochism part remotely with any real satisfaction. On the control part though, I don't understand why distance has anything to do with that. For me, it's always "respect" and "sanity" which limit the control I can wield not distance.

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I'm a lover of "what is", not because I'm a spiritual person, but because it hurts when I argue with reality. -- Bryon Katie
"You're humbly arrogant" -- sunshinemiss
officially a member of the K Crowd

(in reply to LADYTA)

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RE: Online subs - 2/10/2014 8:23:46 PM

NiceButMeanGirl

Posts: 2756
Joined: 11/4/2011
From: Bellingham, WA U.S.A.
Status: offline

I can't see Dominating someone online, it just leaves me cold. I tried that before and, honestly, everything that's done to him he is really doing to himself. And, the second the computer/webcam is turned off, I have zero control. There is no real "control."

NBMG

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RE: Online subs - 2/10/2014 8:32:04 PM

SorceressJ

Posts: 2968
Joined: 7/24/2010
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quote:

ORIGINAL: NiceButMeanGirl

I can't see Dominating someone online, it just leaves me cold. I tried that before and, honestly, everything that's done to him he is really doing to himself. And, the second the computer/webcam is turned off, I have zero control. There is no real "control."

NBMG

This. Exactly.

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(in reply to NiceButMeanGirl)

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RE: Online subs - 2/10/2014 8:50:02 PM

GoddessManko

Posts: 2257
Joined: 3/6/2013
From: Dante's Inferno
Status: offline

When I don't have a collared sub or have a way to hmmm...unwind? I like playing with online subs, absolutely. And thankfully because of the influx of findommes, they are more than happy to flood in my direction in hoards, get on cam for me (free of charge) and let me direct them. One time I started a chat and I was literally directing about 5/6 subs at once while 15 others watched. (I am never on cam myself).
This is definitely not typical for me, it EXCITES me very much but it does leave one wanting more (speaking personally). Real time is just SO, SO much better but it's a nice alternative between that if not in a D/s relationship and in need of an outlet.
In R/T usually I only give my attention to one sub at a time. I can't imagine tearing myself away from his winces and grimaces to give attention to more than maybe 2 other play partners, if that. (Typically I prefer only one for polyplay, that is nough to make the possibilities endless).
So obviously if I am training that many at once I REALLY need a fix, LOL. The benefit was mutual enjoyment. I have seen some boys do impressive things on cam, better than most bdsm videos I have seen, haha. I tell them what to do, they obey, typically. I especially if they're virgins, virgins are nice...so eager. All it really takes is a fella with two working hands, a pair of shoelaces, and hopefully he has some more interesting things at his disposal. :)

quote:

ORIGINAL: SorceressJ

quote:

ORIGINAL: NiceButMeanGirl

I can't see Dominating someone online, it just leaves me cold. I tried that before and, honestly, everything that's done to him he is really doing to himself. And, the second the computer/webcam is turned off, I have zero control. There is no real "control."

NBMG

This. Exactly.

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