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Seeking advice/info on lifestyle - 3/31/2014 7:50:45 PM

Leatherprincess4

Posts: 11
Joined: 3/31/2014
Status: offline

Hey everyone. I'm fairly new to the bdsm lifestyle and am still trying to decide if its right for me. I'd love to just dive right in and go balls to the wall but I want some advice on how the lifestyle might affect my social/professional life. How do y'all balance your daily life with play time? Does everyone have a normal job or does your work life blend with your sex life?

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RE: Seeking advice/info on lifestyle - 3/31/2014 7:54:25 PM

Missokyst

Posts: 6041
Joined: 9/9/2006
Status: offline

Does anyone's work blend with their sex lives? I mean for those people who are not in the sex trade. Most people I know have regular jobs, regular family and friends that are not privy to their kink. Why would they be? My balance came with doing this with knowing that getting my ass beat was not going to feed my family.

_____________________________

pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding ~Gibran, Kahlil

“The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth suffering for.”
― Bob Marley

(in reply to Leatherprincess4)

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RE: Seeking advice/info on lifestyle - 3/31/2014 8:03:49 PM

littlewonder

Posts: 15659
Status: offline

Our life is just like everyone else's. We both work, come home, eat dinner, do chores, etc...get ready for bed and do it all over again the next day. The only difference is who is in charge in the relationship.

_____________________________

Nothing has changed
Everything has changed

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RE: Seeking advice/info on lifestyle - 3/31/2014 8:04:16 PM

Leatherprincess4

Posts: 11
Joined: 3/31/2014
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I have a few friends that are into it but they are really open about it. Guess I was just wondering if that's always the case. Also, as far as meeting people that are into the lifestyle, are there any hints/signals I could keep an eye out for? I'm a little scared of just going all out and explaining my interests to a new person for fear if how they might react.

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RE: Seeking advice/info on lifestyle - 3/31/2014 8:28:13 PM

MissImmortalPain

Posts: 2440
Joined: 4/1/2011
Status: offline

Hello, princess. One of the things you can do to meet people is get involved with any local groups that might be in your area. See if they have a munch you can attend (most groups have them about once a month) The are very open gatherings. No one gets weird or acts differently than they normally would. Just a nice meeting/lunch where people can get together and talk.

_____________________________

It is always by way of pain that we arrive at pleasure.

We must all go through a right of passage,and it must be physical, it must be painful,and it must leave a mark.

(in reply to Leatherprincess4)

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RE: Seeking advice/info on lifestyle - 3/31/2014 9:19:30 PM

SeekingTrinity

Posts: 1834
Joined: 5/29/2012
From: The 'burbs of Portland, OR
Status: offline

~FRing it~

My guy and I manage to keep our kink lives entirely separated from our professional lives. We don't mark areas (accidentally) not covered by clothing. I've got a beautiful necklace (symbolic collar) made of polished tiny stones that look just like any other 'nilla lady's necklace. We also wear two black rubber rings on our ring fingers. I guess it means someone is taken in some of the kink scene back East, but I (a West Coast lifelong dweller) never heard of it before. We are very vanilla appearing if you met us out in public, so you wouldn't guess we're kinky at all.

I second what the others have said about meeting folks in your local kink community. It's easier to explain you to someone already predisposed to think kink like you do. I stopped dating vanilla because I hated having to have the "there is something a bit alternative about me" conversation. I found it much easier to find partners who were kink-oriented like me

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RE: Seeking advice/info on lifestyle - 3/31/2014 9:33:24 PM

DarkSteven

Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline

My sub Tasha and I session maybe an hour a week and go to play parties once a week. Aside from that, we look and act vanilla.

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

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RE: Seeking advice/info on lifestyle - 4/1/2014 8:47:23 AM

Leatherprincess4

Posts: 11
Joined: 3/31/2014
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Thanks guys! I see all of y'all are out of state. I looked up groups around Dallas but most of them are gay exclusive. Are there any that y'all frequent that operate in Dallas as well?

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RE: Seeking advice/info on lifestyle - 4/1/2014 9:47:27 AM

MissImmortalPain

Posts: 2440
Joined: 4/1/2011
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http://www.dallasbdsm.com/local_groups.htm

_____________________________

It is always by way of pain that we arrive at pleasure.

We must all go through a right of passage,and it must be physical, it must be painful,and it must leave a mark.

(in reply to Leatherprincess4)

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