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i need some help giving up control - 4/1/2014 11:35:33 PM

taboofag

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Joined: 3/16/2014
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ive always wanted to give up complete control to a dom master. i finally found the right one and i need a little push to go through with it

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RE: i need some help giving up control - 4/2/2014 5:03:30 AM

Focus50

Posts: 3962
Joined: 12/28/2004
From: Newcastle, Australia
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Probably the first step is trust. Which has me curious as to how "right" this one is for you if you need a push in the "trust" direction.

Start with trusting your instincts about him - shouldn't need much experience there. Rhetorical, btw; don't convince me so much as the one in your mirror.

And welcome to the discussion forums. :)

Focus.

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RE: i need some help giving up control - 4/2/2014 8:04:26 AM

JeffBC

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Joined: 2/12/2012
From: Canada
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Focus50
Probably the first step is trust. Which has me curious as to how "right" this one is for you if you need a push in the "trust" direction.

Start with trusting your instincts about him - shouldn't need much experience there. Rhetorical, btw; don't convince me so much as the one in your mirror.

And welcome to the discussion forums. :)

Focus.

Yeah.. that :)

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I'm a lover of "what is", not because I'm a spiritual person, but because it hurts when I argue with reality. -- Bryon Katie
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RE: i need some help giving up control - 4/2/2014 9:50:02 AM

merge9

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Joined: 6/11/2012
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OP - How do you know he's the right one?

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RE: i need some help giving up control - 4/2/2014 10:19:09 AM

hlen5

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Joined: 3/2/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: JeffBC

quote:

ORIGINAL: Focus50
Probably the first step is trust. Which has me curious as to how "right" this one is for you if you need a push in the "trust" direction.

Start with trusting your instincts about him - shouldn't need much experience there. Rhetorical, btw; don't convince me so much as the one in your mirror.

And welcome to the discussion forums. :)

Focus.

Yeah.. that :)

+1

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RE: i need some help giving up control - 4/2/2014 10:29:09 AM

SeekingTrinity

Posts: 1834
Joined: 5/29/2012
From: The 'burbs of Portland, OR
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~FRing it~

I think Focus50 pretty much nailed it. I've found that the hardest part at first is being able to let go. It's a lot of gut instinct type stuff, not really anything anyone else can push you towards or guide you on. You know you...and him best. What makes him "the right one" in your eyes?

Have you both had talks about your limits? Filled out a BDSM checklist outlining where you can and can't go? If you did, how did he act? Did he seem genuinely invested and interested in what you had to say...maybe even asked clarifying questions to indicate he was actively thinking about things?

I wish you luck and hope everything turns out great

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RE: i need some help giving up control - 4/2/2014 7:08:00 PM

littlewonder