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[Poll]

Poll about BDSM activity requiring hospitalization


Yes, BDSM activity has landed me in the hospital
  3% (4)
Yes, BDSM activity has landed my partner in the hospital
  3% (4)
No, BDSM activity has never landed me in the hospital
  52% (58)
No, BDSM activity has never landed my partner in the hospital
  40% (45)


Total Votes : 111
(last vote on : 3/28/2014 1:14:14 PM)
(Poll will run till: -- )
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RE: Poll about BDSM activity requiring hospitalization - 3/20/2014 4:56:08 AM   
LadyConstanze


Posts: 9722
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline 		While I was pro-domming, another domme who was on the same shift called me in because a guy wanted a catheter, something I simply wouldn't do after 7 PM (simple reason is they then usually go to bed, instead of drinking lots and peeing enough to help a potential infection being washed out) and said it looked really weird, she's worried. So we quizzed him a bit, turned out he used a pencil as sounds, thought it was the right size and material doesn't matter... As a result he had a horrible infection of the urinal tract (he thought he would get praise for telling us that he washed the pencil before, thought disinfecting it with alcohol would make it sting too much), then was embarrassed to go and see a doc and only went when he kept leaking puss all the time and the pain was too bad...

He couldn't understand that I kept on telling him he should forget all about catheters, sounds, anything that gets inserted into his urethra as his urethra is most likely so full of scars that it will always result in infections and injuries and he's going to piss blood and that's the most harmless thing that will happen. He didn't get it and was seriously pissed off being told that anything invasive and his penis is a NO GO. If he wants to be self-destructive, cool, just don't bring others into it and use them as a tool for your self-destruction.

That's the kind of stuff where you do wonder how somebody reached adulthood with so few brain cells, or where you doubt "survival of the fittest"

_____________________________

There are 10 kinds of people who understand binary
Those who do and those who don't!

http://exdomme.blogspot.com/2012/07/public-service-announcement.html

(in reply to AthenaSurrenders)
Profile   Post #: 41
RE: Poll about BDSM activity requiring hospitalization - 3/20/2014 5:08:25 AM   
AthenaSurrenders


Posts: 3582
Joined: 3/15/2012
Status: offline 		I wish I hadn't asked. I'm going to be seeing the pussy penis in my nightmares tonight.

_____________________________

Being your slave, what should I do but tend
Upon the hours and times of your desire?

(in reply to LadyConstanze)
Profile   Post #: 42
RE: Poll about BDSM activity requiring hospitalization - 3/20/2014 5:16:00 AM   
LadyConstanze


Posts: 9722
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline 		To be honest, I don't think that guy will ever have sex with anybody unless it's a pitch black night, I just can't understand how a fetish can take over so much that you are willing do something that will result in something pretty horrendous.

Trust me, I did feel a bit nauseous after seeing his member. I had to bite my tongue to not make a snarly comment along the lines of "You don't have much there, you want to keep the bit you have!"

_____________________________

There are 10 kinds of people who understand binary
Those who do and those who don't!

http://exdomme.blogspot.com/2012/07/public-service-announcement.html

(in reply to AthenaSurrenders)
Profile   Post #: 43
RE: Poll about BDSM activity requiring hospitalization - 3/20/2014 5:34:27 AM   
MisterP61


Posts: 1345
Joined: 10/9/2007
Status: offline 		That might have made his day. Most who are into BDSM and have little pee pees are into humiliation too sooooo....

_____________________________

Proudly married to the "Diva of Destruction" LadyPact
Though the truth may vary, this ship will carry our bodies safe to shore - Of Monsters and Men
What is the maximum effective range of an excuse? Zero meters!

(in reply to LadyConstanze)
Profile   Post #: 44
RE: Poll about BDSM activity requiring hospitalization - 3/20/2014 5:43:56 AM   
LadyConstanze


Posts: 9722
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MisterP61

That might have made his day. Most who are into BDSM and have little pee pees are into humiliation too sooooo....



Please tell LadyP that I just had an epiphany regarding Mr Moobs, thanks to your posting.... Now we know...

_____________________________

There are 10 kinds of people who understand binary
Those who do and those who don't!

http://exdomme.blogspot.com/2012/07/public-service-announcement.html

(in reply to MisterP61)
Profile   Post #: 45
RE: Poll about BDSM activity requiring hospitalization - 3/20/2014 5:50:44 AM   
MisterP61


Posts: 1345
Joined: 10/9/2007
Status: offline 		HOLY CHIT!!!! I like your "epiphanies" hehe. Seriously I never thought of that <insert face palm gif here>.

_____________________________

Proudly married to the "Diva of Destruction" LadyPact
Though the truth may vary, this ship will carry our bodies safe to shore - Of Monsters and Men
What is the maximum effective range of an excuse? Zero meters!

(in reply to LadyConstanze)
Profile   Post #: 46
RE: Poll about BDSM activity requiring hospitalization - 3/20/2014 7:18:06 AM   
Lynnxz


Posts: 4813
Joined: 10/3/2006
From: Atlanta
Status: offline
quote:

but I've seen a lot more subs or bottoms breach the consensual rule than tops, simply by not disclosing medical issues or phobias, it's one of the reasons why I don't do much casual play anymore


Like the guy who INSISTS he is in top health, but you spot that ten inch cardiac scar on his chest, and a pacemaker lump to boot.

_____________________________

HBIC



(in reply to AthenaSurrenders)
Profile   Post #: 47
RE: Poll about BDSM activity requiring hospitalization - 3/20/2014 7:31:16 AM   
GoddessManko


Posts: 2257
Joined: 3/6/2013
From: Dante's Inferno
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Lynnxz

quote:

but I've seen a lot more subs or bottoms breach the consensual rule than tops, simply by not disclosing medical issues or phobias, it's one of the reasons why I don't do much casual play anymore


Like the guy who INSISTS he is in top health, but you spot that ten inch cardiac scar on his chest, and a pacemaker lump to boot.


Honestly it did get a little scary for me like this once when a much older man wanted to sub for me with the footnote that I have to be careful or I might make him bleed badly. That pretty much terrified me. In my mind I was thinking "elderly abuse!"
I just refuse to play with someone of delicate disposition because of that. When I'm in my Dom mode, I'm not exactly the same person.

I really liked this one sub in particular, smart (really smart) and good looking guy but the fact that he had some sort of rare disorder made me withdraw reluctantly. I just don't want to legitimately hurt anyone to the point that there would be questions in the emergency room I wouldn't want to answer.
A tattoo, piercing, eh...those are OK. Anything that will cause an ambulance to pull up, NOT OK.
I think knowing the overall health of your partner is important in deciding whether or not to proceed.

PS: And holy hell, LadyC, did he survive??? LOL, a lot of people are unaware of the lethal nature of infections. Once you have a fever WITH an infection, it means you're possibly going to die. It's pretty serious. That guy was just...all I can so is shake my head.

< Message edited by GoddessManko -- 3/20/2014 7:37:44 AM >

_____________________________

Happy consent is the name of the game. You are my perfect Mistress. - my collared.

http://submissivemale.blogspot.com/

The Bird of Hermes is my name, eating my wings to make me tame.

(in reply to Lynnxz)
Profile   Post #: 48
RE: Poll about BDSM activity requiring hospitalization - 3/20/2014 7:36:21 AM   
MisterP61


Posts: 1345
Joined: 10/9/2007
Status: offline 		Like GodessManko just said. There are times when the Dominant has to say "sorry, no"

BTW I am still waiting for My motor boat... I am a military Man after all

_____________________________

Proudly married to the "Diva of Destruction" LadyPact
Though the truth may vary, this ship will carry our bodies safe to shore - Of Monsters and Men
What is the maximum effective range of an excuse? Zero meters!

(in reply to GoddessManko)
Profile   Post #: 49
RE: Poll about BDSM activity requiring hospitalization - 3/20/2014 7:38:31 AM   
LadyConstanze


Posts: 9722
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Lynnxz

quote:

but I've seen a lot more subs or bottoms breach the consensual rule than tops, simply by not disclosing medical issues or phobias, it's one of the reasons why I don't do much casual play anymore


Like the guy who INSISTS he is in top health, but you spot that ten inch cardiac scar on his chest, and a pacemaker lump to boot.


Encountered one of them as a pro as well, wanted electrical play and poppers and insisted on wearing a shirt with zippers over the nipples that he wanted to leave on, something felt freaking weird, just an odd vibe I got (and I never liked using poppers, gives me a bummer headache and if you need a substance to endure something, it's a pretty good sign that your body isn't ready to endure it) and insisted that he takes off the shirt. We didn't session and I was on the phone telling every dungeon in town to watch out....

_____________________________

There are 10 kinds of people who understand binary
Those who do and those who don't!

http://exdomme.blogspot.com/2012/07/public-service-announcement.html

(in reply to Lynnxz)
Profile   Post #: 50
RE: Poll about BDSM activity requiring hospitalization - 3/20/2014 7:39:11 AM   
GoddessManko


Posts: 2257
Joined: 3/6/2013
From: Dante's Inferno
Status: offline 		LOL MrP! With the Mrs's consent, surely!
Howdy do! *waves to the hubby of the Diva of Destruction*

_____________________________

Happy consent is the name of the game. You are my perfect Mistress. - my collared.

http://submissivemale.blogspot.com/

The Bird of Hermes is my name, eating my wings to make me tame.

(in reply to MisterP61)
Profile   Post #: 51
RE: Poll about BDSM activity requiring hospitalization - 3/20/2014 7:41:31 AM   
MisterP61


Posts: 1345
Joined: 10/9/2007
Status: offline 		Pretty sure I can get the consent thing wrapped up pretty quickly... As a matter of national security and all

_____________________________

Proudly married to the "Diva of Destruction" LadyPact
Though the truth may vary, this ship will carry our bodies safe to shore - Of Monsters and Men
What is the maximum effective range of an excuse? Zero meters!

(in reply to GoddessManko)
Profile   Post #: 52
RE: Poll about BDSM activity requiring hospitalization - 3/20/2014 7:57:07 AM   
Lynnxz


Posts: 4813
Joined: 10/3/2006
From: Atlanta
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze


quote:

ORIGINAL: Lynnxz

quote:

but I've seen a lot more subs or bottoms breach the consensual rule than tops, simply by not disclosing medical issues or phobias, it's one of the reasons why I don't do much casual play anymore


Like the guy who INSISTS he is in top health, but you spot that ten inch cardiac scar on his chest, and a pacemaker lump to boot.


Encountered one of them as a pro as well, wanted electrical play and poppers and insisted on wearing a shirt with zippers over the nipples that he wanted to leave on, something felt freaking weird, just an odd vibe I got (and I never liked using poppers, gives me a bummer headache and if you need a substance to endure something, it's a pretty good sign that your body isn't ready to endure it) and insisted that he takes off the shirt. We didn't session and I was on the phone telling every dungeon in town to watch out....


Some people are just irreparably stupid.


_____________________________

HBIC



(in reply to LadyConstanze)
Profile   Post #: 53
RE: Poll about BDSM activity requiring hospitalization - 3/20/2014 8:13:09 AM   
MisterP61


Posts: 1345
Joined: 10/9/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Lynnxz


quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze


quote:

ORIGINAL: Lynnxz

quote:

but I've seen a lot more subs or bottoms breach the consensual rule than tops, simply by not disclosing medical issues or phobias, it's one of the reasons why I don't do much casual play anymore


Like the guy who INSISTS he is in top health, but you spot that ten inch cardiac scar on his chest, and a pacemaker lump to boot.


Encountered one of them as a pro as well, wanted electrical play and poppers and insisted on wearing a shirt with zippers over the nipples that he wanted to leave on, something felt freaking weird, just an odd vibe I got (and I never liked using poppers, gives me a bummer headache and if you need a substance to endure something, it's a pretty good sign that your body isn't ready to endure it) and insisted that he takes off the shirt. We didn't session and I was on the phone telling every dungeon in town to watch out....


Some people are just irreparably stupid.


And frustratingly enough, sometimes you can't even tell them because they get selective hearing.

_____________________________

Proudly married to the "Diva of Destruction" LadyPact
Though the truth may vary, this ship will carry our bodies safe to shore - Of Monsters and Men
What is the maximum effective range of an excuse? Zero meters!

(in reply to Lynnxz)
Profile   Post #: 54
RE: Poll about BDSM activity requiring hospitalization - 3/20/2014 8:26:53 AM   
LadyConstanze


Posts: 9722
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline 		Or they tell you that the risk is theirs to take, their life, blah blah.... Great, but the D will bear the legal consequences...

_____________________________

There are 10 kinds of people who understand binary
Those who do and those who don't!

http://exdomme.blogspot.com/2012/07/public-service-announcement.html

(in reply to MisterP61)
Profile   Post #: 55
RE: Poll about BDSM activity requiring hospitalization - 3/20/2014 8:38:50 AM   
JeffBC


Posts: 5799
Joined: 2/12/2012
From: Canada
Status: offline 		~fast reply~

To the poster that spawned this poll... a bit of information here. Some of the posters on CM are HIGHLY active in the community. Some of them are or have been professional dommes. In other words, these people have seen a LOT of people and a LOT of shit happen over the years so if we start talking about 3rd party incidents well... that's going to make things look pretty horrid unless they also talk about all the bajillion 3rd party incidents where person A spanked person B and nothing interesting happened.

< Message edited by JeffBC -- 3/20/2014 8:39:26 AM >

_____________________________

I'm a lover of "what is", not because I'm a spiritual person, but because it hurts when I argue with reality. -- Bryon Katie
"You're humbly arrogant" -- sunshinemiss
officially a member of the K Crowd

(in reply to LadyConstanze)
Profile   Post #: 56
RE: Poll about BDSM activity requiring hospitalization - 3/20/2014 8:48:25 AM   
LadyConstanze


Posts: 9722
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline 		Jeff, in general, there are some pretty effed up D-types out there but then it does take 2 to tango and as an s-type, you a weird vibe or for any reason don't feel OK, just man or woman up, it's not solo game and it takes at least 2 people who are each equally responsible. I understand sub frenzy, but it's not an excuse to leave your brain behind.

Most of the stuff that was horrible were self-inflicted injuries or subs who tried to hide important health information and concerns. Just use a bit of common sense, don't rely on the D type to find all the info, if your hide is on the line, you got to take that stuff seriously. Sure, something can always happen, but then that's life.

_____________________________

There are 10 kinds of people who understand binary
Those who do and those who don't!

http://exdomme.blogspot.com/2012/07/public-service-announcement.html

(in reply to JeffBC)
Profile   Post #: 57
RE: Poll about BDSM activity requiring hospitalization - 3/20/2014 8:57:39 AM   
JeffBC


Posts: 5799
Joined: 2/12/2012
From: Canada
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze
Jeff, in general, there are some pretty effed up D-types out there but then it does take 2 to tango and as an s-type, you a weird vibe or for any reason don't feel OK, just man or woman up, it's not solo game and it takes at least 2 people who are each equally responsible. I understand sub frenzy, but it's not an excuse to leave your brain behind.

*chuckles* I think there's some pretty effed up humans out there... of all stripes. I just worried that if this thread drifted into "war stories" well... there was gonna be a lot of those. Then we get the evening news effect where all you see is the horrible crap that happens and you don't see the massive amount of boring stuff that occurs.

It's not my assessment that BDSM is particularly dangerous... even among edge players. From what I can tell I routinely hurt myself more on my roller blades (I have some sort of genetic defect where if I'm on roller blades and I see some sort of obstruction less than about waist high the immediate thought is, 'I bet I can jump that').


_____________________________

I'm a lover of "what is", not because I'm a spiritual person, but because it hurts when I argue with reality. -- Bryon Katie
"You're humbly arrogant" -- sunshinemiss
officially a member of the K Crowd

(in reply to LadyConstanze)
Profile   Post #: 58
RE: Poll about BDSM activity requiring hospitalization - 3/20/2014 9:10:36 AM   
KnightofMists


Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: JeffBC

~fast reply~

To the poster that spawned this poll... a bit of information here. Some of the posters on CM are HIGHLY active in the community. Some of them are or have been professional dommes. In other words, these people have seen a LOT of people and a LOT of shit happen over the years so if we start talking about 3rd party incidents well... that's going to make things look pretty horrid unless they also talk about all the bajillion 3rd party incidents where person A spanked person B and nothing interesting happened.



You know... After some 14 years active in the community... I have only met one person that ended up in the hospital that was involved in BDSM at the time the emergency occurred. Interesting fact... The BDSM had nothing to do with why she ended up in the hospital.... It was just one of those sad life events where the timing made things very complicated for her Dominant at the time. But he was properly cleared and they moved forward as best they could give her medical condition that made dramatic entrance into their lives.

I can't begin to tell you all the plays I have witnessed or were apart of over the years. But safe to say it is in the thousands. I have never seen an incident that brought people to the hospital and as I said above I am only aware of one incident where I have met the person personally that ended up in the hospital.

I am not one for urban myths and my experience tells me that the probability of someone that is actively playing within the community play spaces is very very remote that they will end up in the hospital. Now, I can't say that those who are playing in there private play space have the same odds. I fact, I suspect the odds are alittle worse. But I don't expect them to be that much worse... Particularly if said people who play privately are also out in the community play spaces.

I think my biggest concern would be those individuals who are an island. Playing quietly behind close doors under the radar. Seems like the odds could be worse in those experiences, I am just not sure how worse they would be.


Edited to add.

Also keep in mind not all trips to the hospital are equal. There is a big difference from being checked in the hospital for several days compared to a trip to the emergency ward to get a few stitches and back home. Also, there was a case several months ago where two of three people ended up at the morgue and one in the hospital. I think the hospital visit was preferred in that situation.



< Message edited by KnightofMists -- 3/20/2014 9:18:55 AM >

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to JeffBC)
Profile   Post #: 59
RE: Poll about BDSM activity requiring hospitalization - 3/20/2014 9:14:39 AM   
LadyConstanze


Posts: 9722
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline 		LOL, well if you want war stories, a new tens unit and I tend to try everything out on myself because you gotta know what you dish out (apart from CBT, I don't have the equipment for that), it was one that plugs into the mains, I think it's broken because I can't feel a thing and crank it up and crank it up, nothing, other half notices something plugged in but the little switch that activates the socket (UK thing) not on, so he flicks it, and I did acrobatics....

_____________________________

There are 10 kinds of people who understand binary
Those who do and those who don't!

http://exdomme.blogspot.com/2012/07/public-service-announcement.html

(in reply to JeffBC)
Profile   Post #: 60
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